The Letter 'E' is NOT Uncommon

Merry Christmas

2009-12-24T06:19:00.000-08:00

I started this blog because I wanted to have a venue where I could express my thoughts and ideas. It began with a heartbreak and then evolved into something more. I've made lots of friends through this blog which I will treasure for the rest of my life. Thank you fellow bloggers for making my online life interesting.

Special shoutouts to Mcvie, FreeLance, Wandering Polar Bear, Outednarnian, Jaybeecc, Datswhy, Misterhubs. Merry Christmas. I wish you well, guys.

This will be the last entry of TheLetterE.

Pico de Loro

2009-11-15T08:30:00.000-08:00

Today, my friends and I went to Pico de Loro in order to celebrate our last day in Medicine Electives and the start of our 1-month Community Medicine rotation in Bulacan and Navotas. Here are some of the pictures I took using the Iphone.

Stylish Interiors

Great facade facing the beach

Infinity pools

Comfortable chairs!

Another look at the pool

Hallway leading to the lockers

Massage Area

Lobby

Nice fixture

Male locker room.. parang powder room hehehe

Some of my friends

Tired after an entire day of fun and sun!

My constant travel buddies!

Final shot before we departed for Manila

Friends

2009-11-15T08:10:00.000-08:00

Carlo's dad suddenly passed away this afternoon. It felt weird. We were still texting each other about my Tagaytay trip. He was asking me if we could have coffee sometime, when suddenly I received a message from him saying that his father just died. I called him immediately and offered my sincere condolences to him and his family. I found myself wanting to be with him at this trying times but then tomorrow I start my duty in Bulacan, so I might just visit his dad's remains on Friday.

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Jon is figuring out how to court someone. I told him it's weird that he has to think about the how's and why's of courtship when he was so natural back then. Ayaw pa niyang magkuwento kung sino ang bago niyang prospect. Ayaw pakilatis sa akin? Hehehe. I told him that he should find out what his date's likes and dislikes as well as the things he does in his free time and start from there. I wish him luck.

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Joms just arrived from UK. It was nice to finally have a chat with him over coffee last week. I'm glad that he has already settled in and is ready to find a work. I hope he gets the one where his master's degree can be put to good use. Anyway, hopefully we could reschedule our movie plans next week when I get back from the province.

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Donald is thinking of quitting his job and moving to the US of A for better opportunities. Actually he has a very nice and stable job as a professor but office politics and lack of growth is pushing him to seek greener pasture somewhere else. If ever things push through, I'm gonna miss our conversations on each and other's lives.

That Scary Unexpected Incident

2009-10-18T04:37:00.000-07:00

Today, I woke up rather late. I really planned to wake up early, hear mass, make my cardio report before MH and I watch Spring Awakening at RCBC. The thing is, I got up around 10 am and I wanted to sleep even more. Nevertheless, I pushed myself out of bed, do my daily routines and decided to just hear the 12nn mass at Greenbelt Chapel so that afterwards I could meet up with MH.

So I was at Seattle's Best Coffee, Greenbelt 3 around 11:30 am, multitasking: sipping my coffee while listening to my ipod while reading my cardio book and making my presentation. Out of nowhere I heard a bang. Deadma. That was then followed by several more shots. I wasn't bothered. I haven't heard gunfire before so I thought it was just some noise outside. Then a couple started running inside the store. There was fear in woman's face. She was talking to the security guard. I can barely hear them. The guard then locked all the doors. No one was leaving the place. The employees started huddling near the counter. Outside, other security guards started moving towards Greenbelt 1 and 5. I can see people running outside from the direction of GB1 and Gb5 towards GB3.

I got curious so I got up and asked the cashier what's happening. They informed me that there has been gunfight near Gb1 and 5. They initially informed us that several armed men robbed the Rolex store across GB1 and that they were now inside GB5. I can't help but panic. We were locked inside a store facing GB5, both corners made of glass enclosure. I don't know what to do. I quickly fixed my things. I was trembling that time. I'm scared that any moment now bullets might just coming flying through the glass walls.

I then stood near the door. All the time listening to conversations between the guard and some of the customers trapped inside. We heard sirens. There were still people moving from all directions going to GB3. The guard then opened the door and informed us that we can already go out but we must take extra care since the armed men are still inside GB5.

I quickly went inside GB3. Most of the people were huddled near the coffee exhibit near Linea Italia. The stores were closed that time though the employees were inside. Some were taking pictures of what was happening. I sat outside Sketchbooks. Earlier Jamie called me. He told me to stay calm and do not panic. I'd like to think that I wasn't panicking or if I did, I was channeling it through Twitter or Facebook. I didn't want to call my mom for she might just have a heart attack. The online connection was the only thing keeping me sane that time. (I am not that 'matapang'). And of course, prayers. I was updating my online accounts almost every minute. Most of them unverified. I was listening to the guards' conversations with the customers as well as personnels.

I stayed inside the mall for like 45 minutes. When I thought it was safe to go out, I went to Rennaisance Hotel. Initially I wanted to look for my aunt who's working there, but decided not to. I know my family too well. If I told her I'm there she'll panic, inform my mom, then my mom will panic. Anyway, I found a comfortable place near the stairs. MH texted me that he'll pick me up. I told him to avoid Gb1 area for safety reasons. Boy am I glad when I saw him. I held his hand tight. We eventually went to the Fort to have lunch. I never thought I was hungry until the food came. Everything tasted special that time. Hay. What a day. What a scary day. I hope this does not happen again.

Postscript: The Rolex store inside GB5 was the one robbed, not the one across GB1. One of the gunmen died during the shootout. Others escaped.

Why I Almost Gave Up

2009-09-15T07:58:00.000-07:00

I just need to get this off my chest.

A month ago, I attended a meeting with the dean as well as the student council and organizations ng medicine. I was invited by the president so that the clerks will have a representative. The agenda that time was the forthcoming medicine week. Medicine week has always been a fun event dahil medyo laidback kami that time. Walang scheduled exams. Puro fun, fun, fun. Usually mga clerks hindi kasama since they are always busy with what they're doing sa hospital. Kapag wala namang pasok, most of my apartment-mates would just stay at home to catch up on precious sleep.

This year, the student council decided to include us in the activities. Ako naman e hindi nagoobject sa ganyang activities, lalo na nung inexplain ng president na this is for a united medicine. Kais nga nafefeel nila na naleleft out ang mga students once they reach 4th year. So there I was, listening to the rundown of activites ng biglang i-aanounce ng VP nila na may interbatch DANCE competition (empasis on the dance). May prize daw ito: trophy and 25,000 cash. Bongga di ba? So ang theme daw ay Michael Jackson songs. Nagpabunot sila ng song para daw fair. Ang nabunot ko e BEAT IT. Ang instructions that time was that 15 dancers ang minimum. Ako naman, agad text sa mga kabatchmates ko na dating member ng dance org ng med. Excited silang lahat. I also informed the group leaders ng batch namin kasi baka may other clerks na interested to dance on their freetime, sayang naman.

So lumipas ang mga araw, all I know is that ok ang dance entry namin. Naka-18 nga sila na dancers e. Dumating ang September, Resident's Night preparations. Resident's Night naman is a contest for the house staff ng hospital. Every year they have a theme kung saan each department will prepare a 20 minute production. No clerks alllowed. Hanggang cheer lang kami and support.

Anyway, so one of the residents asked me if may clerks kayang interested kumanta or sumayaw, or do anything for the opening number para naman may participation kami since we're also part of the hospital. I immediately said yes knowing that there are a lot of us who are interested to perform lalo na't musicale ang theme nila ngayon.

Then the group who were assigned to dance sa contest suddenly texted me na they are backing out of the competition dahil may interested nga sumayaw, kaso hindi naman sila nakakapagmeet since hindi sila magkakapareho ng service and days-off. Ayaw naman nila i-compromise yung quality ng dance na gagawin nila just for the sake na may masali kami. I totally agreed with them. They asked a favor if I could explain na lang sa SC president since I am the counterpart sa clerks. The few people who were supposed to be part of the contest then expressed interest in joining the opening program. Siyempre, sinali ko sila. Hindi naman ako tumatanggi basta gusto.

The next day, I informed one of the student council members, PRO ata siya regarding the decision of the group. I explained to him what happened and it seemed to me na naintindihan niya where the clerks are coming from. Nagulat na lang ako nung hapon when I was called sa office by one of my classmates na nagalit daw yung consultant na head ng mga orgs dahil daw nagback-out kami sa contest para sumali sa Resident's night. Siyempre, pumunta ako agad doon sa SC para magexplain and iclear ang nangyari.

That afternoon, I met up with the SC president to explain to her mywhat happened. I was shocked na lang na they have a totally different version of the story. Turns out one of the members of the contest talked to her first before I did and medyo mali ang nasabi niya. Sabi niya: "XX hindi kami na makakasali sa contest dahil nagdecide ang batch namin na huwag na lang since hindi naman kami nakakapagpractice. Pero pwede ba namin gamitin yung room na nireserve mo sa amin para magpractice for Resident's Night?" Egad! Nanlumo ako! Maling-mali ang sinabi niya! Delicadeza lang naman dapat ang pairalin, di ba? bakit mo hihiramin ang room na nakareserve na for the practice sa contest na tinatanggihan mong salihan? So there. Diyaan nagstart ang gulo.

Turns out Ms. President went to the head of the organizations and informed him na hindi na sasali ang dancers namin. Of course the doctor asked kung bakit and ang nangyari, well, kinuwento niya ang sinabi sa kanya nung dancer. So galit na galit yung dr. at nagstart magthreaten na huwag kami bigyan ng room reservations for any activity. Then pinatawag ako. I tried to explain my version of the story pero the president was bent on having us join the activity. Tapos hindi niya talaga malet-go yung idea na sasaywa kami sa Resident's Night at hindi sa activity nila. She even kept on emphasizing na hidni kami supposedly kasama sa plano ng med week, pero pinilit nila kaming isama. pumayag ang dean. pumayag ang regent. Pumayag ang head ng orgs. Lahat nakahanda na for us, kailangan lang namin magshow-up at magpractice and eventually magperform.

So I said I'll try to talk to them again and I'll get back to her asap. I then talked to the org head, and said the ame thing. So ako naman, I told my clerkmates na kailangan sumali. Concern naman nila that time was how they are going to practice. Sabi ko excused naman from duty ang mga tao. Inform ko lang daw yung SC kung sino ang mga sasayaw para magawan ng excuse letter. Next question they threw at me was anong ibig sabihin ng excused. 1 is to 1 or 1 is to nada. What they meant was if excused kami today to practice do we have make up that one day some other time, or excused siya na walang kapalit na make-up days. I immediately clarified it with the SC. Naintindihan ko yung concern nila about make-ups. Yung iba kasi sa amin more than 10 make-ups na. E you are required to have less than 10 make-ups before the written exams sa December. So ayon, tinanong ko ang SC president. Ang reply niya was 1:1 pero try daw niyang kausapin ang mga authority baka magawan ng paraan kasi sasayaw naman kami e. So in short 1:1 siya. I told her that dahil siyan baka lalong walang sumayaw kasi, let's face it, extra curricular activity siya. At the end of the day, what counts is the grade that you got while you are at the hospital, and adding one make-up day to your list of make-ups is not a good idea.

In the end 8 lang out of 400+ clerks ang nagtext na sasali sila despite of teh consequences. I texted the names to the president. Hindi naman siya nagrereply.

Fast forward to yesterday, from duty ako. Supposedly hanggang 12 nn lang ako pero I stayed til 2 para naman makakinig ako sa reporting ng 1-2 pm. While I was at the conference, tumawag ang head ng mga orgs. Pumunta daw ako when I have time sa surgery office, kakausapin daw niya ako. So I excused myself para naman makausap ko siya.

When I went into the office, nandoon din yung dr. na in-charge sa amin sa clerkship. Pinaupo ako and kinausap ni doc in a stern manner. Simple lang naman ang sinabi niya: Let's get this over with. Sasayaw ba ang batch mo o hindi. Para matapos na. Kung hidni sila sasayaw, I'll just give the slot to one of the fraternities dahil gsutong gusto nila sumayaw. Kapag hidni nga lang kayo sasali, I'll make sure na yang Terps (org ng mga dancers sa med, wherein most of my dancer friends/clerkmates are members) na iyan e hindi mababan sa medicine. Second yang si MN (president ng Terps na kabatch ko) at yung iba pang members na hindi sila makakasayaw sa any activity sa med school. Tapos kayong mga clerks, hidni pwedeng sumali sa Resident's Night. Hindi kayo maeexcused from your post sa gabing iyon. Then the residents? Hindi sila pwedeng magpractice sa Medical Arts Building Penthouse for their performance. Bakit kasi sasayaw kayo doon, e inaalila lang kayo doon? Ano makukuha niyo doon? Of course I tried to explain the side of the clerks, pero hindi na siya open about it. Nasesense ko naman sa demeanor niya so I just said na I'll give him an answer before the day ends.

Paglabas ko ng office, nandoon na ang mga clerkmates ko and members of the present Terps. Inis sila with what's happening. The present Terps officers naman ay nag-aask ng help since nadamay sila sa gulong ito. So I decided to talk to the president ng SC once and for all.

I went to their office and I found her fixing some goodie bags. For souvenir ata siya by the looks of it.

Me: XX can I talk to you? Alam mo XX, this is not fun anymore. This medicine week. It's not fun anymore kasi naiipit kami. I know for a fact na what you gusy wanted was a great project. It's an ideal project. Pero, it's not realistic. Alam niyo naman yung schedule namin sa hospital..

Hindi na ako nakatapos kasi sumabat na siya.

XX: Kaya nga kinukuha ko ang names ninyo para magawan kayo ng excused letter e. Kahit nga ang Regent natin gusto kayo i-excused ng 7 days para lang makapagparticipate kayo. Alam mo nung summer pa lang, noong leadership training seminar pa lang namin, plinano na ito. Kasama sila dean, si Dr. X ng orgs sa pagplano. Sabi nga ni doc X, siya na bahala sa inyo e.

M: E wala naman nagconsult sa amin when you met. no one asked us kung ok lang ba sa amin na sumali. Kasi let's face it, hindi ako magpipilit ng something na ayaw gawin ng mga tao.

X: Hindi mo kasi sila minomotivate e.

M: (Siyempre nag-init ang ulo ko di ba?) Anong hindi minomotivate? E tinext ko nga mga groups para kung may interested na sumali e makasali sila. I even told them about the prize. Pero walang nagreply sa akin except for those who really wanted to dance. Tapos, hindi pa excused talaga ang mga tao, 1 is to 1 pa din. Paano sila maeenganyo sumali. And to tell you honestly, hindi ako naging presidente nung high school council as well as ng premed dahil hindi ako nagmomotivate. Hindi lang ako yung tipong namimilit sumali sa activity na ayaw naman nilang salihan. Kasi in the first place extra-curricular siya. That mean it's not part of the general curriculum of the school.

Sige, eto na lang ang tanong ko sayo. Is the activity a REQUIRED ACTIVITY or not.

X: It's implied (with matching taas ng eyebrows and kunot ng noo.. to think na 2nd year lang siya ha...)

M: (WTF is that??? My question was answerable with a Yes or No) I was just asking for a yes or no. Again. Is the activity a REQUIRED activity from the start or not? (I explained further, baka slow ang lola mo) Kasi if yes, e di no questions asked, sasali talaga kami, kahit mag-isa akong magperform sa stage.

X: (Poker face) It's implied.

M: (Gazillion degree rise in body temp sa galit) Bakit ba sobrang namamagnify ang hindi namin pagsali sa contest na ito, e kung titignan mo naman yung ibang events, may contestants kami?

X: E kasi sasayaw kayo sa Resident's Night pero dito hindi. Basically hidni ko na problem ito. It's between the clerks and Dr. X na

M: (Super nagtitimpi talaga ako para hindi sumigaw and all) Ganito na lang, since you kept on telling me about a United Medicine (although I never thought na divided kami until now), a One Med. Ganito na lang. Hindi kami sasali sa activity niyo. Hindi din kami sasali sa activity ng residents. Just let the Terps go. Wag niyo na silang idamay dito.

X: Ay kasalanan nila iyan. It's between them and Org head. Problem nila iyon (In a making-pacute-face way pa niya sinabi iyan)

M: (Init alao ang ulo) O sige ganito. One med tayo di ba? You kept on insisting that you want every one to be united. Nagyon, ang mga clerks naiipit. Ikaw, as president ng SC, ano ang matutulong mo sa amin? (Pang beauty contest question ito ha)

X: Ay hindi sa amin ang clerks. It's between you and Dr. X. Wala akong pakialam diyan...

M: (In my mind) Punyeta ka (Pardon the language, galit talaga ako), anong One Med, One Med ang pinagsasabi mo diyan, ngayong crunch time na iniiwan mo kami. Boba ka talaga, hindi ka marunong sumagot ng Q and A. No wonder na delay ka sa med.

X:.. (siyempre hindi pa siya tapos sumagot, may pahabol pa) Alam mo wala akong pakialam kung sumayaw kayo o hindi. Isang activity lang iyan sa med week, madami pa akong pinoproblema. Tignan mo ito (gesturing to her loot bags na ginagawa), madami akong ginagawa. Anong pakialam ko sa clerks. I could care less kung sumayaw kayo o hindi.

M: (Buti at magaling ako magpigil ng sarili, kundi najombag ko na siya right then and there) Yun naman pala e, wala ka naman palang pakialam sa mga clerk, so why are you making a big deal out of all this?

X: (blurted out) E sasayaw kayo sa Resident's Night e.

M: (Di ko kinaya. Nakakaloka ang Q&A namin) I'm not getting through to you ( Sabay walk-out)

Paglabas ko, nakausap ko ulit si Dr. X. Same tune, threat and all. I tried to explain again in behalf of the clerks, pero he's not listening. He even endorsed me to the Assistant Dean.

Dr. X: Dra. eto o head ng clerks, hindi daw sasali sa VARIETY SHOW. Ano ba gagawin natin? Sabi ko siya na magsabi sa Dean niyan personally kasi ako wala akong balak kausapin ang dean about it. E ano bang nakukuha nila sa Resident's Night? E inaalipin lang sila doon e?

Dra: E siyempre nabubura yung mga demerits nila kasi puro merit doon. Hala sige ikaw mag-explain kay dean.

(Sabay daan ng Doctor na in-charge sa clerks)

Dr.-in-charge: O Eugene, wala bang marunong kumanta sa inyo? O sumayaw? kahit Ano?

Dr. X: Just shows what kind of leader you are. 400+ kayo and hindi ka man lang makapaghanap ng magpeperform. Lagi na lang terps terps terps.

Right then and there gusto ko ng umiyak and magquit. Everyone was against us. Everyone in authority. Parang damned if you do, damned if you don't. All this time I was informed na DANCE CONTEST SIYA!!!!!!!! Tapos now VARIETY SHOW PALA SIYA?!!! Shit talaga!

I held myself together and went out of the office. Outside, some of my friends were waiting for an answer. I aired out my frustration and my decision. Sabi ko sa kanila, kailangan nating magperform. Kahit ano na. Variety show naman pala e. Some of my clerkmates are soooo angry. We decided to make one performance na lang for both activity. Hindi na kami susunod sa theme. Bahala na kung paano namin gagawin ang BEAT IT at Fame (dapat peperform namin sa opening night). Basta may maperform.

When I went back to the clerks room. I talked to all my co-clerks at medicine. That was around 4 pm. Dapat natutulog na niyan ako that time kasi from duty ako, but no. I needed to let everything out of my chest. I need them to understand why I said yes. They were all supportive naman. I even met with the different group leaders para maupdate sila. Basically gabi na ako nakauwi.

Sobra akong depressed yesterday. I was sooo disappointed with some of the people I look up to in medicine. Sobra. I was so angry din at the same time sa SC pres. Sa sobrang buwisit ko na lipasan na ako ng gutom (hindi pa ako ngalunch and dinner that time ha). Natulog na lang ako.

Kaninang pagising ko, ayoko na lang pumasok. Gusto ko ng magquit ngpagiging president ng clerks. Ayoko na ng ganito. Yung tipong nahihirapan ka na ngang isingit ang pag-aaral sa duties dahil sa sobrang pagod tapos, ganyan pa ang mangyayari.

On my way to the hospital, naisip ko, what if I'm just an ordinary student? Wala akong ganitong problem. Papasok lang ako. Do my part sa hospital. Go home on time. Study. Probably date. O kaya mag gym. Then rest. But no. Andito ako, naiipit, nasisigawan, at nasasabihan ng "you don't motivate your groupmates... and what kind of leader are you.."

Then I got a vision of that bitch laughing out loud kasi nagquit ako. Siyet! I've got more leadership experience than this dumbass. Hindi ako magpapatalo sa kanya. Right then and there I decided to not give up and face all my responsibilities. Sabi nga nila, God does not give you challenges that he thinks you cannot handle. Isang malaking 'learning' experience lang ito. Hindi ako papatalo.

Heto. In the end, kinda felt better. Although wala pa kaming nagagawang number, at least ok na ako. Fighting mode na!

God help us all...Please =) (I wanna kick some ass!)

Mr. and Ms. Thomasian Doctors 2009

2009-08-04T09:11:00.000-07:00

Every year, the UST Residents try to raise funds for the patients at the UST Clinical Division by holding a fundraising pageant between the clerks, interns and residents. This year, 2 of my clerkmates will be representing our batch in this event. The money that will be collected will be donated to the hospital for the use of our less fortunate kababayans.

Part of the winners will be through a contest on who gets the most monetary donations. So, if there's anyone who wants to donate under the name of our batchmates, feel free to leave a message at the comments section. Any amount will do =). Again, the money that will be collected will be donated to the Sts. Cosmas and Damian Fund of the UST Clinical Division.

Clk. Mike Medina

Clk. Golda Soler

Dermatology

2009-08-04T07:24:00.000-07:00

After two weeks of gruelling fun at neurology and psychiatry, we found ourselves in the peaceful queendom (sic) of dermatology, where the residents and consultants are either beautiful or have blemish free skin. Hindi din kami toxic dito. Although we are required to be at the hospital at 7 am for the daily quiz, medyo light yung work. Puro outpatient lang kami, walang ward work, walang 'q'-ing of patients. We even have to time to go outside and have lunch without the risk of being given a demerit for being out-of-post/not-within-the-hospital-grounds. May free intralesional injections pa para sa mga taong katulad ko na hindi nabiyayaan ng kutis porselana hehehe. Anyway, here are some of our pictures during one of our lunchbreaks. This one's taken at Santorini's, a Korean restaurant owned by our Korean classmate's friend. Weird ang name no? Italian for a Korean Restaurant!

Tinie and Justine, our Korean classmate

Alain, my forever groupmate, who's expecting his 2nd baby come Novemeber was with us that day

Kitchie is my activist-doctor friend hehehe

The Lovers

Byron, Karla and Ruby

Today, biglang pumasok ang aming Korean friend na si Justine na nakalugay.

Justine's long wavy hair

Ayan napagtripan namin ang kanyang long, wavy hair. Ito ang kinalabasan:

Theresa, sporting a newly permed hairdo

At ito ang nangyayari kapag madami kang kaklaseng babaeng walang magawa:

Hahaha hindi man lang nagaya ang buhok ng F4 hahaha!

Ang Dalawang Patay sa Pagtatapos ng Hulyo

2009-08-03T05:15:00.000-07:00

Sa pagtatapos ng rotation ko sa neurology and psychiatry, dalawa ang namatay. Isang pangulo na may malubhang karamdaman at isang pasyenteng masiglahin bago pa man maoperahan. Nakakalungkot isipin na minsan, si kamatayan dumadalaw sa mga sandaling hindi mo inaasahan.

Matagal ko ng alam na may sakit si Pres. Cory. Siguro naman lahat ng taong nakatira sa Pilipinas, alam ito. Sa totoo lang, simula ng narinig ko na siya ay may sakit, nabuo na sa aking isipan na siya'y di na magtatagal. Namatay din kasi ang kapatid ng lolo ko sa colon cancer. Ganoon ding ang butihin niyang may bahay makaraan ang ilang buwan. Alam kong medyo tagilid ang laban sa uri ng cancer na ito kahit na ba'y sabihin nating marami ng gamot at makabagong teknolohiyang naimbento sa paggamot dito. Alam ko ito dahil nasubukan na ng kamag-anak ko ang halos lahat ng gamutan, aprubado man o hindi. Pati mga trials nasalihan na ng lolo ko. Napadpad pa nga sila sa ibang bansa para magpagamot. In the end, namatay din siya. Sa makatuwid sure na ako na kahit anong oras maaring mamatay ni Cory. Oo si Cory. Ang pinakamamahal na presidente ng Pilipinas.

Wala akong alaala ng People Power. 2 years old pa lang ako ng mga panahong iyon. Ang alam ko lang atang gawin ng mga oras na iyon ay gumising, kumain at matulog. Sa aking paglaki, saka ko lang nalaman ang tungkol sa EDSA, sa Peaceful Revolution at nakilala si Cory.

Nakaukit na sa aking isipan ang mga katagang "The First Woman President of the Philippines and in Asia" kapag binibigkas ang pangalan niya. Dilaw ang kanyang paboritong kulay at may asawa siyang National Hero. Nang naglaon, saka ko na napahalagahan ang mga bagay na kanyang pinaglaban. Freedom of speech, human rights at ang konstitusyon. Ilan lang iyan sa mga bagay na naibahagi sa atin ng maybahay ni Ninoy. Marahil hindi ko ganap lubusang maisip ang kahalagahan nitong mga ito habang ako'y lumalaki ngunit ngayon, lalo na't nalalapit na ang halalan, ngayon ko nadadama ang importansya ng mga bagay na ibinahagi ni Cory sa atin. Kalayaang magsalita tungkol sa mga pangyayaring nais natin kilatisin. Kalayaan maipamahagi ang ating mga saloobin. Kalayaang humubog ng mga salita upang maipamahagi ang mga bagay na lumalaro sa ating isipan. Karapatang pantao. Karapatang maituring bilang tao. Konstitusyon.

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Si kuya, nakilala ko ng ako'y nagrotate sa Neurology. Nakakatuwa ang kuwento ni kuya kaya siya napasok sa ospital. Kasagsagan ng A(H1N1) noon sa ating bansa ng magkalagnat siya. Dinala siya ng kanyang mga kamag-anak sa isang pribadong ospital para masuri. Nang naroon sila, napagmasdan ng mg duktor na tila may kakaiba sa tindig ni kuya. Nagrequest sila ng CT scan thinking na baka may Parkinson's si kuya. Doon nila natagpuan ang isang tumor sa kanyang utak. Medyo malaki at natutulak na ang ibang parte ng utak. At that time, nalipat na si kuya sa aming institusyon.

Dito, may ilang pagsusuri pang ginawa upang mapagtanto kung anong klaseng tumor ang tumubo sa loob ng ulo ni kuya. In the end, napagdisisyunan ng mga doktor na ang definite treatment para kay kuya ay ang magpaopera.

Dito ko nakilala si kuya, noong mga panahong naghihintay na siya ng OR schedule. Matangkad si kuya, medyo mestisuhin. Kung hindi mo siya kilala, mapagkakamalan mo siyang isang guro sa isang unibersidad. Mahilig matulog si kuya. Kung hindi naman tulog, nakaupo siya sa kama at kinakausap ang kanyang anak na lalake o kaya ineentertain ang kanyang mga bisita. Sa sandaling nakasama ko siya sa ospital, masasabi kong mabait na tao siya. Masayahin. Madasalin. Medyo bugnutin nga lang paminsan-minsan. Ayaw magpacheck ng vital signs kapag natutulog. Medyo mainipin din. Gusto laging malaman kung kailan siya ooperahin.

Noong gabi bago ang kanyang operasyon, duty ako. As usual, every hou namin minomonitor ang mga pasyente. 'Q'-ing ang tawag namin dito. Kinukuha namin ang mga vital signs nila tulad ng blood pressure, heart rate, respiratory rate, temperature at GCS score. Naalala ko noong gabing iyon, hindi mapalagay si kuya. Nakaupo sa kama. Maya-maya nama'y nakahiga pero nakadilat ang mga mata. Nang usisain ko, sabi niya'y hindi siya makatulog, excited na daw siya na matapos ito ng makauwi na siya. Nakakatamad din kasi sa ward, walang TV at hindi niya makausap ang kanyang mga kaibigan.

Seven am ng umaga ang operasyon ni kuya. Sinundo siya ng operating room nurse mga quarter to seven. Ako ang huling kumuha ng vitals niya bago siya dalhin sa O.R. Masaya siya that day. Hindi naman daw siya kinakabahan ng kamustahin ko. Sabi ko pagdadasal ko siya na sana'y maging smooth sailing ang operasyon niya. Iyon ang huling beses na nakausap ko siya.

The next day nalaman ko na lang sa kaklase ko na may di kanais-nais na nangyari habang siya ay inooperahan. Hidni kinaya ng utak ni kuya ang operasyon. Sa mga huling oras nito, namaga ang brain niya, at hindi nila maisara ang skull. Nilagay si kuya sa ICU. Ayokong umakyat that time. Ayoko siyang makita. Ang description nila sa kanya is that lumobo ang mukha niya at may diaper-like cover lang siya sa utak dahil nagsweswell pa ito. Pinagdadasal namin that time na sana maging ok siya. Kailangan maging ok siya. Dahil waht are the chance na magiging ok siya? Malaki ayon sa libro. Ilang posyento lang ng pasyenteng inooperahan ng may ganoong kondisyon ang namamatay. Hindi kami makapaniwala na noong isang araw e kausap ko lang siya, ngayon nasa ICU na siya.

Nagtagal ng mga limang araw sa surgical ICU si kuya. Noong ikatlong araw niya doon, duty ulit ako. Naglakas loob akong pumasok sa ICU para makita siya. Totoo nga ang description ng kaklase ko sa kanya. nag-iba ang itsura niya. Magang-maga ang mukha, may tela na nagsisilbing takip ng utak niya. Nakahook siya sa mga machines. Hindi dumidilat. Pumapangit ang vital signs. That night nalungkot kami ng kaibigan ko. Ayaw namin siyang mamatay. Gusto namin siyang makausap, kamustahin sa kanyang pakiramdam. Sa mga oras na iyon, narealize namin na, sa mundo ng medisina, kahit ano maaaring mangyari. Hindi lahat ng procedures nagiging successful. Hindi lahat ng may slightly sakit gumagaling. Anytime, pwedeng lumala ang mga pasyente namin, gusto man namin o hindi.

Namatay si kuya makaraan ang ilang araw. Nabalitaan ko na lang sa facebook. Ayos no? Facebook na ang lugay para sa exchange of information. Nagpost ng status update ang isa sa mga kaibigan ko. Sad daw siya para kay kuya followed by dot dot dot. Tinawagan ko agad ang kagroup ko. Masama na ang kutob ko that time. Tinanong ko kung napano na si kuya. Wala na daw. Sumakabilang buhay si kuya around 8 am that day. In shock pa din ang family pero coping naman daw sila. Ang wife lang ang medyo nakakatakot. Sa buong stay ni kuya sa ICU, once lang siya pumasok sa loob para makita si kuya. Hindi daw niya kasi kayang makita ang itsura nitong ganoon.

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Noong namatay si Cory, nalungkot ako. Noong namatay si kuya, nalungkot din ako. I realized na when it comes to death, hindi ka ever magiging ready kahit gaano mo pa ito i-anticipate. Hindi mo kayang takasan ang lungkot at pagdadalamhati, matagal man o panandalian mo lang nakilala ang namatay.

Bukas ililibing na si Cory. Wala kaming pasok. Sabay nito ililibing ang huling yugto sa kasaysayan ng EDSA, ang mga alaala ng minsang pagkakaisa ng mga Pilipino, mapaadministrason man o oposisyon, sa ngalan ng bayan, sa pamumuno ng isang simpleng maybahay.

Si kuya, malamang nakaburol somewhere malapit sa kanila. Sana'y nasa mas mabuti siyang lugar ngayon. Siguro magkasama sila ni Tita Cory, nanonood, nagbabantay. Naway nasa mabuti na silang kalagayan ngayon, walang sakit at masigla.

Virgin Labfest 5

2009-07-10T08:58:00.000-07:00

Since ngayon lang ako nagkaroon gn oras para makapagblog, I'll just jot down some things about this year's Virgin Labfest. Actually, I went to Gibbs' Blog first to check if hindi pa tapos yung deadline sa contest, e I found out na matatapos na siya in a few minutes, so hindi na pwede humabol. Hehe, sayang. Hehe. As if naman mananalo ako. =)

Anyway, I was able to catch all of the plays they presented at this year's labfest. Kasama ko si MH na nanood. Nagenjoy naman siya.

As usual merong maganda at merong mas maganda. The best for me yung Isang Araw sa Karnabal. Wala lang, it helped siguro na inis na inis ako sa play that came before it, dahil napagod ako sa kuwento at sa mga characters, kaya by the time the it was about to start, ang baba na ng expectation and energy level ko. So when Skyx Labatilla and Paolo 'O Hara went on stage and started their repartee, I was surprisingly engrossed. Parang nabuhayan ako, at nagkalakas to sit through one more performance for the night. That was Friday.

Thursday, Boy Gel ang Gelpren ni Mommy was the one that sticked out in my mind. It was fun to see a production tackling homosexuality on a different light. For the past few years, most plays were about gays and their failed relationship or gays as superheroes. Buti ngayon merong play na nagprepresent ng conflict faced by some homosexual couples: parenthood. Kudos to the all-female ensemble for pulling off a great performance.

Doc Resurrecion: Gagamutin Ang Bayan, for me was the runaway winner in this year's Virgin Labfest. Yeah, kahit hindi ito contest. Maganda ang narrative, very precise ang execution ng mga actors and very griping yung manner ng pag-unfold ng events. I remember leaving the theater with a lingering emotion brought forth by the story. This happened on Wednesday

Tuesday night, Salise was one of MH's favorite play. Ako din. Tawa kami ng tawa dito. Tungkol ito sa laptop na nasalise.. sa soap opera writer at sa chupaan.. Hehe. I hope they do include this when they do a repeat performance next year.

Last but not the least, Ang Huling Lektyur ni Misis Reyes, which is part of the opening salvo at this year's labfest, was the only play wherein I can recall a character's line: "Dissonance". She reminds me of a mentor back in high school. The kind of teacher which can be easily distracted, often confused and sometimes a bit lost while delivering their lecture. She was a bundle of joy in front of the stage, brimming with energy and, well, dissonance. It was my favorite word for the week. Now, I can still hear her pronounce the word like a terrible tinitus. I love it. Hehe

Hopefully next year, I'll still have time to watch Virgin Labfest 6. More power to the organizers and the actors. Mabuhay ang Teatrong Pilipino.

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Some things I noticed during the entire run of the labfest:
1. "Putang ina" ang paboritong mura ng mga playwright.
2. Madaming nanonood ng libre.
3. Bawal mag-CR. Dahil baka pagbalik mo, may iba ng nakaupo sa kinauupuan mo before.
4. Walang whole night na gay-themed plays.

300. San Lazaro

2009-07-10T05:17:00.000-07:00

This is my 300th entry and the longest I've ever done in several months. =)

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Ang San Lazaro Hospital ang isa sa pinakatanyag at kinatatakutang rotation sa buong clerkship. Madumi. Mabaho. Sangkatutak ang pasyente. Nakakahawang sakit. May nananakawan. May nararape. Iyan ang lagi naming naririnig sa mga upper batch. Natural, matatakot ka kapag narinig mo ang mga descriptions na iyon. So the day before my rotation sa San Lazaro, takot na takot na takot na takot na ako.

UST ang laging first sa duty pagdating sa San Lazaro. Sa unang araw nila inaannounce kung sino ang 24-hr duty sa araw na iyon. Alphabetical ang hati. That day, natatakot ako na baka alphabetical nga, pero sa dulo ang simula ng duty. Luckily, walang topak ang secretary that time, hindi ako nagduty that day. Siyempre takot pa din ako. Hindi pa ako nakakapag-insert ng IV sa buhay na tao. Sa dummy lang kami nagpractice dati. Hindi pa din ako nakapaglagay ng NGT tube, ng Foley Cath. Hindi pa din ako nakakapag-venipuncture sa live subject. I'm scared.

UST San Lazaro Group July 1-8, 2009

So there I was, sitting inside the room, waiting for the orientation to finish so that malalaman ko na ang aking duty. First day I was assigned sa adolescent ward. First and foremost, ang San Lazaro Hospital ay divided sa iba't-ibang pavillion. Ang Pavillion 2 and 8 which is the 4th fl. ay for pediatric patients. Sa 2 nilalagay ang mga batang nagkasakit dahil sa vectors (like dengue, leptospirosis, tetanus). Sa 8 naman nakalagay ang mga patients na hindi vector-borne ang sakit like diarrhea, pneumonia, etc.

Ang Pavillion 3 and 6 naman ang nasa 3rd floor. Adolescent ward ang 3. Dito nakapirmi ang mga pasyente na may edad 12 hangang 18 yrs. and 364 days old. Sa Pavillion 7 naman ang mga Philhealth patients. Ang Pavillion 4 and 6 naman ang nasa 2nd floor ng gusali. Nandirito ang mga Adult patients. Hiniwalay ang mga lalake sa babae. Sa Pavillion 4 ang mga babae habang sa 6 naman ang mga lalake.

Sa ground floor matatagpuan ang out patient department, emergency room, laboratories and offices. Nakaseparate naman ang Pavillion X, Bahay Lingap, H1N1 area at HL4. Out of the 4, sa Pavillion X lang kami may rotation. Dito nakalagay ang mga pasyente na may malubhang TB. Sa Bahay Lingap at HL4 naman ang HIV patients, depende sa condition nila. Bawal kami pumunta doon dahil mandate daw ng school namin iyon. Kung ako ang tatanungin, gusto ko sana may rotation doon. Bakit? Well, gusto ko makita yung mga cases na hindi mo naman makikita lagi. Sabi nga sa med school, patients are the best teachers in the world. Hindi mapapalitan ng mga libro ang mga actual patients. Paano kung may pumuntang pasyente sa akin in the future na may ganoong condition, paano ko agad maaalala na iyon pala yung sakit niya kung during training e hindi naman ako naexpose sa ganoon.

All smiles on my first day at San Lazaro

Anyway, so 1st day ko, sa adolescent ward ako na-assign. Ok naman, pagtapak namin sa 3rd floor, binati kami agad ng nurse on duty ng "..good morning doc, kayo duty dito today? Eto yung mga eextractan...", sabay abot ng isang box na punong-puno ng request at test tubes. Mga 40+ siguro yung laman nung box na iyon. Buti 4 kami that time, so we divided it equally among us. Unang extraction ko, nanginginig pa ang mga kamay ko. Siyempre poker face lang. May mga moments na namimiss ko ang vein, lalo sa sa mga patients na medyo horizontally challenged o kaya talagang walang visible na ugat. Pinagagana ko na lang ang aking imagination based sa previous course ko in anatomy. Kapag hindi ko pa rin nagawa, refer to co-clerk. Kapag hindi pa din namin magawa, refer to nurse or resident on duty, pero siyempre we try our best to get it at first try, alam naman naming masakit ang bawat tusok ng karayom e. At the end of the day, feeling ko pro na ako sa venipuncture.

Charting, one of our duties sa hospital. Rubi showing us how to do it properly.

2nd day ko, sa adult ward ako na-assign. As usual, puro skills kami, IV insertions, blood extractions at NGT placement. Unang NGT or nasogastric tube placement ko e sa isang TB meningitis patient na uncooperative. Since hindi siya nagfofollow ng commands, I had to think of a way on how to make the patient swallow para pumasok ng dire-direcho ang NGT. Solution? Water. I asked my co-clerk to place a few drops of water sa mouth ng pt. just enough to stimulate her to swallow. Few drops lang naman, hindi pwedeng madami at baka mag-aspirate. It worked naman. I was kinda apprehensive to try it at first kasi siyempre, sa UST laging assist lang kami or observe. At that moment I was doing the procedure on my own. After successfully placing the tube, I was beaming from ear to ear. Feeling ko doctor na ako. Hehe.

Rabies Isolation Room. Each floor has one of these. Scary no? Wala kaming rabies patients during our entire stay at San Lazaro. Walang ganito sa UST. Wala din atang ganito sa St. Lukes at Medical City.

3rd day I was assigned sa TB Ward. The dreaded Pavillion X. Actually, all the bad publicity ng San Lazaro stems from the fact na may narape na student doon years ago. UST Med student daw, assigned sa TB ward sa gabi, narape ng patient. Iyon ang kuwento. Totoo naman daw according to the consultants pero years back na iyon. Now, naassign ang mga girls doon pero hanggang day duty lang. Kapag gabi, laging lalake ang nakadestino doon. So kapag ikaw lang ang kaisa-isang lalake sa grupo niyo kapag night duty, huwag ka ng umasang malalagay ka pa sa adult or pedia or adolescent ward. Pavillion X ka na automatically.

Necessary na nakamask ka kapag nasa wards, especially Pavillion X. During lunchbreaks lang kami nagtatanggal ng mask while in the premises of the hospital. This was shot during one of those rare occassions hehe.

Unang araw ko sa Pavillion X, nakadouble ordinary mask ako coupled with an N95 mask. Ganoon ako kaparanoid. At the end of the day, I realized na useless din ito dahil sa dami ng active TB patients na pinauuwi namin at hindi inaadmit, you'll never know who among the people you meet in the street ang may active TB. Doon ko lang nalaman na mga may active TB lang at naghihingalo ang napapasok sa ward na iyon. Hindi porket aktibo ang sakit mo sa baga e automatically pasok ka na. Since libre naman ang gamot ng TB, ang mga hindi nangangailangan ng oxygen mask at medical supervision ay hindi inaadmit. Siguro more than 20 patients ang tinurndown namin from being admitted kasi pwede naman silang gamutin sa kani-kanilang bahay.

Ang Pavillion X ay may certain smell. Hindi ko madescribe, of all the things na hindi maayos sa Pavillion 10, ang smell ng lugar ang hindi ko maintindihan. Parang decaying matter na hindi ko maexplain ang amoy doon. May area na madidilim din kaya nakakatakot sa gabi. Iniisip ko lang na ganoon, hindi ko talaga alam kung paano sa TB ward sa gabi, dahil awa ng diyos, hindi ako na-aassign doon in my two days of night duty sa San Lazaro. Maybe effective ang 'The Secret', o kaya yung mga dasal ko. Hehehe.

Sa lahat ng ward, Pavillion X lang din ang nakikipagunahan sa pedia ng may pinakamadaming pasyente. Parang minuminuto may pasyenteng dadating para maiadmit. Dito mo din makikita kung gaano ka kulang sa facilities ang ospital. Tatluhan sa isang kama. Minsan kapag sinuswerte ka at may nadischarge, magiging dalawa na lang kayo sharing the same bed. Imagine yourself being sick and sharing the same bed with another sick person. Di ba diyahe? E yung patients doon wala namang choice.

4th day duty ako. Sa umaga TB ward ako. Pagdating ng lunch time, sa Pedia ward ako nilagay. Good luck sa akin. I hate sick kids. I hated them even more after that night. I think being a kid is the stupidest stage in a person's evolution into an adult. Bakit? Simple. Let's take IV insertion as an example. In an adult or adolsecent, kapag lalagyan mo ng IV iyan, iiyak, uungol, titingin sa side o kaya magwiwince in pain. Pero, hindi nila igagalaw ang kamay para hindi madislodge ang needle at hindi na maulit ang insertion, kasi nga masakit. Sa mga babies at bata, once tusukin mo, iiyak, uungol, titingin sa side, magwiwince in pain at, eto, iwawagayway ang arms. Nakakainis. Ang hirap pa naman makahanap ng ugat sa bata! Ang liliit nila and pwerless, pero kapag IV insertions, kailangan ng sangdamakmak na nursing aides para lang mahawakan sila ng mabuti at malagyan ng IV.

Ang hindi ko pa matake sa bata e yung kanilang pag-iyak. Parang walang ceiling volume ang mga ito. Palakas ng palakas. Para bang ito ang special powers nila para maward off ang mga tutusok sa kanila.

I remember my duty that night, talagang pagod na pagod ako. Hindi lang ako duty sa pedia, pati ER ako din. Pinagambulance pa kami ng isang pasyente para pumunta sa kabilang ospital para sa isang procedure. Sa 4th floor mga lampas 100 ang pasyente ko. Mag-isa akong clerk at isa din lang ang residente ko. sa 4 na kuwarto sa Pavillion 2 pa lang 60 plus na ang pasyente, 3 sa bawat kama. Ok lang naman siguro iyon, mga bata, wala pang arte sa katawan. Usually friends pa sila ng bedmate nila. Yung 2 ngang babae doon, pareho ng hairstyle kinaumagahan nung chincek ko sila. Hehe.

Tinie, Tere and I with some of our co-clerks from SLU (Baguio) and Fatima (Valenzuela)

Noong gabing iyon, ER din ako. Pinababa ako dahil ang daming pasyente sa ER, hindi kaya ng isa. On call ako that time sa pedia. Sa ER ko narealize na madami pa lang nakakagat ng ahas sa Manila. I mean, you'd think na sa probinsiya madaming ahas, pagdating sa city wala masyado unless nag-aalaga ka ng ahas. Pero, wow, as in mga 10 ata yung inadmit namin for 24-hr observation dahil sa snake bite. Most of them naglalakad sa kalsada ng matapakan nila yung ahas at kinagat sila. Madami ding pumupunta sa ER, duguan dahil kinagat ng aso. Meron ding kigata ng pusa at, well, daga.

Most of those na inadmit namin e mga dengue patients. Yung tipong nilagnat ng ilang araw tapos gumaling tapos biglang dinugo ang ilong o kaya sumakit ang tiyan at nagsuka, tapos mababa ang platelet. Meron ding nasa medyo delikadong stage ng dengue, yung may skin rashes tapos dinudugo ang ilong at gilagid.

5th day ko, from duty status, pedia pa din ako. Noong umaga, kinunan ko ng vital signs on my own ang lahat ng dengue patients ko. Pagkatapos, pagod na pagod na ako. 12 nn ang uwian and since dumating na ang mga kasama ko ng 9 am, tumunganga na lang ako. Pagdating ng 12 nn, umuwi lang ako para magbihis at umalis para manood ng Ice Age at Transformers with MH. Guess what happened. Tulog ako sa Ice Age. Tulog din ako sa Transformers. Hehehe. Enjoy pa din naman kahit ganoon, huwag lang ako tatanungin kung anong nangyari sa Ice Age dahil hindi ko talaga alam.

6th day sa Pedia pa din ako. Morning greeting namin e isang code. Tetanus patient. Declared dead after 20 minutes of CPR. I guess, one thing that contributed to it was the fact na wala kaming maayos na ambubag sa floor na iyon. Wala din defibrillator. Government hospital talaga ang dating, kung hindi sira, kulang sa gamit. May tatlong ambubag ang pedia ward, niiisa walang gumagana. Wala ding mahiraman sa ibang floor dahil, well, sira din sila. Ang kaisa-isang defibrillator na nakita ko sa ospital e yung nasa ER. Pero kahit iyon, hindi ko ever nakitang ginamit. Kahit may nagcode sa ER when I was there, hindi siya ever ginamit. Hindi ko alam kung hindi lang marunong gumamit iyong mga nandoon o kaya'y talagang sira lang siya. I'd like to think of the latter na lang. Minsan, naisip ko, sana may maospital na government official doon, tapos maadmit, at magcode, para marealize niya na sana noong healthy siya e naalala niyang lagyan ng maayos na gamit ang public hospital. Oh well, impossibleng may maospital na government official doon, dahil may pera naman sila para pumunta sa private hospital.

Anyway, 7th day ko was spent sa ER. Benign. As in hindi siya tulad ng ER duty sa gabi na tipong palengke sa dami ng pasyente. Since bukas ang OPD walang mga pumupunta sa ER ng umaga unless for admission. So there, sittting pretty kami. Share share sa pasyente kapag may dumating unlike kapag night duty share share ang mga pasyente sa nag-iisang clerk. Hehe.

8th and last day sa San Lazaro, I was assigned sa OPD. Patients galore. Ang pinakanagstick sa akin e yung dalawang magkapatid na nag-aaway ng biglang kagatin sila pareho ng alagang aso. Yung babae sa mukha kinagat, yung lalake sa arms. I think mas kumampi yung aso sa guy kasi yung sa babae mas grabe yung kagat niya e. When I first saw them akala ko e mag-asawa sila. Iyon pala magkapatid. Hehe.

That night I was assigned again sa ER. This time 2 kaming clerk. Pero kahit ganoon, umulan pa din ng pasyente. E nagkataong may sakit pa ang kasama ko sa duty. May times na natutulog siya habang nakaupo ng walang back rest. O di ba? May skill ang lola mo. I remember doc calling waking her up while we were putting IV on a kid na sobrang lakas. Kami pa ang nahiya kung gigisingin siya or not. In the end, we woke her up kasi, grabe, ang lakas pumiglas nung bata. Gusto ko na ngang i-body slam at dagan para lang tumahimik at maghold still ng malagyan na ng IV e hehehe.

The most challenging patient na lagyan ng IV arrived sa ER that night of all nights. 28 year old, cerebral palsy patient na mentally retarded at may diarrhea. Sobrang dehydrated niya kaya we opted to admit the patient. Noong lalagyan na ng IV, ginapos namin siya sa wheelchair, with matching hawak sa dalawang kamay, tig-isa kami ng aide. Pagtusok pa lang ng needle, ayun, kinalmot niya kami with his killer fingernails. Nasugat kami ni kuya at siyempre nadislodge ang needle. 2nd try, napaghandaan na namin ang kanyang naghahabaang kuko, at successfully namin siyang nalagyan ng IV. On the way up, nakagapos pa din siya. Pagdating sa adult ward, nagpumiglas ang patient, and out of the blue, nakawala sa pagkakagapos. Guess what he did. He pulled the IV from his hand. Ganoon siya kalakas. Blood spurted out of the wound, and hindi ako ready that time. Wala akong dalang cotton to apply to the area. Napatakbo pa ako sa nurse station to get one. By the time I went back, ayon, basa na ng dugo ang arm ng patient.

We were able to IV him again that night. This time, hinga na namin sa sa kama, nakagapos na ng mahigpit. We placed the IV in a way na babaliin muna niya ang arms niya bago niya ito mahatak. Hopefully, in place pa din siya as of this writing.

My last night at San Lazaro was kinda bittersweet. I realized na I enjoyed my stay there and I learned a lot. Ngayon addict na ako sa IV insertion at venipuncture. Pagbalik ko nga sa UST, parang vampire ako in lust for blood. I kept on looking at people's hands and arms looking for blood vessels, admiring those na magandang saksakan ng needle and wishing those who don't get admitted. Dito sa UST, interns ang gumagawa ng insertion sa, siguro mga internship pa bago ako makapagkabit ulit.

I also miss the 8 am call time and the 4 pm uwian on regular days. Back to 7 am na naman kami dito sa UST. Tapos 5 pm ang uwian kung walang errands. Hindi naman nasusunod ito palagi. Namimiss ko din yung mga residents na hindi kami sinisigawan at trinatrato kami bilang colleagues. Namimiss ko yung feeling na pag-uwi mo, pagod ka pero alam mong may importante kang ginawa that day unlike dito, halos uulanin ka sa paperwork, paperwork and more paperwork. Pag-uwi mo pagod ka, pero hindi ka naman masaya dahil sa buong araw mo sa hospital nagrun ka lang ng errands, nasabon ng residente at gumawa ng paperwork again. Hindi ko naman nilalahat ang mga residents. Madami din namang mga mababait na nagtuturo sa amin, pero siyempre, nagstick pa din sa akin yung mga bad experience ko dito sa UST.

Right now, enjoy naman sa ENT. Light ang work. Nakakapanibago pero masaya naman. In the mababaw side of things, may aircon kami dito. Hehe. Naappreciate ko ang importance ng aircon after coming from San Lazaro. Ang sarap magwork sa malamig at well ventialted area hehe. Hindi malagkit ang feeling.

I guess it'll take some time bago ko maget over ang San Lazaro experience. Naweweirdohan nga sa amin ang mga naunang grupo sa amin na dumaan na sa San Lazaro. Kami lang daw ang bumalik sa UST ng masaya at namimiss yung lugar. I went there with the idea na hindi ko siya magugustuhan but I came home with the thought of going back there in the future.

The expression on Tinie's face says it all: We miss San Lazaro!

How to do an Autopsy

2009-07-09T19:39:00.001-07:00

I've always wanted to write something about my autopsy experience ever since I finished my rotation at Camp Crame. It was only now that I've had the time to make a blog about it. Just to get it out of my system, I guess I'll just explain how they do the procedure.

1. Scan the victim. Look for any congenital
malformations, injuries or defects. Take note of any tattoo or piercings.

2. Measure. Using a tape measure, measure the height of the patient by placing the tape at specific landmarks like the medial malleoli upto the vertex. Measure visible injuries. Take note of the length, width and distance of the injury from the anatomic midline of te body or the extremity. Be sure to describe the injury properly in terms of hematoma, ecchymosis, petechiae, punctured, lacerated, incised or abraded wound. Do not interchange one from the other. Autopsy records are legal documents that can be used in litigation so proper documentation is important.

3. Inspection of internal organs. Start from cephalic area going caudal. In deaths due to unknown cause, the internal organs are weighed one by one. In incidents wherein the cause of death known, there is no need to do the weighing.

From my experience, they usually make a coronal incision in the scalp, usually in the vertex, extending to both ears. The skull is observed for any fractures. Afterwards, the superior pole of yhe skull is sawed of to allow visual inspection of the brain. The condition of the gyri as well as the sulci and meninges are noted. Hemorrhage can usually be determined by the presence of blood clots in the surface of the brain parenchyma.

The brain is then removed from the cavity in order to be able to see the posterior wall of the skull.

A Y-incision from the chest extending into the symphysis pubis is made to expose the pleural and peritoneal cavity. The organs are first observed in their location. Any visible injury noted. Then they are subsequently removed one by one for more closer scrutiny.

After examination, the brain is returned to the skull while the solid internal organs are chopped ino smaller pieces and placed in the peritoneal cavity. The bodies are then shipped back to the morgue. The morgue will be responsible for disposig the internal organs and sewing up the bodies.

The three autopsies i attended were either due to motor vehicular accidents or gunshot. I'll never forget the sound of the saw used in opening the skull as well as the smell inside the autopsy room. It smells like the meat shop inside old public markets.

Good Burger

2009-06-29T00:29:00.001-07:00

The best thing about outside rotations is that you could go on a food trip during lunch breaks.

Yesterday we went to Tinie's cousin's resto at Maginhawa St. near UP Diliman. Good Burger. They serve chicken or veggie burgers in different mouthwatering combinations. Super affordable pa. Good burger (1/4 lbs. patty$ costs around 55-90 bucks, Better burgers (1/2 lbs. patty) cost 70-100 bucks and Best burgers (1 lbs. patty) costs 90-120 bucks. Not bad!

Libre ni Tinie ang fries and drinks so, solb talaga :-)

I had the Silly burger (chilly burger). Maanghang siya but nothing special. I kinda liked Allain's Persian burger more, I swapped half of mine hehe. Justine's Margarita burger is ok too as well as Cai's Three cheese burger.

Just the thought of burger's making me hungry!

Branches:
Sikatuna: 162 Maginhawa St. 435 4663
Greenhills: One Kennedy Place, Annapolis cor. Ortigas Greenhills
Pasig: 10 East Capitol Drive, Brgy. Kapitolyo Pasig
Pasig: 106 E. Rodriguez Jr. Ave. Brgy. Ugong C5 Pasig

Camp Crame

2009-06-28T17:54:00.001-07:00

I'm making this entry while stuck in heavy traffic. We're on our way to Camp Crame, our homebase til June 30. Ok naman siya, malinis, peaceful, pero ang mga patients namin re not the usual sick patients. Most, if not all of them, ay victim ng crime.

First Patient

Alleged rape victim. Minor yung girl. Minor din yung offender. Nakipaginuman sa mga guys. Si Gran Ma(tador) ang tinira ng mga loko. 4x!!! Later on nakita na lang nung friend nung girl sa damuhan na nakapatong yung isa sa mga guys sa girl, both of them naked!!! Hay buhay. Ayun, nakulomg yung guy, yung babae pinaexam sa amin sa Crame.

Intact hymen but with congestions within the periphery of the vagina. Based on the new Rape Act, di naman na kailangan mapenetrate ang hymen para maconsider na rape ang incident. Basta may ipask ka doon, daliri man o pencil, basically kahit ano na against the girl's wishes e, pwede ka ng makasuhan ng rape.

Lesson learned: hindi mapagkakatiwalaan si Gran Ma!

Second "Patient"

"Patient" kasi patay na siya. Autopsy of a motor vehicular accident victim. Guy was driving a Honda Civic, on his way home, when out of nowhere, a drunk alleged DLSU prof, driving a Ford Escape rammed into the right side of the car.

"Patient" sustained a fractured arm and pelvis, subarachnoid hemorrhage, subdural hemorrhage, ruptured aorta, and hemothorax. "Patient" was 30, married and has a 7 yr. old child.

According to the victim's family, the family of the driver tried to negotiate with them, but they declined.

Hinding-hindi ko makaklimutan ang unang autopsy na ito. My first ever autopsy. It was gruesome. It's like going to the butcher. The utensils were unlike those we used in the operating room. Knife na sobrang matalim at hack saw talaga ang gamit namin. Kung ako ang relative ng victim tapos I'd be required to watch the procedure, I'd be mortified!

The good thing about the autopsy naman is that you get to apply the reasoning we learned in legal medicine. We also get to see fresh specimen, the organs are not dry and rotting like those of the cadavers we used in med school. All in all it was a great learning experience.

Lesson learned: Matibay ang Ford Escape! Mismong sa mom ng victim nangaling yan. Wasak daw ang Honda Civic while the Ford Escape was still intact after the incident. Alam nila na matibay talaga ang Ford, account manager bg Ford ang victim e.

Third Patient

Domestic violence. Husband is a cop who's assigned at the building beside ours. Wife is a midwife working at a hospital in Ortigas. Husband punched wife and tried to ran her over with his motorbike.

Wife's scared of reportig her husband. She's terrified of being seen inside the clinic for her husband might find out that she's filing a case against him. We were on a lookout yesterday while she's under our care. There was a time na nagpanic kami since the patient started complaining of headache. Buti it wasn't anything serious, thank God.

Lesson learned: Learn self-defense? Don't get married? I don't know.

Hopefuly all our patients get the justice that's rightfully theirs.

I am sick and some other stuff

2009-06-09T05:29:00.000-07:00

May sipon, ubo at lagnat ako ngayon. Trankaso sa tagalog, Flu sa ingles. Unang beses kong umabsent ngayon. Kaninang umaga, pagising, nilalagnat na ako, barado ang ilong at mabigat ang ulo. Nagdecide ako na huwag ng pumasok. Tinext ko ang groupmates ko at nagendorse ng trabaho. Mahirap ding umabsent sa surgery, lalo na kung ang pasyente mo ay for operation that day. Buti na lang bukas pa yung sa akin. Kaso, sa condition ko ngayon, feeling ko hindi din ako papasok bukas. Mahirap na, baka makahawa pa ako ng iba, o kaya e mahawa pa ako ng mas opportunistic diseases habang immunocompromised ako sa flu na ito. May multidrug resistant staphylocauccus infection pa naman kami sa 3rd floor ngayon, malapit sa surgery lounge kung saan kami nagstastay. Yung patients pa namin ngayon e mga cancer patients, yung iba nagtatake ng chemodrugs, kaya immunocompromised sila, so naisip ko na mas lalong dapat umiwas muna ako sa pagpasok.

Natatakot lang akong matambakan ng make-ups. Hindi pa naman ako nagpacheck-up sa health service. I need a medical certificate para maging excused absence ito, pero naman, nanghihina na nga ako, eeffort pa akong pumunta ng UST?! Bahala na, gamitan ko na lang ng charms hahaha.

Ang boring pala ng life kung wala kang ginagawa bigla. I mean, araw-araw akong nasa hospital. Bawat hakbang na gawin ko may purpose: pumunta sa pasyente, mag-run ng labs, mag-code. Ngayong may sakit ako at nasa bahay, biglang wala. Bedridden. Natutulog lang ako. Kung hindi naman e nakahiga lang. Umaalis lang ako ng kama para mag-CR o kumain o ka'y magpabili ng pagkain. Nalulunod na ako sa tubig at pineapple juice. Gusto kong magkape, hindi naman pwede. Kanina, naglaro na lang ako ng Nintendo DS. Hindi kasi ako makatulog. Kung kailan naman makakatulog ako, tatawag ang mga kaklase ko sa ospital, magtatanong about my patient.

Heto, ngayon, nagresearch ako about H1N1. Wala lang. Sa dami ng mga taong nagpupunta sa ospital compainging of fever, etc. baka mamaya kasi meron na ako nito. According to my research, parang regular flu lang naman pala ang H1N1. Bedrest and proper hydration lang ang kailangan. Hopefully this thing I got is not H1N1. Baka masama ako sa statistics e hehehe.

-0-

Anyway, I've been talking with MH about Virgin Labfest. It looks like I will be able to watch the plays from June 23-27. Hindi na ako sa surgery that time. Legal Med na. Good thing about it is that wala silang night duty. Hopefully matuloy kami. May student discount pa kaya this year? Hehe. Since student pa dina ko, regardles of age, I'll buy the student tickets kung meron.

To my brokenhearted friend

2009-05-23T21:12:00.000-07:00

People have a way of disappearing from our lives, one way or another. No matter how you hold on to them, it seems they're determined to slip away from your fingers. Just like a pen or a card or a cellphone, no matter how carefully you hide them, put them in your pocket, if you're destined to lose them, you will. The people in your life will come and go, no matter what. No phone call or email or drama could make them want to stay once they've made up their minds.

This I will tell you my friend, because I once was in your position. Holding on to someone long gone like it's the end of the world is like holding on spilled milk.. Impossible. Carlo always come to mind. Remember him? When I went to Hong Kong a couple of years back, we were still a couple then, I would call him everyday. Just to say hi. Check on how he's doing; how he and his mentor's doing. I would stop by a mall in Causeway Bay, just to use an internet connection in one of those coffeeshops just to send an email, or just to chat with him. When I went home, after a couple of months, Carlo hooked up with Mentor, and I was left with nothing, I learned that they started 'dating' when I was away. So after that, I realized that no amount of text or calls or e-mials would have changed the way things turned out to be. Don't get me wrong, I'm not telling you not to try and fight for your partner, or chase after him. I'm just saying that once you've reached that point where everything's said and done, learn to stop. Learn to move on. Because you can hold on to them for the rest of your life, while they hold on to someone else.

Learn to look at it as an opportunity for you to meet other people. I said learn because I know it will be hard to will yourself up and look beyond the person you so dearly love or loved. Yes it's not always a fun process, but hey, you just might meet someone better. Way better than the one you're crying over now.

Poeple will come and go, my friend. Remember that. Enjoy the moments, cherish the happiness and forget the loneliness.

Hugs.

Fragmented Angelita

2009-05-20T06:40:00.002-07:00

Dear Angelita,

It's been a week since the last time I saw you. You were lying in your bed at the MICU. The tubes have been removed. Only the JV catheter's in place. There's a kind of peace in your face. Your beautiful face.

-0-

You remind me of my mom when she was first brought to the ICU a year go. She looked terrible. Her face was swollen from all the beating she took. She's got dried blood in her hair and bruises all over her body just like yours. There were tubes connected to her all over. Just like yours. Yes, just like yours.

-0-

I feel for your daughter. I know how she must be feeling the night everything went wrong. Did you remember that night? It was my first day at neurosurgery. It was also my first duty in that rotation. Tinie had a new admission that day. The patient's kinda in a bad shape so she was assigned at bedside. Cay was busy doing rounds. I was basically helping both of them. I remember the hour before you became toxic. I was the one who took your vital signs. Your BP that time was 110/80 mmHg. It was within the normal range. You didn't speak to me when I said hi. Your daughter was at your side, offering you a drink. I chatted with her for some time then went on my way. I didn't have any inkling of what was in store for all of us that night.

-0-

I remember receiving a call from Cay an hour later. Your BP's going down after she took it at three intervals. She was panicking. I called the intern. we were at your bedside that time. You were complaining of stomach pain. We were considering MI, since it was noted at your chart. Possible MI. I referred you to the Med resident on duty. I remember vividly how it all happened. From a stable patient, you've become someone in need of 6 bags of blood. We were still clueless at what's happening to you.

-0-

Your ECG's were fine, we've placed all sorts of stabilizers so that you're BP will go up. The residents were thinking of having a CT scan done to determine where you're bleeding. I went back to the lab to get more blood. I remember seeing the sky turn light blue as I walk back and forth from one building to another.

-0-

I remember that morning at the CT scan. The first time I saw melena. My head's floating in the air that morning. I didn't get any sleep and you were toxic. Instead of bringing you to the ward, we brought you to the MICU. I endorsed you to our alternates and then I went home.

-0-

I remember the day we referred you to psychiatry. You told your attending physician that you wanted to die. He wrote an order asking that you be evaluated by a psychiatrist. I was the one who interviewed your children as well as your sister. I even interviewed your husband and friends. You were at the ICU that time. You were still bleeding internally.

I visited you at the ICU that same day. You were awake. There were tubes attached to you. You look helpless, but I know it's what's keeping you alive. You were smiling at me. I said hello. You held my hand and told me that you wanted to get well. Remember? You said, " Pagalingin mo ako, I'm very hopeful, galingan mo ha". I didn't kow what to say. I just held your hand tight and smiled back.

That day at the ICU, I felt we formed a bond. You shared your life story with me. You told me about your apo's and how much you missed them. You even promised me a taste of the Pancit Malabon which you cook so very well. You recounted your days as a teacher at Makati. You don't know it that time, but you were a teacher that day to me as well. You taught me about psychiatry and how important it is to know you well, to look beyond you as a patient but as a functional individual, with relationships and value beyond which we at the hospital can just imagine. Yes Angelita, I became a student of yours that day.

-0-

I will never forget the way you held my hand when you told me that you thought I was a snob. You were smiling. You were explaning to your clerk-in-charge how we first met. At the end of your story, you called me charming. Then you smiled. It was the same smile that greeted me when I enetered the MICU. It was the same smile that greeted me your entire stay at the ICU.

-0-

There were times when your name will come up during our conversations. Out of the blue we'd remember how well you were before you took a turn for the worse. There were days when we'd discuss the procedures as well as the labs that were ordered for you. We would discuss the things that should and should've not been done in your case.

-0-

We were the clerks who took your vital signs. The ones who ran your labs and got your blood. We were the ones who pushed your stretcher when the residents requested for a CT scan and endoscopy and RBC tagging. We were the ones who pumped your ambubag as well as suctioned your secretions. Somehow, we can't seem to shake you off of our head. I can't get you off my head.

-0-

I hope you're in a better place right now. I'm writing this to say thank you. Thank you for being a teacher to me. Thank you for sharing with me your life; for inspiring me to do better in the field I've chosen.

Love,

Eugene

Everyday

2009-05-07T08:14:00.000-07:00

I'm now under Neuro/Plastic Surgery rotation. I just had my first duty and boy was it toxic! 2 patients went into code last night. One died early today, the other one's been transferred to the MICU before I went off duty. If you're one of those people who read the tabloid, you might have come across one of our patients in the front page last May 6.

Anyway, it's been one hell of a duty. There's basically 3 of us in a group. We usually do 'deckings' which means that we divide the number of hours we're in duty between the three of us. So if we're on duty from 7 pm to 7 am, 12 hours, we divide the 12 hours equally. We go on 'duty' each night for 4 hours although we're at the hospital from 7pm to 7 am. The remaining hours, we either sleep or do paperworks, or if if there are admissions for the night, we do the admissions. Anyway, last night, Tinie had the most toxic patient ever. The patient is on 'q30' (vital signs every 30 minutes, togethr with urine output). It was a really complicated set-up. She was at bedside the entire time. I was there helping her out since I'm not that toxic. Cay and I decided to split the duty hours into 2 instead of 3. She takes the first half, I take the last 6 hours. In the early part of the night, one of the patient's bp started going down. Way below the normal. That brings the total number of toxic patients to two. Cay was elevated into a bedside clerk when the patient became q15 (vitals every 15 minutes). I then took Cay's remaining sked.

When Cay's pt.'s condition took a turn for the worse, 'q'-ing was suspended. I was then assigned to facilitate emergency labs and x-rays. I was basically running from one building to another, bringing blood samples, requesting packed RBC's and bringing them to the ICU. It was really, really tiring. After several drugs and transfusions, pt's bp was still going down. We're sure there must be bleeding somewhere. Ancillary procedures were ordered. CT scan didn't show any abdominal aneurysm. It was only during the time when we were transferring the pt. from the CT scan table to the stretcher that we noticed that there's blood in the sheets as well as a foul-smelling odor. Turns out pt. has melena (black, tarry stool, representative of upper gastrointestinal bleeding). As of this moment, when I asked for an update, pt's still at the ICU, condition is still not stable.

-0-

Lesson learned that night:

1. I now know what Melena is. I'll never forget how it smells and how it looks like. Iba talaga when you see it first hand compared to just reading what it is sa mga books.

2. Intern-based learning ang clerkship. Imbes na matuto kami from the residents, we basically get our knowledge from the interns. Take for example, last night I was curious on what to do just in case our patient went into code. In our lectures we were taught how to do CPR etc, but then it was just described to us. In the actual setting, like in Tinie's pt., he has tubes in his face and the bedrest was elevated. I don't know, if and when the patient goes into cardiac arrest, 1.) Should we remove the tubes and lower the bedrest before starting CPR? 2.) Should we leave the tubes in place, just lower the bedrest and start CPR? These are valid questions. So I told the medicine resident on duty that I have questions. His reply? "Not now, I'm toxic". Would you believe that? I then went to our intern. He told me to leave the tubes in place and just lower the bed rest and start CPR.

During the orientation, we were encouraged by the consultants to ask questions when we don't know what to do. Better safe than sorry lalo na now that we're handling real people. Nakakainis lang na napapansin namin, especially medicine residents, na tipong they are allergic to referrals or questions from us. Dahil ba added work ito? Siguro if they're getting paid for each referral they won't feel the same way, kasi yayaman sila sa kakarefer naming mga nasa surgery rotation. I've yet to meet a medicine resident who would welcome referrals from clerks without smirking, shouting or making rude comments. Thank God there are interns who help us out.

Basically, I get the point that we are really in the bottom of the food chain when it comes to the field of medicine. Even lower than the secretaries and the janitors. I don't mind at all, doing all the things we're required to do. It's just that nakakabother lang yung mga power trippers na secretaries as well as nurses. Anyway, tinitiis ko na lang lahat ng mga lait and all just for my patients. Really, kapag makipagtalo ako sa residente, intern, nurse or secretary, ang totoong talo e yung patient ko. It's either he won't get the treatment that he needs o kaya matatagalan ang procedure or mga requests. In medicine, time is gold talaga, mas mabilis mafacilitate ang mga requests and procedure, the better. Kung makipagtalo pa ako, lalo lang tatagal ang mga bagay-bagay, baka mamatay pa ang pasyente. Sabi nga ng friend ko, wala namang namamatay sa kahihiyan, so go na lang. Do everything for your patient. At the end of the day, we're basically at the hospital to treat patients. Yung paglunok ko araw-araw ng pride ko, tulong ko na sa mga patiente na naaassign sa akin.

3. Thank God for the storm. Pm duty was cancelled so basically nasa bahay lang ako the entire day. I was in bed the moment I got home from the hospital. I was so tired. Natulog na lang ako. When I woke up in the afternoon, my body was aching all over. Sobrang sedentary na kasi, nagmuscle strain ata ako sa kakatakbo kagabi from the different buildings just to get blood and have the ABG interpreted. Iba ang takbo lalo na when you know that every second counts. Constantly my mind was thinking that I should do every request fast since in distress ang patient ko or ng classmate ko. I'm actually hoping na bukas cancelled pa din ang pasok. Kapag ganoon kasi only those on duty that day are required to go to teh hospital. Sunday pa ako duty ulit so basically bukas, kung cancelled ang pasok, I'll just stay at home and rest.

-0-

I've been amiss these past few weeks on my duty as a son, friend and bf. lagi na lang akong unavailable because of my schedule at the hospital. Lagi din akong pagod. I couldn't even text or reply to text ng mga friends ko. Kahit nga magbasa ng libro hindi ko magawa. I still haven't found the set-up wherein I could accomplish all my obligations. It's kinda frustrating. Pero sa totoo lang right now, all I want to do is be a bum. I miss the times when I'm just surfing the net, watching tv shows I've downloaded on the net, or going out and having coffee. I miss my life wherein I could basically do what I want, when I want it. Yung tipong you don't feel torn between all your obligations. Now kasi I feel like kailangan ko atang hatiin ang katawan ko just to be a son, a friend and a bf. I hope I get to adjust to things in the coming weeks. God help me out.

-0-

Ok, so I'm really having a hard time with clerkship now. What's new? Everyday, I try to find a reason for me to stay in the program. Aside from thinking about the expenses my lolo incurred para maka-med ako, I'm looking for something to inspire me to continue doing what I'm basically doing right now. Kung hindi ko gagawin iyon, siguro nag LOA na ako by now, what with all the bad experiences I've been having since the start of the program.

Anyway, yesterday, my inspiration was my patient's caregiver. She's the wife of my patient. I call her lola (generic term we use to address the elderly). They were suppose to go home na kahapon, but they've encountered some problems with the billing, so they couldn't go home yet. I was on duty last night when I bumped into her while I was doing the rounds. It was around 10 pm na and she was still walking in the hallway. At that time I thought nakauwi na sila. Kinamusta ko si tatay. She informed me nga na they weren't allowed to go home yet since at the last minute may nadagdag sa bill nila. E kaso wala na siyang pera now at napauwi na niya lahat ng gamit nila, like food etc. kaya basically, silang dalawa na lang ni tatay ang nandoon. Gusto na nga niyang umuwi since hindi pa siya nagdidinner. Oh God, lola is like 77 years old na din ata like tatay. Hindi pa siya kumakain that time? I decided to buy her dinner. I gave it to her, and she was happy. Si tatay nakakain naman na since kasama pa siya sa food list ng hospital. I felt giddy inside when I saw the smile on lola's face. I thought ito din siguro yung 'giddy' feeling surgeons have after a succesful operation, or a doctor finding out that their patient is improving under their care. And so I lived to see another day as a clerk sa UST hospital. I might not have directly treated my patients illness, but then I was able to help them out in one way or another.

Ranting Again

2009-04-30T23:57:00.000-07:00

The UST Surgery Department were selling Wolverine tickets the past few weeks. It's for their special screening last night at Trinoma. Fundraising siya for their medical mission this summer. I was suppose to go there with my sister since our resident sold me 2 tickets. I thought it would be a good way to bond with her na din since we seldom get to see each other because of my schedule.

Earlier that day, I gave her the tickets. I told her to be at Trinoma earlier than the screening time so she could reserve good seats for us. 6 pm yung screening. She was there around 4 pm. I didn't imagine na toxic kami kahapon. Nagulat na lang ako when we were called to be at UST earlier than 7 am. Wala palang mga interns. So, we ended up scrubbing in their operations. Ok naman yung mga OR, until my patient's OR was deferred. Mataas kasi yung BP. 150/100 ang highest. He's just 7 years old. Instead of OR, I ended up doing his labs and paperworks. Yesterday, I realized that the hardest thing in clerkship is not the errands or the paper works. It's the referrals. Hindi mo alam kung ano ang itatanong sayo ng mga residente. Since bata pa ang patient, I had to refer him sa pedia. Then pedia referred the patient to pedia nephro. So bagong presentation. Nangarag ako sa mga questions. Bagong labs. Then referred na naman siya sa pedia..Pedia nutrition. Doon ako nadali. At 5 pm, kung kailan uwian na dapat, nagprepresent ako sa resident. The bad news pa, e dinemand niya ang mga paperworks and diet computations by 6 pm the same day. Patay kung patay. I called my sister to tell her na maghanap na lang siya ng papalit sa akin. Sa totoo lang, I was kinda bad trip. I was really looking forward to spending time with her. Ang thing pa e, wala siyang masyadong friends dito. Ang ending? Nanood siya mag-isa. Umuwi siya mag-isa din. I wasn't able to pick her up after the movie.

By 6 pm last night I approached the resident again and informed her that I wouldn't be able to finish the things she wants me to submit. She told me na dapat first thing in the morning meron na siya. By that time start na ang movie. Hay. Bad trip din ako last night dahil by 12, hindi pa ako tapos sa mga referrals, requests and paperworks.. Ang daming labs na kailangan i-carry out. Maghahating gabi na nagrerefer pa ako ng same patient sa radio. Siguro hindi ko pa masyado nahahanda yung sarili ko sa situation na last minute nacacancel ang mga plans mo kapag doctor ka na. Any minute pwede kang tawagan, in the middle of a date or a movie, pwedeng may patient na magcode or mangailan ng labs.

As of the moment my sister is still not talking to me. My patient is still hypertensive. We still don't kow why, but we're getting there. I like to believe that we're ne step closer to finding out why. Hay.

Basically, I'm just ranting. I'm just tired. La lang. Pauwi pa lang ako to get some sleep. Parang hindi holiday. Imbes na magliwaliw, matutulog ako. Duty pa ako bukas. =(

Shop

2009-04-27T06:27:00.000-07:00

Today I learned how to shop. Nope, not the kind of shopping that you do when you’re in the malls or tiangge. Shop, as in shop inside the hospital. Shop for medicines. Shops for things for your patient.

Earlier today my resident informed me that I should start ‘shopping’ for an F14 foley catheter for my patient. I was for a moment, lost. What did he mean by that? Should I buy it for my patient? I went to the nurse station and asked, “Ano pong ibig sabihin ng shop?” The nurse at the counter replied, “ Ah pumunta ka sa semi-pay ward at sa pay hospital, ikutin mo yung mga nurse station, sabihin mo na magshoshop ka ng ganyang bagay.” Then I realized what my task was.

The UST Clinical Division is in short the charity ward of the hospital. It is where our less fortunate kababayans go to when they want to avail cheaper medical services from one of the prestigious medical institutions in the country. Anyway, sometimes the patients really don’t have money for basic things that will be used during operations that the doctors/interns/clerks basically ‘shop’ for them. What happens when you shop?

Well take for example my case. My patient needs a foley catheter. What I did was go to all the nurse’s stations at the different wards to look for foley catheters that have been left unused by previous patients who either expired or got well and got discharged. Nurses usually keep useable items for the sake of those patients in the charity ward. This doesn’t mean that they’ll just hand it over that easily when you ask for them. Some are bitchy and won’t even look at their stash when you inquire about it. Some will really go out of their way to look at all their storage if they have one. After, circling the semi-pay and 2nd and 3rd floor of the pay hospital, I was able to get an unused, sterile foley catheter at the 4th floor. I was ecstatic! Finally my 5 year old patient will get to have his catheter changed!

That happened in the morning. By 6 pm, the catheter is still with the family. They don’t have the money to buy KY jelly, sterile gloves, 10 cc syringe, sterile cotton and betadine. I was again asked to ‘shop’. Our work ends at 5 pm but I don’t mind staying a bit just to help out my patient. I did the rounds again. I ended up having 2 30 cc syringes instead of the 10cc that’s ordered on the chart. I learned that you could also 'swap' things at the nurse's stations. I was able to swap the 2 30 cc syringes at for a 10cc at the medicine ward. A nurse gave me her own KY lube since I couldn’t find it in any of the stations. The doctor provided the gloves and betadine. I bought the sterile cotton at the pharmacy for my patient since I also couldn’t find one when I did my rounds. In the end, we were able to change my patient’s cystostomy tube! Changing it wasn’t that easy, what with the kid thrashing out in pain when we were applying it. But then, after it was in place, he stopped crying. He flashed me his usual smile with matching peace sign. I was happy. Happy that my patient is happy. Happy that I was able to help out my patient and happy that my patient has a new catheter that he could use for a month or so.

Afterwards, just as I promised, I bought him his favorite food: Jollibee Spaghetti. You could just imagine the look in his face. New cystostomy tube + favorite food. Hay. I love my patient. =) They make me want to go to the hospital everyday. Deadma to the ever toxic clerkship.

First Time sa Second Time

2009-04-21T04:25:00.000-07:00

It was my second time sa duty, and boy was it eventful! Madaming nangyaring hinding-hindi ko makakalimutan.

1. Natuto akong umiyak ng nakadilat ang mga mata, na walang luhang tumutulo. Nabastos ka na ba ng harap-harapan? Yung tipong wala kang magawa kasi mas senior siya sayo? Ako oo. Hay. Isang residente. Babae. Ayoko ng pangalanan at baka maging sikat pa siya. Ang sarap nga siguro niyang i-post sa youtube. I mean parang mga Fajardo-style. Tipong i-youtube kung paano niya kaming mga clerks tratuhin. Sa pananalita, sa lahat. Hay. Naniniwala na ako nawala sa antas ng pinag-aralan ang breeding. Hello, doctor ka, tapos ganoon ka magsalita. Ganoon ka magtrato ng tao? Basta, after ako malait ng dalwang beses kagabi, isang 7 pm, isang 2 am in the morning by the same doctor, umiyak talaga ako sa callroom. Tulog ang mga groupmates ko since shifting kami ng pagmonitor ng pasyente. Iyak lang ako. Actually hindi ko alam kung ano ang gagawin. Madami pa daw ganyang mga tao sa med. Sabi ko nga sa sarili ko, ito yung mga moments na gusto kong magsumbong sa lolo ko or kahit kanino na may authority over her. Pero what for di ba? Magmumukha lang akong immature. Kailangan ko sigurong masanay. lang Kailangan ko talagang mamaster yung art of 'pasok sa isang tenga, labas sa kabila". Shit.

2. Nagcode ang patient. At ako lang gising that time sa callroom ng surgery clerks. Nagpage sa room namin ang nurse station. "Si bed no. yadayada hindi na po humihinga". Parang wala lang. So adrenaline rush. Hinanap ko sa decking ang patient bed no. Wala sa amin. Nontheless, pumunta na din ako doon. Nandoon na ang intern na naghahandle sa amin. Nakasampa na si dra. si kama at nagCPR. Pinalapit niya ako, ready na na palitan siya. Kalmado pa ang relative ng pasyente that time. Hinihimas ang mga legs ng pasyente. Hinawakan ko nga din siya, mainit pa. Then nagpalit na kami ni dra. Ako na ang nagpupump. Nagsimula ng umiyak ang relatives. Ang hirap pala. Eto yung kagagaling ko lang from my solo moment after maboljak ni Dra. So naiiyak na din ako habang magpump. Alangan naman sabayan ko yung relatives. Nakakastress siya. Parang iba talaga yung feeling kapag nandoon ka. Then pinalitan na ako ng iba pang nagsidatingang duty clerks. I don't know what to do. I don't know what to feel that time. Parang gusto ko lapitan yung relatives and calm them down. In the end, I attended to the other patient na nandoon sa same ward. Tumaas kasi ang bp dahil siguro sa nangyayari. In the end, the patient was revived after almost an hour of resuscitation. I felt relieved for the family. I went back to checking my patients.

Pictures from the Hospital

2009-04-19T20:13:00.000-07:00

Heto na ang mga pictures!

My typewriter, Olivetti pala siya imbes na Olivietti! Hahahaha

Brothers

Our New Printer!

Surgery Clerks' Lounge. Biggest Lounge in the entire clerkship!

Lounge Lounge Lounge!

Lockers!

Our Area: Ortho/TCVS Group Table and Board

Nightmare. Typewriters. Printer

2009-04-19T05:17:00.000-07:00

"Oist duty ako niyan today, anong oras na? Anong oras na? may 7 am na ba? May 7 na?!! Patay Patay!"

That was me, shouting at my sister an hour ago. I got home around 5 pm today from the hospital. I thought I'd get some much needed shut-eye, since tomorrow, I'll be on duty again at the surgery ward. I was able to get some much needed sleep when suddenly I was awakened by my sister, who has just taken a bath and was rummaging for something inside my room. The room was dark so I thought it was already early morning, and that she was also getting ready to go to the hospital (She's a nurse). Turns out gabi pa pala! Ack, my body clock is so fucked-up right now. All I know is Duty-From duty-Preduty 1 and Pre-duty 2.Hay.

-0-

I bought a typewriter today. I never thought it would be this complicated to buy something that is already becoming obsolete..or so I thought. It turns out that hospital records are still being typedwritten as of this time, UST Clinical division being one of them. And being a clerk, as the name implies, require us to do, well, basic clerical work. Type. Type. Type. That is aside from doing the med related stuffs. I never thought I'd be faced we so much paperwork with just one patient.

A patient who underwent a surgical procedure should have, in his/her file an OR tech notes. This is the step-by-step procedure done during the operation. 4 copies siya dapat. One for the hospital, 1 for the resident, 1 for the patient and one for yourself, for your record keeping. Furthermore, patients will need 4 copies of discharge notes once he/she is for discharge as well as 4 copies of Follow-up notes and a copy of Initial Notes. Follow-up notes will have the take home meds of the patient as well as follow-up appointments with the different departments that handled the patient during hi/her entire stay at the hospital. Initial notes will have the evaluation of the patient during admission and before discharge. All of them typedwriten! The horrors!

The last time I used a typewriter was way back in high school. It was for a class I already forgot. We were required to type THE QUICK BROWN FOX JUMPS OVER THE LAZY DOG over and over and over again. I thought that that will be the last time I'll be handling one..I guess not.

The idea of the perfect machine came into focus during my 1st duty night. There were three of us on duty that night and 2 of us, Kay and I, each have a patient to discharge the next day. That means we have to type all those paperworks that night. That is on top of all the patients that you have to manage every 15 minutes or every 30 minutes or every hour to 4 hours, endorsed to us by our peers who are not on duty. Tinie, the third member of our group has a new patient which means she has to accomplish all initial evaluation forms, typedwritten. It turns out, the three of us don't have typewriters. We had to borrow one from the other groups. In short nakapila kami. We were up the entire night typing and retyping things. Ang hirap magtype ng inaantok at maraming dapat gawin. Commas become periods and sometimes, you forget that you should click the key to shift to lowercase or else you'll end up typing the wrong key. Imagine how many times I had to type one OR tech before I got it right. Hindi pa maganda yung typedwriter na nahiram namin. As in kumukubit mag-isa yung papel. So my first notes? Disoriented ang mga words. Good thing my superiors forgave me. I even ran out of paper pala that night that I had to scout for xerox stores na open 24 hours. Buti may isang super late magsara that night. Hay. It was a bit scary pa walking through Dapitan St. in my white uniform. Daming tambay. Feeling ko they'll pounce on me if they had a chance. Good thing no such thing happened.

So today, when we got off around 4 pm, we went to Quiapo to hunt for the ultimate typewriter. Ang mahal kasi ng orig. Only Office warehouse sell those stuffs. Wala na sa mga appliances store. Mister and I looked for one last night sa Rockwell. Office Warehouse carries only 2 brands and one for electric and one for manual lang, so no choice ka. A manual typewriter sells for 4,550 while the cheapest electric typewriter was being sold for 5,999 pesos. Mahal.

So tehre we were, braving the sweltering heat of summer, looking for typewriters. It was like looking for a needle in a haystack. Ang daling bumili ng sound system, dvd's and pamparegla, pero typewriters? We had to ask, ask and ask. Evetually were able to find 2 stores. We tried several refurbished machines. Meron akong nagustuhang orange na Olympia, kaso manong won't sell it to me for 1500. He was asking for 1900. Out of budget considering may mga 1400 naman. I ended up buying an Olivietti for 1,400. 1,500 siya dapat pero natawaran ko kasi wala namang cover. Sa init din ayoko ng maghanap pa ng iba. I typed an entire page of THE QUICK... just to make sure na wala siyang problema. I asked manong kung paano siya gamitin, i-adjust and all those stuffs. Ayokong magkaproblema in the middle of the week while using it kasi I have no time to go to Quiapo niyan to have it fixed. I also tried using stacks of papers with carbon in between jsut to know kung pupwedeng magtype ng sabay-sabay para mas efficient.

Since duty din kami ni Cay the next day, we decided to drop by UST again to leave the machines there sa clerk's lounge para wala ng problem. I failed to get a picture of my baby. I hope we'll have a smooth working relationship the entire year =) Here's to a year of typing, typing and more typing!

-0-

Our group also bought an all-in-one printer, scanner and copier machine today. Tig-225 pesos kami since we are 33 in a group. We we thinking about getting a P3,900 HP printer kaso lang the black ink refill costs 600+ tapos 200 pages lang ang napriprint. We ended up buying the P6,999.00 printer ng HP na may ink refill ng 370 pesos, either black or colored, tapos 600 pages pa ang napriprint.

We needed the machine for paperworks that are not needed to be typedwriten. yes, there are other papers to be accomplished na nagamitan na ng 21st century touch. If you are on duty, you'll feel the frustration of not being able to find a 24 hr. computer shop na open para makapagpaprint ka. Or on a Sunday, like today, computer shop na open as early as 7 am para magpaprint ng due na paper that morning.

Ako din bumili ng printer na ito kanina during our break. We plan to charge the otehr group P3.00 for every printing or copying job order para naman maka ipon kami and makabili ng ink or another machine for our group. The good thing with buying this machine during a Sale is that they give you free stuffs. We got a ream of short bond paper from HP. That means we don't have to problem about buying paper for some time! Tipid! Hehe.

I kind like the sleek design of the printer. Tapos black pa color niya, so medyo astig. I'll try to post a pix of it when I have time na. I'll add a shot of our lounge, our home for the next 2 mos. hehe. Right now, I have to read for plastic surgery conference tomorrow and get some sleep after that, duty tom e.

365 Days for 386 People

2009-04-15T06:43:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was elected president by my batchmates. It's a great opportunity as well as responsibility and I hope I could fulfill it excellently in the days to come. Thanks for the trust my 385 friends.

-0-

I will start my rotation at UST CD Surgery department. My first day's tomorrow. I start at 6:30 am. I already have a patient due for operation at 7 am in the morning. I am also on duty which means I'll be up from 6:30 am tomorrow to 12nn the next day. Happy clerkship talaga ito! hahaha. Good thing I'll be spending it with my bff's Kay and Tinie. Sadly, I don't have weekends off. So goodbye Salcedo market. Goodbye Legaspi market. I hope I could manage my time well para balanse ang school/hospital life as well as personal life. Wish me luck guys and add me to your prayers =)

The C1 2009 Bicol Trip Day 2-3

2009-04-13T17:14:00.001-07:00

2nd Day: The Caramoan Islands

"How many islands does the Philippines have?"

"It depends; High tide or low tide?"

We woke up really early the next day. Shar’s relative had arranged a driver that will take us to the port. We were asleep the entire trip. When we arrived at Sabal Port, the sun was beginning to cast it’s rays on the shore. I spotted people jogging by the beach. Others were busy talking about their catch and how much they earned that day. We were busy looking for a clean restroom.

Early morning bliss

The trip from the port lasted about 2 hours. It was a peaceful boatride. The manongs were not in a hurry to reach our destination unlike those in the Batangas Pier who make the 1 ½ hr ride from Batangas-White Beach into a 45 min trip in order for them to be able to make more trips and earn more at the end of the day.

Some island shot I took along the way

Anyway, during the 2-hr. trip, we swapped stories regarding our love lives, take pictures and basically just have fun. It helps that I’m in the company of people who never run out of stories.

At the town's port

It was almost lunch time when we reached our destination. At the port area, we took a 20 minute jeep to the town where we are staying. It’s a transient house with dorm-like air-conditioned rooms. We took the room with the most beds so we could share the night together. The more, the merrier!

We left our things at the room and headed towards another port where the boat which was suppose to take us from one island to another has been waiting for us for almost an hour already. Instead of having lunch at the house, the caretaker packed our lunch and bade us a safe trip.

Marking our territory

I wasn’t able to take note of how many islands we visited that day. All I know is that at the end of the day, my back’s sore from the sunburn and I’m drained and sleepy. Here are some of the pictures we took of the beaches we visited:

White Sand

SOS?

Starfishes

Footprints in the sand

Emo mode

Jumping..

..Jumping..

..Jumping!

Tinie's Love

Unreadable Euge

3rd Day: Flavors of Naga

The morning after the rain

It was raining the entire night. When we woke up, the sun was nowhere in sight. Only clouds lined the sky. The clothes we hung to dry the night before were soaking wet. We were all reluctant to take a shower since the water’s freezing. Since we had to rush back to the port to catch the 9 am boat ride back to Sabal Area we just braved the freezing water!

Breakfast before hitting the road

I was expecting a crazy trip back, but the waters seem to be commiserating with the gloomy weather. The trip was uneventful except for the occasional rain showers. It was quite calming to be at sea at such a melancholic time. The manongs coursed another path on our way back to Sabal, near the shore to avoid the strong currents. We were able to appreciate the beauty of the islands we haven’t seen the previous day.

It's a gloomy day!

Cloudy and Foggy Day

When we arrived at the port, the driver was already there to pick us up and bring us back to Shar’s place. I was asleep the entire trip. When I woke up, we were back in Naga City.

Since most of us were hungry, we decided to just have lunch at CWC. There, we were met by Shar’s cousins, Ahia Jeff and Peter (? Not sure about the name hehe)who then treated us to lunch. We explored the place and planned for our wakeboarding adventure the following day. Tinie and I took turns ogling at the foreigners who were present that day.

Welcome to CWC

Even at CWC, the sky's dark and cloudy

Clouds over the Cabanas

C1 with our Ahias

Ehehehehe

Wakeboarding, anyone?

After CWC, we headed home. We were pleasantly surprised to see Shar’s mom and aunt preparing meryenda. They cooked a native pancit with soup dish that is very, very tasty that we just had to try it even if we just had a heavy lunch.

Shar's Mom in Action!

Three ways to prepare banana!

After our early meryenda, we went to the uber cool entertainment room where we watched Celine Dion’s A New Day Has Come Las Vegas Concert in Surround Sound. The room was very, very, very impressive if I may say. It’s got the works of Greenbelt Cinema, except for the chairs which they replaced with a comfortable sofa with lot’s of throw pillows. We felt we were watching the concert live! Astig!

The Entertainment Room!

By the time the concert was done, it was chow time. All of us were treated to Bigg’s, Bicol region’s famous diner. I ordered the baby back ribs while Tinie had the Extreme Platter. Of course we took pictures like we own the place! Hahaha cam-whores to the max!

Bigg's Diner Dinner!

Cam Whores hahahaha

Nice Interiors

Red!

Diesel!

Breakfast at Tiffany's?

Extreme Bigg's!

We were so full after a day of endless meals. We literally zonked out when we reached home. Hahaha.

Days 4-6 to follow =)

Allergic Rhinitis Overload

2009-04-12T00:15:00.000-07:00

I do have allergic rhinitis. I wake up everyday with stuffed nose and watery eyes. It's part of my normal routine. I just take a warm bath then it's gone. It's a different tale though when I'm transported to places where the temperature goes way below what we usually have in the Philippines.

Take for example Hong Kong. It's chilly and windy here all day. A welcome respite from our extremely hot summer weather right? Well, the problem is that the chilly weather evolves during night into a some kind of blizzard. Since we live near the mountains, it's like Baguio weather x20 in the evening and early morning. That's what wakes me up around 3 am everyday! It makes me do the allergic cluck, rabbit nose maneuver and all other stuffs that people with allergic rhinitis do. My nose and palate becomes itchy. It's hard to breathe and well, I can't get back to sleep. That is why I'm always sleepy during the day.

It took its toll on me yesterday, making me feel weak all over. I spent the entire day bedridden. I only went out around 6-7 pm in the evening to get a massage. It was quite expensive considering the conversion factor. But damn, I needed the backrub. I was knocked out cold during the entire 90 minutes. I left the place having this inner sense of peace and wellness.

But then the weather is at it again. Same allergic rhinitis. Same stuffed nose at 3 in the morning. I have to remind myself to stop being stubborn and just buy some meds later before heading home. I will be home soon! I never thought I'd miss the sunshiny weather in Manila when I left, but now I'm terribly missing it! Can't wait to get a whiff of hotness tomorrow when arrive!

Manila. Manila. I keep coming back to Manila.. Manila I'm coming home!

The C1 2009 Bicol Trip Day 1: Left behind

2009-04-04T05:24:00.000-07:00

That C1 Bicol Trip. Haha. You'd think it would be the most organized and well-planned trip since most C1 are OC.. er not! Hahaha.

1st Day: Left Behind!

Hana was suppose to drop by my place on her way to the airport. Our flight will depart from Terminal 3 at 6:20 am. I was already awake by 3 am. Talk about being excited. I took a bath, dressed then waited for her call/text. I thought I'd lie in bed since maaga pa naman. It's quite early pa considering she told us all that it's ok to arrive at the airport 45 minutes before the scheduled departure time. It's my first time to fly domestic, so I took her word for it. I reminded her to text or call me if she's on her way so I could wait for her outside the building. Nakakahiya naman to make her wait pa, ako na nga yung makikisabay. Four am, no message or call from her yet. Five am, I was already panicking. Did she forget to drop by my place? I decided to call her. She immediately picked up. I asked her what time will she leave for the airport. Around 5:15 daw. All I said was, "ok".

Around 5:15 she called me, labas na daw ako. In fairness, ang bilis kong bumaba from the 5th floor with my luggage and backpack. When I got into her car, she introduced me to her brother. Siya maghahatid sa amin. medyo awkward kasi parang nagtatalo sila before ako sumakay. nasabi na lang ni Hana sa akin is that late na daw kami. I didn't understand. I thought 45 minutes from departure time ang usapan? I texted my other friends. Most of them are at the airport na.

On the way, we chatted about grabbing breakfast before boarding. I haven't eaten anything before leaving the house. I didn't want to wake manang since naisip ko may mga resto naman sa Terminal 3. We've decided to buy coffee and sandwicch sa Seattle's Best. Of course I am delighted, favorite ko iyon e.

Anyway, when we arrived at the airport, all my other classmates were already inside. Nakapila na sila though hindi pa sila nakapag-check-in since Hana was the one with the tickets. It happened so fast. While we were walking towards their line, the screen in front of them changed from Flight XXX to the Cebu Pacific Logo. As in ganoon kabilis. My classmates went in front of the queue and inquired bakit naging ganoon. The guy behind the counter simply said that the line is closed already. How can that be when we were in line all the time. There were even guys ahead of us. He just directed us towards the express counter. Pagdating namin doon, the girl, around our age, asked us for our tickets. We presented them. Sabi lang niya sa amin e, "Sorry, closed na po, hindi na po kayo makakasakay". WTF! E we were right there, in front of the line. Wala pang 6 am iyon. Other passengers started complaining. Why didn't they announce sa PA system na last call na? That is standard procedure. She started calling her superior who's back was turned away from us. Deadma. Ayaw kami harapin. Basta closed na daw. If we want we could reschedule it for tomorrow na lang. Hello? Ok ka lang? Our tickets are for today, not the next day or the day after that. Shit, hindi pa ako nagbreakfast niyan kaya ang init-init ng ulo ko. Time is running out. She could have just allowed us all since ang dami namin. Instead she pretended to be typing crap into the screen. One irrate passenger even went behind the counter to speak with her and her very, very bastos na supervisor. We were complaining about their standard procedure that day. My classmates were there. If they have heard the last call for sure they would have done something. Hello, 11 kami sa group?! You know what the supervisor did? She turned around and said "Kaya nadedelay ang flights namin, dahil sa inyo!". Sabay turn around. Hidni naman singkagandahan ang lola mo. In my mind, ilang beses ko na siya nahead butt, sabunutan at kinalbo. BBBBBUUUUWWWWIISSSSEEEETTTT!

Well, if you think we gave up on those two women, diyan kayo nagkakamali. Eleven kami, and of course, yung iba pang nastuck na passengers. Imagine all of us, standing in line blocking the other passengers, complaining and complaining and complaining. We made sure they got an earful from all of us. We just stopped when our supposed plane finally took off. We switched to the rebooking line. We were a bit nicer there. Turns out being nice won't get you anywhere if you're travelling with Cebu Pacific. First of all, they charge 13++ for rebooking of flights. Second, all the remaining seats for the following day's just not within our budget. It's even more expensive than all our (11) tickets combined! Anothe option is to get into the 12 nn Legaspi flight. Same thing, too costly. We checked out PAL Express. They were very accommodating. Kahit na 10 minutes before the departure na they were intending to book us into their Legaspi flight right there and then. Problem is, not all of us are keen on paying extra for the tickets. We ended up missing that flight too.

So how did we eventually end up at Naga that day? Simple. Bus. Yes, instead of the relaxing 45-minute plane ride, we took the bumpy 9-hour bus ride from Cubao to Naga. Mind you, we were in deluxe. The one with the CR inside. Hehehe. Turns out one of our classmate's family own the Penafrancia line, so after informing her mother of our situation, she made immediate reservations for all of us. Sayang 9 lang iyong free, so Tere and BF we're moved to another line.

Our one and only stopover to Naga: McDonald's Tiaong, Quezon

Tinie and I. We ordered the same thing: Double Cheeseburger with Large Fries

C1 minus Tere and Bf at McDonald's.
(L-R) Hana, Lady, Nikkie, Tinie, Euge, Shar, Reina, Mitch and Laur

Lifesaver: Penafrancia Bus Line. Lady posing for the camera before we go back on the road.

So how was the trip? Well, ok naman. I was seated at the last row, kung saan ramdam mo lahat ng bump sa road hehe. Ok lang. Tatlo naman kami doon. I was with my bff Tinie and Shar (whose family own's the line). You'd think she'd get special treatment for it, pero hindi. Hehe. It was a funny experience actually. It was Shar's first time to go out in a group outing with us. I mean really go out of Manila with classmates/friends. Strict ang parents masyado. The moment we were left by our plane, she was telling us na baka hindi na siya payagang makaalis. Kahit siya nga nagulat na pinayagan pa rin siya in the end ng parents niya sumama sa amin.

During the entire trip to Naga, the three of us barely slept. Kahit na 3 am pa ako gising, I wasn't sleepy. We talked about anything under the sun, from our fear of starting as ob clerks to our favorite mtv videos, to our plans after graduation. Tinie was thinking more about her bf's state sa med. Shar was telling us about what her father told her about choosing our internship hospital. It was actually a very enlightening experience. When we arrived at naga, parang bitin pa iyong kuwentuhan namin.

Instead of alighting from the bus, hinatin kami straight to Shar's relatives' house. There, here aunt welcomed us. She then showed us to our rooms. Doon lang namin lahat naramdaman yung pagod ng 9-hour bus ride. Tere and bf were still on the road that time since their bus had to make stops pa along the way. They arrived when we were already getting ready for dinner.

Dinner was great. They prepared barbecue for us as well as pancit and a Bicol delicacy they call Pinangat. It's similar to Laing, but the leaves are rolled into small clumps with some sort of fish as filling. They were spicy kaya I ate more than I was expected to hehehe!

After dinner, we went to a resto called ColdShack. Turns out they also own the place. It's like ColdStone. They had us try several of their bestsellers. In the end, kami pa ang nag-give up since they wanted us to try yung mga ice cream cakes nila.

All in all, being left behind wasn't that bad at all. I was able to spend more time with my friends, and well, eat free ice cream. Lot's of it! Hehehe

It's Summer!

2009-04-04T04:27:00.000-07:00

It's blue because it's summer. I don't know how to swim. Summer is not my favorite time of the year. But it's here, so what the heck! I'm joining the bandwagon. I just changed my template into something that would represent summer in our country: beaches, beaches and more beaches.

Be sure to apply some sunscreen! =) Have Fun!

The Dulcolax Abuse

2009-03-28T07:25:00.000-07:00

I still haven't been able to normalize some of my body functions since the 3-week exams. One of which is the regular bowel movement. Since I'll be going on a trip down south with friends, I thought I should take some drastic actions. I don't want to be stuck on an island without clean toilets when the urge strikes!

Dulcolax came into mind. It's cheap and it is an over-the-counter drug so no problemo on how to procure it. I bought four. Usually one tablet is enough to give your insides the much needed nudge. Two tablets are prescribed for those undergoing colonoscopy procedures. I took two. It was my first time. I was expecting the crampy abdominal pain after an hour. Nada. After 2 hours, still no symptoms. 3rd hour, I gave up. Maybe I got nothing there that needs some pushing.

Then after dinner, I felt it. Shiiiiiiiiiieeeeetttt. I'm at Tomas Morato, enjoying dessert when suddenly I felt that awful, crampy feeling in my gut. I'm soooo far away from home. I tried to remain calm. I suggested that we go home already without mentioning what I'm feeling. In the car, I turned on my ipod just to veer my mind away from my current situation. Adelle was playing. Reminding me of chasing pavements. Shit. Just the perfect song!

Good thing there's no traffic. I called manang on our landline to go down and wait for me at the gate. When I arrived, she's still not there. I started raging war on our doorbell. I even shouted at the gate so that she can get the idea that I am in a hurry. When she opened the door, I went straight to the bathroom. Heaven. Hehehe. Finally I'm clean. Caramoan, here I come! =)

Sometimes We Are The Patients

2009-03-25T17:01:00.000-07:00

I've stopped watching Grey's Anatomy since the new season started. I've simply lost interest. But, recently, my friends and I are rediscovering Seattle Grey. Why? Find out for yourself.

And Then What?

2009-03-25T03:36:00.000-07:00

My head's got a mind of its own ever since the exams ended earlier today. I've been feeling nauseatic just before neurology finals then it went into a full blast headache afterwards. I don't know how I was able to go through lunch without puking the food I'm eating with this kind of intensity. I went home after, took a long nap, then woke up, still with this lingering feeling of unease. Is this my body's way of handling the sudden withdrawal from stress?

Exams are finally over. Or that's what we'd like to think. Some friends are going to Embassy tonight. Some will opt to stay at home and rest. I, like the rest of my friends will go out with our respective partners to catch up on quality time missed during the entire 3-week examfest. The last hurray for the last day of the school year. Technically, school year 2008-2009 ends on Friday, at 12 nn, after we've submitted our compre test papers. For some, it ends on April 3, that is if you're one of the unlucky (or is it really lucky that they will have a second chance to redeem themselves? hmm) ones who'd have to take the remedial exams (removal exams in other institutions). Since the comprehensive will not really be directly included in the computation of our grades, it is safe to say, that the school year has finally come to an end. Third year is over.

Anyway, at this very writing, I've been maintaining a fully flexed neck in order to alleviate my headache. Somehow this position seems to lessen that awful feeling that makes me want to throw-up. Advil seems to be not working for me this time. I'm really leaning forward to the idea that this is actually psychological in nature. A withdrawal symptom of some sort. Everyday for the last couple of weeks, I'd go home with an intent to change out of my uniforms into something comfortable, and head out to study for next day's exam/s. I see to it that the night before, I've fixed all the handouts, books that I'll be needing for the next day so as not to waste precious time. I am only anal with time during exams. And now, suddenly I'm not. There are no handouts to be read, no books to be scanned, no notes to be printed. Suddenly, I've got nothing to do. Suddenly, no definite purpose at hand. My emotions have been robbed instantly of all uncertainty, fear and despair. The monotony of everyday life has been taken away from me and immediately I am at a lost. Lost for things to do or think about. I'm not saying this to complain or anything. I'm merely stating the fact that the immensity of the demand for me to be someplace at this time, to do something at this very moment, has been abruptly been withdrawn and to say the very least, it feels weird.

At around 7 pm, you'd most definitely find me at Starbucks or Coffebean with either tons of handouts in front of me, or with one of my trusty med books. I would definitely be reading. Or maybe imagining things. Analayzing data after data after data that might prove useful to me the following day. I might have a water bottle beside me. A Tea latte or Caramel macchiatto too (it depends on which coffeeshop I'm crashing). My classmate maybe seated across me, or beside me, either doing the same thing as I am or foolishly daydreaming of summer or what sorry excuse for summer that we have (though it hasn't started yet, we only get 2 weeks off before clerkship starts). At around 11pm, I might be on my way home, sleepy and tired from all the stuffs I've been doing. I ride a cab on my own, or with my friends. I might be dozing off while taxi zooms its way across the metro. By the time I'm home, I spend some time in the bathroom, do some calls, then hit the bed.

The firm evidence of things to do and the certainty of emotions to feel have finally left me and I feel bizaare. And maybe I'll love it, I just have to start getting the hang of it.

Dreams

2009-03-20T16:18:00.000-07:00

For the past few days I've been waking up scared and panting, cold sweats and all. I've been having bad dreams. I don't know if you would call them nightmares, but then, maybe they are, not just the type you often see on movies.

Dream no. 1:

Characters: Lola: Gloria Romero (I think siya ata lola ko sa panaginip na ito, Euge, Mother, Baby, Killer

So in this scene, we live in the slums ala slumdog millionaire. Or evacuation center. Basta puro tents. Tapos may ulan pang napakalakas. So I can't remember the reason na, pero lola woke me up, asked me to accompany her somewhere to get something. May dog kami dito. So we were walking around the area, it's still raining hard, then she suddenly said, "we need to save the baby". So we started walking to towards a certain direction. All of a sudden napahinto kami. At the corner, we saw someone parang stab another person. As in brutally. From the looks of it, he killed the guy, tamang-tama na paglingon niya sa amin, may baby na nilabas from the tent by some unknown woman,s hand ala lion king. Dripping with blood. Parang bagong panganak. Then I had this scary idea na papatayin nung guy yung mother nung baby kasi iisipin niya na nakita siya when he killed the other guy. Then nagising na ako.

Dream no. 2:

Cats. I'm scared of cats. I've had several traumatic experiences with cats to last me a lifetime. Anyway, this dream, hindi ko na masyadong maalala. I'm sure nakuwento ko pa ito sa friend ko pero right now, di ko siya maalala. All I know is that cats are killing people. They are large and they are, I think killing people. That's scary right?

Dream 3:

This one, I still can't remember kung ano nangyari pero I know it also revolves around death and all.

Dream 4:

Eto kani-kanina lang. Bago pa siya mawala sa isipan ko. I'll blog it na. So I was walking inside the hospital. Suddenly I saw one of my friends there. Nakahiga sa loob ng isang ward being prep'd for surgery. I was surprised so nilapitan ko siya. I think I asked him why he was there. Sabi lang niya kailangan daw.

Suddenly, on the bed beside his, a batchmate of mine, si Cosette, in her pajamas, climbed on the bed and made herself comfortable. I asked her what happened. All she said was, 'kailangan e'. I then asked her how she's doing with her Wushu (she trains regularly since she's part of the Philippine team). Sabi niya ok lang. I asked her if her being a patient at the hospital is connected with Wushu. Then she coded. Suddenly lost consciousness then started having sezures. All the nurses came to revive her. It happened so fast I didn't know how to react. Then I woke up.

I don't know kung stressed lang ako lately or what. Hay.

In No Particular Order

2009-03-20T07:56:00.000-07:00

Tapos na ang week na ito for me. I'm counting it per Monday-Friday so for me, the week's over. Done with the second week of exams. God, one week na lang. Five exams to go and then I'm free. I can already see myself sa CamSur/Bicol. Pati na sa HK.

-0-

Today they posted our tuition fee. Everyone's excited kahit hindi pa namin alam kung we'll move on to the next level or not. This time, whole year na siya at hindi na per sem like the usual. It's roughly around 182K. Like every student, I was thinking of ways on how to break the news to my mom, tito and lolo without getting the 'ang mahal naman ng tuition niyo this year anak'. Anyway, sa mom ko tinext ko na lang. Now the tito and lolo has always been the most humbling part. See, I'm under their company's scholarship. Although wala namang anything formal like a request letter/show us your grades kind of set-up, nahihiya pa din ako lagi mag-ask ng money from them for my tuition. Lalo na ngayon, ang daming renovations sa building. Magpapatayo pa sila ng bagong house. Nandoon lagi yung pagpapakumbaba kapag lumalapit ako every enrolment time. So kanina, when I got home, bago ako bumawi ng tulog, hinintay ko na dumating sa office ang tito ko. Hindi naman ako naghintay ng matagal since mga 10 minutes lang narinig ko na na nag-open yung parking. Well, medyo kinabahan ako. Lagi naman akong kinakabahan kapag ganito. When he came to his office, I said the my usual hi's/hello's then went straight to the point. I informed him that I only have til next week then bakasyon na. If everything goes according to plan, I'll be a clerk cum April 16. Then I handed him the breakdwon of fees for the coming school year. Sabi ko medyo malaki yung amount na kailangan bayaran agad since it's clerkship. Sabi lang niya so akin 'no problem'. I said thank you and informed him of the day of enrolment. In my mind, two down, lolo ko na lang.

I always pay a courtesy call to my lolo at his house at the end of every sem just to thank him for all the help he's been extending to me and my family. Ganoon din ang gagawin ko this year after all my exams. I do visit him naman on a regular basis pero lately hindi ko nagagawa.

Anyway, this time aside from saying thank you, isasabay ko na ang pag-inform about my tuition fee since 2 weeks lang ang vacation namin before internship. I hope I find him in a jolly mood. What would life be without my tito and lolo? I love them to bits.

-0-

This year dapat CamSur lang ang vacation ko. Pero biglang nadagdag ang HK since tumawag ang tita ko. May 'padala' daw ang dad ko for us. Don't get me wrong ha, patay na dad ko. The 'padala' is a chinese thing. I mean, they have certain traditions sa China na hindi ko din maintindihan since di naman namin ginagawa dito. Bale may padasal doon for my dad tapos may binigay daw yung mga monks to my lola na dapat daw ibigay sa amin. E ang mama ko medyo sucker for things like that, so ako ang inutos para kunin siya. Ok na din iyon para mavisit ko na din si lola. Lately, she's been feeling the effects of old age na. Medyo masakitin na. May arthritis pa siya. E kung makapagpapasaya sa kanya yung makita ako, who am I to refuse di ba? Kamukha ko kasi dad ko, so medyo gustong-gusto niya akong nakikita.

Anyway, I've booked a flight na kanina. Since halos pareho lang yung price ng Cebu Pacific and PAl when I compared prices, nag-PAL na lang ako. May food pang kasama. Last time I took PAL to HK, nasa PT pa ako. I also browsed through the events sa website ng HK Tourism Board kung may interesting happening doon sa April. Ang maabutan ko lang e yung HK International Film Festival. Hopefully, makapanood ng isa man lang sa mga kasaling films. May Pinoy entry pala tayo doon. Yanggaw. I'll check nga the reception nila sa film na iyon.

Hopefully maging fruitful naman ang vacation na ito. Since tag-hirap ngayon, no shopping for me. Limited lang ang baon ko according to my mom, so no UNIQLO and H&M. I'll bring my NDS na lang and a book siguro. Somehow, I like the idea of just doing nothing sa HK. I mean, yung hindi ka rushed na bumili ng kung ano-ano. I'll probably stay sa park or sa library nila. Maganda ang library nila doon ha. Maybe swim na din. Open na kaya ang Kowloon Park na swimming pools? I love going there. Anyway, see you HK on April 8 =).

-0-

The Bicol trip was my classmates/groupmates' idea. Parang road trip siya. We fly to Bicol then just take teh buses to go from one town to the other. The great thing about travelling with girls is that they are so mabusisi when it comes to the itenerary. Right now all I know is that mag-Cam Sur kami and ok na mga titirhan namin. I was kinda lost during the exams na hindi na ako nagbother na magtanong ng information regarding the trip. Masaya na ako with the idea na malapit na siyang matupad.

See you March 28 Bicol!

-0-

I was at UP-Ayala Techno Hub yesterday. Doon kami nag-aral ng pedia. It's a nice place. Very peaceful. Kahit na nasa major highway siya, di namin alintana yung mga sasakyan. Most of the shops are under construction but the major coffeeshops like Starbucks and Coffeebean are already open for the public to enjoy.

Nahirapan nga lang ako umuwi last night since ang layo niya from our place. Hehe. Hindi well lit yung highway so ang hirap maghanap ng cab. All the cars look the same lalo na kung medyo challenged ka sa night vision.

-0-

Ang sarap ng feel na humiga lang sa kama at tumunganga. Ganyan ginawa ko kaninang pagising. I was up kasi since 3 am kanina studying for pedia, so pag-uwi, talagang psyched na psyched akong matulog. When I woke up, gabi na. May text ang mga friends. May text din ang mister. Hindi ako kumilos. Hindi ako nagreply agad. Nakahiga lang ako and nakatunganga. I was trying not to think about the remaining exams. I was just staring in space. Actually, I was feeling the sheets beneath me. Ang sarap ng feeling niya sa skin. For the past couple of days, hihiga lang ako sa kama para ipikit at ipahinga ang mata at utak ko. Hindi talaga para matulog. Usually kasi mga 2-4 hours lang ang tulog ko kapag exams. Nabobother pa ako sa ganyan katagal na tulog ha. kanina, habang nakahiga, saka ko lang ulit na feel yung fuzzy, warm feeling of being underneath the blanket habang naka fullblast ang aircon. Sarap. Nakakatawa. Totoo nga. You get to appreciate more the simple things you usually take for granted kapag wala kang iniisip at ginagawa.

-0-

I'm looking forward to the weekend. Kahit na alam ko na more or less mag-aaral lang ako, andyan yung joy na I'll be spending time with someone dear. Nandyan din ang Sunday lunch and Spelling Bee sa gabi. Sana lang hindi ako masyadong matuwa, kasi kailangan ko talagang mag-aral pa since may 1 week of exams pa kami.

-0-

Please add me to your prayers. Ala lang. Just in case you do pray, add niyo naman that I may do well in my exams. Thank you =)

Ang First Week ng 3-Week Exam. Bow.

2009-03-13T01:30:00.000-07:00

Nagsimula na siya. Ang nakakabaliw na 3-week exam ng medicine. Heto na ang make or break moment ng mga karaniwang estudyante tulad ko. Unless ikaw yung bestfriend ko na tipong kahit hindi pasukin ang mga exams this week ay sigurado ng magcleclerkship sa darating na April 16. Actually, as of this writing may 2 weeks na lang ako bago matapos ang school year.

Sa mga huling linggo ng school year, may tatlong set of exams ang med. Una ay ang shifting exam. Long exam siya, 80-100 items depende sa subject. Topics usually e yung nacover lang after the previous shifting. Gaano kadami ang topics? Mga 6-10. Ilang chapters naman ang 6-10 na iyan sa libro? Mga 300 pages max lang naman..per subject. As in para kang nagbabasa ng mga Harry Potter vol. 5 araw-araw. Mas boring nga lang.

Second exam yung pamatay. Finals. As in 20% siya ng final grade ng each subject. 100-120 items siya covering the entire topics discussed sa subject na iyon. Kung 1 year subject iyon, lahat ng topics from June-March kasali. Kung semestral naman siya, topics from November-March ang pagkukunan ng mga tanong. HOWMYGAD no? Iyan din ang unang expression ko nung 1st year. Ngayon, para lang siyang normal na parte ng buhay ko..tulad ng bowel movement. Sabi ng mga nega classmates ko kanina "if this is bad, next week is worse". Leche. Napacomment nga ako sa Facebook niya. E pumapasa nga ang mokong ng hindi nagaaral e. As in one of those gifted people in med na ang sarap sakalin. Hehehe. As in PSP ng PSP, pero pagdating ng exam, pasado.

Anyway, yung third exam, yun yung pinakagusto ko. Comprehensive exam. From 1st year-3rd year ang coverage. O di ba? Bongga. Bakit ko siya trip? Well, simple lang naman. Kapag pinasa mo siya at nakakuha ka ng grade of 85 and above, plus 2 direct to the final grade din iyon. As in kung 73 ka sa medicine (which means bagsak ka at uulitin mo siya ng isang taon) at nakakuha ka ng 85 sa compre, winner, 75 ka na automatically. Pasadong-pasado. Kapag 75-84 ka naman, plus 1 direct to the grade ang makukuha mo. So bakit type na type namin ito? Sa mga wannabe Zumma, Magna at Cum Laude, opportunity ito para lalong mapataas ang matataas na nilang grades. Para sa regular students like me, chance to para naman makaabot sa Cum Laude (hehe may ambisiyon din naman ako hehe)or mapataas lang ang grades kahit paano para magandang tignan sa application forms sa hinaharap. Para sa mga bumabagsak, eto naman ang biyaya ng Diyos. So sinong nagsabing mahirap ang med? hehehe Kailangan mo lang ipaabot ang grade mo til 73 tapos idaan mo na sa compre hehe. Hindi din naman madaling bumagsak sa med kasi may make-ups, may remedials, at may special projects para sa mga 'ispeysyal' people.

Lately medyo may pagka-addict ako. Tinamaan ako ng 'competitiveness' na akala ko'y matagal ng nawala sa aking sistema. I was at the dean's office with my bff who's running for magna. She's checking her ranking and average kung ok pa ba siya. Her surname comes right before mine, so nakita ko ang average ko. Not bad. In first year, DL ako. 87 something. I havent been able to check my average for 2nd year since they haven't posted it (kahit matatapos na ang isang school year, wala, hidni pa tapos ng secretary ang kung anong anik-anik, kaya di niya mapost). Anyway, I got 84.something something based sa computer records. Ambitiousness! 3 points na lang, sasakto na sa DL. Ibig sabihin, cum laude-ble ang lolo niyo kung sakaling nagpaka-ultimate nerdaks ako this year. Pero sorry na lang, nabrokenhearted ako this year ng ilang beses. Nahumaling sa kung ano-anong bagay. Nalost in translation. Ayan. Ewan ko kung magiging Dl ako this year. Meron pa namang isang taon para rumampa kung sakali. Hmm, o siya, back to my books na nga. At mapuurrrfect nga ang ethics bukas..hahahaha

Simple Life

2009-03-04T19:42:00.000-08:00

Ito ang kinalolokohan ng mga Thomasians. Simple Life. They serve milk and fruit tea drinks using real Jasmine and Woo Long Tea. It's actually quite cheaper than Quickly and Zagu and healthier too (I'm just assuming this. Since they use the real stuff, might be healthier hehe). A large Jasmine Milk Tea (my favorite) cost P55 while medium is priced at P45.

Simple Life is located atthe 2nd floor D2B stall at the UST Parking Complex/Mall.

Vaccines

2009-03-04T18:01:00.000-08:00

I'm making this entry via my phone in the middle of a small group discussion (I'm so bored and also tired of studying for my exams today; still got 3 tests after lunch)

Anyway, recently, I had myself vaccinated in preparation for clerkship cum April 16 (that is if I survive the 3-week exam scheduled starting next week hehe wish me luck?). During my physical exam last week, the doctor required me to have hepa A and B vaccine as well as MMR. I thought my hepa titer's enough na pero they want it more that 1000 kasi we will be exposed to certain situations wherein we might get the infection. Ok fine, though I think ok pa ang 700 plus titer ko ng hepa. Pero MMR? Hello? I've had measles, mumps and german measles na when I was a kid, bakit kailangan ko pa siya?! Hmm, ayoko ng magcomplain so I just had them para tapos na and smooth sailing ang enrolment (again just in case pumasa ako).

Relatively cheap na ang vaccines sa Health Service. Hepa A and B combined, cost P1420, MMR P400, and Influenza P600 (sinama ko na din, mura na sya e) for a total of P2420.

Kahit na mura siya, nafeel ko talaga ang weight ng P2420 noong nagbayad ako. Ack? Ilang dinners na iyan. May kasama pang movie and coffee after. Pero after having my shots narealize ko na ok na din siya since mahilig pa naman kaming kumain ng street food!

Ps: I can't seem to figure out the shortcuts for cut and paste sa nokia e71. The pictures above were suppose to be found at the end of the entry =)

Something Sour

2009-02-24T01:49:00.000-08:00

Cay and I had green mango with alamang after a bad exam. It was so good, I just have to have her a picture of me eating. Wrong move. Looking at the picture, I realized that I am not photogenic. Hehe. If the mango was a product I was suppose to sell, wala ng kakain ng manga na ito. Hehe. Oh well, masarap pa din siya. My teeth felt weird after I finished eating =)

Larga

2009-02-23T06:07:00.000-08:00

Larga! Parang sigaw ni Narda tuwing magtratransform siya into Darna. Feeling ko nung sabado, ito yung naisigaw ni Misterhubs bago kami magdate!

1st stop: Salcedo Market
Food, food and more food. What better way to start the day/date than to have a great brunch with the 'one'. I had my favorite roasted lamb with herb rice. He had his pad thai. We both ordered thai iced tea (his favorite). I ordered an extra dalandan juice (as usual, uhawin ako, laging in heat, daig pa sa naghohot flashes kung mauhaw). We also got ourselves some mango suman (it was my idea since I just love the ripe mango slices wrapped in sweet kakanin) and 2 pcs. of japanese cake (one had cream cheese filling, while the other one had peanut butter and cream cheese).

Food was great, but the company was better. I realized that I eat faster than him even after telling gazillion (ok, exaggeration lang ito) stories about ex's, food trips, and movies. Mcvie eats faster than me. I eat faster than Misterhubs. Ergo, Mcvie eats faster than Misterhubs. Hahaha.

2nd stop: Rockwell
I haven't seen Vicky Cristina Barcelona. Misterhubs saw it already (but not in the big screen). He liked it so much that asking him to watch it again with me wasn't a problem. We zoomed to Powerplant 20 minutes before the showing. We arrived just in time to buy ourselves tickets for the screening. Wala masyadong nanonood (I can hear myself laughing like a villain with a masterplan). PDA time! Hahaha. Joke!

The movie was great. Barcelona is beautiful. Penelope's magnificent (though I was still rooting for Viola Davis that time). I love the fluidity of the story. If it was a Filipino movie, they could've made a lot of bullshit on certain parts of the film. Tagalized Cristina (asking Javier Bardem's character about Elena): Bakit siya dito titira? Bakit? Bakit? Paano na ako? Paano na tayo? (Sabay step back papunta sa sulok ng kuwarto habang humahagulgol with head shaking from left to right, uhog falling, may sigay na 'hindiiiiiii' in between tears, tapos slowly moving to kneeling position) hihihi.

On the way down to the supermarket, Misterhubs saw his ex. He pointed him to me. It's the first time I saw him in person (saw his pix na before). Nagkatinginan pa kami. I found it awkward. Dinaan ko na lang sa smile. Wala namang issue kay Misterhubs iyon.

Stop 3: UST
The previous plan was to go to Salcedo in the morning, Rockwell in the afternoon, Ateneo in the evening. Nasingit bigla ang UST.

There was an intermed school competition last Saturday. Host school was UST. It was a dance and chorale competition. Most of the dancers are my classmates. One of them sold me two tickets and asked me, as in may kasamang pakonsensya, to watch them dance. Ako naman nagpadala hehe. Siyempre, hinatak ko na si Mister. Ok lang naman daw sa kanya.

So there we were zigzagging the metro traffic to go to the Royal Pontifical University. Medyo malayo din ang Rockwell to UST so I spent the time going through his ipod and shuffling the songs. Misterhubs was singing while driving (hindi naman sa buong drive, when he likes the song lang). He's so adorable =) Which reminds me that the next date should be a videoke night hehehe.

We arrived at UST safe and sound. I gave him an impromptu tour of the campus as well as our building, St. Martin de Porres/ Medicine building. Sayang closed ang anatomy lab. I would've wanted to ask him if he was scared of going inside hehe.

Anyway, during the competition, he was cheering for Ateneo Med. I was of course for UST. In the end, our teams lost to PLM in the dance category while UP took home the top prize in the chorale competition. Oh well, we had fun naman watching them perform. (PS: I still think my school rocks hehe)

We had merienda at the shopping center (as Mcvie calls it hehe). I treated him to some UST favorites like the Simple Life Milk Tea and Pasta Boy Pasta. Like a true blue student, we sat at one of the benches (actually hindi siya bench, I don't know what to call the area near the parking lot) near the parking lot while eating. He took pictures pala of our food. I wonder if he's going to make an entry about it one of these days hehe.

Stop 4: Ateneo

After eating, we decided to head to Ateneo to catch BARE. Since I'm not sure how to get there via UP, and Mister is not that road-savvy, I decided to text some friends for directions. Belmar (premed UP) replied via text. Asked me to text her Bf (hardcore Atenean) about it. I texted him, he was not replying. Jay (Atenean) called to tell me where to turn right to go to Katipunan. In the end, nawala pa din kami since hindi ko makita yung stoplight na sinasabi ni Jay. This time I called Bel for directions. She was sleeping kaya ang tagal sagutin ang phone. Thank God when she gave the directions, this time we were able to find our way to Katipunan. For a while there feeling ko hopeless kami, hindi ko mahanap talaga yung stoplight, umabot na kami sa bukana ng FARview. Buti na lang Mister was a very patient and calm driver. =)

We arrived at Ateneo 45 minutes ahead of time. We got hold of the tickets and then met Jay and Jeff. We roamed the campus in search for food. Yeah, parang hindi ako nagmeryenda bago pumunta ng Ateneo di ba? Hehehe. All we found was a vending machine na sira pa! In the end, Jay and Jeff went to 7-11 to buy drinks na lang, while Mister and I queued for the show. Actually I texted Jay to buy me some cookies, pero hindi niya nabasa since naka-off ang phone niya. So water to the max ako! Pantawid gutom!

BARE started a little bit late. Buti na lang we were one of the earliest who fell in line so we were able to get good seats when they started letting people in. Airconditioning was terrible pala at the venue. Even the actors were dripping wet during the production. We were seated near (near lang talaga, not infornt) a fan so kahit paano lumalamig sa side namin.

Anyway, the play's great. It reminded me of RENT. The songs were catchy and the actors cute (hehehe siyempre my date's waaaayyy hotter).

Stop 5: Bannaple
After the show we decided to grab something to eat before going home. Jay suggested Bannaple. I was so hungry to even think of another option. I like Bannaple. Tinie brought me there last year when I was in my 'drama' stage.

Anyway, at Bannapple, Mister ordered dessert (bannoffee and strawberry cheesecake) while I had their Herbed Chicken as per suggestion of Jay. It was yummy and filling. Parang Chocolate Kiss meal but more affordable.

After dinner, Mister dropped me home. He drove from Katipunan to Manila para lang ihatid ako. I was all smiled (hehe). Hay, it was a great date. One for the books. Larga kung larga. I'm looking forward to the next one na =)

The Letter E has found a Mister

2009-02-17T03:39:00.000-08:00

The letter E is in a relationship =)

The truth about friends and crushes

2009-02-11T15:52:00.000-08:00

Some classmates are ticking me off. Can't they just get off my back? It's been a month already since I stopped seeing my classmate romantically. It didn't work out. Ok naman kami e. We talk, we have drinks. Ang hindi ko maintindihan ay kung bakit sobrang involved ang ibang mga tao. I mean, I understand what his barkada felt. Fine. Ang hindi ko ma-take ay yung mga nakikisali sa issue. I though friends ko sila, but then hindi pala. I'm really disappointed with one person in particular. I've been really close to her since 1st year. It just so happened na she belongs to classmate's subsction. Hindi naman sila barkada so I really don't know what her thing about me is.

Whenever we talk, ok naman kami. Until I learned from one of my close friends na she's been badmouthing me when she's around her other friends. Nainis pa ako kanina when she started inquiring about my plans for Sunday. Hay. Ang hirap mag-fake ng smile and just tell her to fuck off. And what's so special about Sunday? Turns out people in class know a thing or two about twitter. Fine. A crush is a crush. But the thing is, I hang out with my other crushes and wala namang big deal about it. I watch a movie with them. I have lunch or dinner din. I don't know what's so special about this na they are making a big deal out of it sa class. Crush does not translate to a romantic relationship. Friendship pwede pa. Sobrang kakikitid ng utak ng iba. Just in case they get to read this, I'm going out on Sunday to spend time with my friends, it just turns out that I have crushes there. Emphasis on the word 'crushes'. I might go out din with them on Saturday. The thing is I have a lot of crushes and I like them because they are either great writers/bloggers, good conversationalist, fashionistas or good looking. In short admiration lang naman.

Anyway, I'm going back to class na. Hopefully, hindi na ako kulitin ni former friend at baka masungitan ko pa siya. Mahirap na, kulang pa naman ako ng sleep. Hmm, I'll try my best to flash her my teeth (my version of smile sa mga taong nakakainis) na lang.

Isang Malaking Pagkakamali

2009-02-09T01:49:00.001-08:00

At the recent V-day party:

I was seated on the sofa when I thought I saw one of the fabcasters, Gibbs, standing near the kitchen. Since lagi ko siyang nakikita sa mga plays, I thought I'd introduce myself. So lumapit ako. Nasa may pintuan nakatambay sila Jamie. In my very, very confident tone, I said: Hi Gibbs, I'm Eugene, I always see you sa mga events, nahiya lang ako mag-Hi. Yada, yada, yada. Natawa si Gibbs. Natawa sila Jamie. Natawa sila Mugen. Turns out Gibbs isn't Gibbs. Late ang tunay na Gibbs. Sabi ni 'Gibbs': I'm not Gibbs (while suppresing his laughter. It was really kind of him). As in, I wanted to disappear at that very moment. Nakakahiya. Buti sila Jamie lang nakarinig. Ack! Haha. I could not think of anything to say. All I could muster was "kamukha mo kasi e". One of the guys retorted: hindi kaya, yada yada, yada. I felt myself turn red. Sabi ko, "sa shape ng face at eyes siguro" sabay flash ng smile. I quickly returned to the sofa.

When the real Gibbs came, I didn't introduce myself na.

Parrrttttyyy

2009-02-05T07:36:00.000-08:00

Do you guys know a place where we could host a party that could accommodate around 400 people? We, the presidents of sections A, B, C and D, were thinking of throwing a post-third year, pre-clerkship party for our batch after the final day of exams on the 27th of March.

I really don't think everyone would attend, but just to make sure, we're looking for a place that could house around 400 people at one time. I hope someone could suggest a place that is not that expensive. Kuripot ang mga tao sa med and since the fee would come from our own pockets, the cheaper it is the better. Usual party sa med naman is drinks and music lang. People would go there to hang out, talk, and sometimes dance. Parang having coffee lang sa Starbucks, palitan mo lang ng alak yung kape =). Wala ng sit-down dinner of sorts.

We're aiming for a night party on the 27th of March. Again, if you have contacts, help?

Kuwento ko lang: One of my ex's who now teach at rehab sciences organized a party this Saturday at Prince of Jaipur for the student council. Ticket were priced at 300 bucks each. Mura na no? May 2 free drinks pa iyan. The place is exclusively for rehab sciences students til 11 pm. After that, they open the doors to outsiders. I was asking him for details kanina, pero medyo secretive. I was inquiring him kung how much ginastos nila for the place. For sure may kickback sila diyan no. Ayaw sabihin. Basta mura lang daw.

Anyway, maybe you're curious on why we wanted to hold a party? Well sa laki ng population namin, not all of us know each other. We need an event wherein people could interact and somehow be comfortable with each other since we'd be working together for the coming school year (that is we all pass 3rd year, good lord please pass us all! please. especially me =) hehe). God knows clerkship is way toxic than being a student.

So, for the nth time, if you have connections, can you please help me out? Please please? We want to make it bongga! Hahaha message me here?

Silicon

2009-02-05T03:53:00.000-08:00

Nakahawak ka na ba ng fake na boobs? I mean yung niretoke? Nasubukan mo na bang pisil-pisilin at i-compare sa natural, unaltered ones? Ako hindi. At feeling ko hindi ako makakahawak nito sa tanang buhay ko. Kaya nga nung nagdala kanina si doc ng silicon implants sa class at pinass around, hindi ko na pinalampas ang pagkakataon at hinawakan ko siya, pinisil-pisil at nilagay sa loob ng uniform ko (may undershirt naman ako siyempre) at kinapa kung ano ang feel niya kapag nakalagay na sa breast ng tao at kinapa mo. Wala. Parang naglagay ka ng bag ng gelatin sa boobs. Pero siyempre iba pa rin ang feel niya kapag under the skin na!

Anyway, since masyado akong natuwa, pinicturan ko siya.

Nagpapicture na din ako kasama siya. Mukha akong manyakis sa pix kasi halatang tuwang-tuwa ako. Hehehe.

Biboness pa ako. Since si doc ang authority when it comes to any surgery sa breast, nagtanong ako kung paano malalaman kung retokado ang boobs na nakikita mo kung hindi mo siya hahawakan. Natawa lang siya at nagtanong kung bakit napakainterested ko sa topic na iyon. Natawa na lang din ako. Nacucurious lang naman kasi ako e. Sabi ng kaklase ko, pahigain ko daw yung girl, tapos tignan kung magmomove ang breast tissue. Naturally, magsa-sag siya towards the side. Ang retokado daw e nakapoint pa din straight ahead. In fairness parang madami na siyang nakitang boobs hehe. Hay naku, as if naman may mapapaganyan akong babae sa kama unless physical exam siya talaga.

Just to share, right now dalawa ang klase ng implants na ginagamit sa breast enhancement o kaya reconstruction (sa mga nagpamastectomy, uso ito sa states dahil sobrang bothered sila sa image nila, dito daw hindi popular). Yung nasa picture yung silicon. Yung isa naman e yung saline-filled.

Yung silicon implant unang nagamit sa Texas. Super craze siya sa US noong naintroduce. Kaso may time na naban siya dahil nagkaroon ng study na nakakacause siya ng breast cancer. Well, totoo naman iyon. Kapag nagrupture iyong bag niya at nagcontact sa breast tissure, studies show na nagcaucause siya ng breast CA. Pero kung hindi naman, e relatively safe. Ano ba ang mga actvities na nagcaucause ng rupture? Trauma to the breast ang pinakacommon. Kung malas ka, minsan nagrurupture siya ng kusa. Pero with the technology now, relatively resilient naman ang mga ito.

Ang saline-filled naman ay naimbento noong na-pull-out ang silicon implants. Safe siya kasi kahit na magrupture, i-a-absorb lang ng breast tissue ang fluid. No cancer risk. Ang pangit nga lang sa kanya, after several years unti-unting naaabsorb ng tissue ang saline. So in short lumiliit ang implant ng kusa. Kung malas ka, at hindi pantay ang absorption ng fluid, lilitaw na hindi pantay ang size ng breast mo. Dito lamang ang silicon kasi it stays the way it was nung una siyang nilagay sa boobs mo. Iyon nga lang dapat nice quality ang implant mo. There are fake implants that usually cake or harden by itself.

Isa pang funny thing with silicon implants is that when you shake them, wala kang maririnig na fluid movement unlike yung sa saline-filled. Sinubukan ko nga kanina, and totoo nga, nagmomove ang fluid sa loob pero walang sound! Amazing!

Anyway, tama na itong boobie talk baka mapagkamalan na akong straight hahaha.

25 Things About Me

2009-02-04T05:43:00.000-08:00

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

1. I'm a sucker for meg ryan films. The old, romance genre she left behind when she and hubby david divorced. My favorites were You've got mail and Addicted to love.

2. When I was in elementary, I was an x-men addict. I would collect comics and trading cards. Nakumpleto ko ata yung cards dati e. On one occasion, I made a bet with my neighbor. Ang pusta, xmen trading cards. Natalo ako. Bye bye xmen cards. I was so sad that time, I spent days thinking of ways on how I could retrieve my cards back. Naisip ko ang hirap! Di ko na tinuloy.

3. Dati, I had a hard time filling up the "Where did you attend elementary?" entries sa mga forms. Nakailang schools kasi ako dati bago ako nag 'settle down' sa Bayanihan Institute (antique Chinese school sa Tarlac). Nursery to Grade 1 Montessorri ako. Grade 2 Bayanihan Institute kasi gusto nila matuto ako mag-Chinese. Grade 3 nilipat ako sa College of the Holy Spirit para daw may first communion. Grade 4 nag Don Bosco ako kasi automatic na nililipat ng CHS ang mga male students nila sa DBTI pagdating ng grade 4. Grade 5 binalik nila ako sa Bayanihan Institute kasi kung di daw ako mag-aaral ng Chinese, e hindi ako matutong magsulat at magsalita. Ang dami di ba? So dati, nililiitan ko pa ang sulat ko para lang magkasya siya sa box/line sa form. Nagyon, isa na lang sinusulat ko. Kasi tinatanong na lang nila e kung saan ka nag-graduate ng elementary hindi na ang history.

4. Loner ako. Nung bata mahilig na akong gumala mag-isa. Grade six ako nung una akong manood ng pelikula sa sinehan mag-isa. Nakapanood pa nga ako ng The Talented Mr. Ripley noon e, nagsinungaling lang ako about my age hehehe

5. Naisipan kong magpari dati. When I was in DBTI, every Sunday nasa simbahan ako. Tumutulong ako sa Sacristi. Kabaybs ko non ang mga bro at fathers. Minsan nasasali din ako sa mass. Enjoy naman. Masaya naman kasama sila father. Kapag nagtuturo sila, naeenganyo akong magpari. Now looking back, naisip ko, ano kayang nangyari sa akin kung nagpari nga ako hehe

6. My all time favorite subject is Physics. Iyon iyong subject na naramdaman kong matalino pala ako. Pinadadala ako sa mga contest saan-saan. Enjoy naman kasi nadadalian ako sa subject. Kailangan mo lang memorized ang formula, tapos! Gamitan lang ng imagination, papasa ka na. Kaya nung entrance exam, ang mga choices ko nun na course e puro engineering. Siyempre ayaw ng mama, gusto niya med. In the end, PT ang kinuha ko. Hindi ako nag-eenjoy noong first year. Nagustuhan ko langs iya kasi nung 2nd year may isang taon kaming physics. As usual, tumataginting ang grades ko noon. After that, nagustuhan ko na siya, Naapply namin ang physics (torque) sa treatment ng mga patients noon e.

7. Sa sobrang payat ko nung bata, gabundok na kanin ang laging binibigay sa akin ng mama at lola ko. Nasanay ako kumain ng kanin na konti lang ang ulam. I grew to love the feel of rice in my mouth. Gusto ko yung dry na long grain. Ngayong pagtanda, nahihirapan akong magcut down sa rice, since nakalakihan ko na siya.

8. Mahilig akong kumain. Dahil nga payat ako, lagi akong ineencourage na kumain..kumain ng madami. Sinanay na ako ng mama at lola ko. Lagi kapag may handaan, sinasama ako. Kapag kakain kami sa Manila, laging sa Tong Yang sa QC. Kasi nga pinapataba nila kaming magkakapatid. Kaya sanay akong kumain ng madami. Nag-eenjoy ako sa mga buffet at food fairs =) No wonder, tumaba ako nung college!

9. I discovered my love for reading one summer when I was in the barrio. Pinadadala ako lagi ng lola ko sa isang maliit na baryo sa Nueva Ecija tuwing bakasyon after mamatay ng dad ko. Wala namang bata doon. Walang cable. Puro tito, tita ko lang ang nandoon. Sa sobrang liit na barrio, magkakakilala lahat ng tao doon. Isang araw, bored na bored ako, pinagkakalkal ko yung mga gamit ng tita ko. May mga libro siyang maganda ang cover. I scanned them. Hindi ko type, walang picture.

After a few days, wala ulit magawa, kinuha ko yung mga libro at sinimulang basahin. I liked them. After that, nagpapabili na ako ng libro sa mama ko. Una tuwang-tuwa pa siya. pero nung medyo napapadalas na ang pagpapabili ko, napapagalitan na ako. hehe. Ang libro pala na binasa ko nung time na iyon ay Nancy Drew. Hahahaha.

10. I have a scar on my left temporoparietal area (in short sa ulo). Malikot kasi ako nung bata. Naglalaro kami, natulak ako, tumama ang ulo ko sa poste. Di ko man namalayan na dumudugo siya until lumapit ang nanay ng classmate ko at pinunas ang dugo sa ulo ko. Dali-dali akong binuhat ng teacher ko at dinala sa pinakamalapit na ospital. Ginupit nila ang buhok ko at tinahi ang sugat ko. I remember na hindi naman siya masakit. Di ako inanesthesia nung time na iyon. Basta ang naaalala ko lang e, gising ako tapos may mga taong nakapaligid sa akin conversing. Pinag-uusapan nila kung nararamdaman ko kaya ang tahi.

The next day, pumasok ako sa class. Sikat ako. Ginagawa akong example lagi ng teachers. "kung ayaw niyo matulad kay eugene, wag maging malikot.."

11. I'm quite emotional. Sa aming pamilya ako iyong dapat hindi sinasabihan ng problema kasi sobra akong affected lagi. In terms of relationship, I get too emotional during break-ups or fight. Kapag may problema yung iba, naiisip ko lagi.

12. I'm a romantic. Feeling ko nga mali ako sa bagay na ito. hindi naman uso sa amin ang ligawan or 'getting to know you'. Mabilisan lagi. Mahilig ako sa surprises and sweet nothings. Hehehe

13. Frustrated musician ako. I was enrolled in a class noon sa Yamaha. How to play the Organ. I didn't even last a week. Nahirapan ako. I also had guitar lessons. Didn't learn a thing.

14. I love watching movies. Kahit ano. Tagalog, english, french, spanish, basta may subtitle carry na iyan! Hindi naman ako masyadong mapili. Nanonood din ako ng no-brainer films. Yung tipong slapstick, uupo ka lang para tumawa.

15. I try to go to mass every Sunday. I'm not that religious pero kung hindi ako nakapag-mass ng Sunday, hindi ako mapalagay. Ewan kung bakit. takot siguro ako kay Lord.

16. I don't like Mob Wars. Di ko magets kung bakit natutuwa ang mga tao doon. e pindot ka lang ng pindot. Puro text lang nakikita ko. Wala man lang simulation na ginagawa mo iyong crime na iyon.

17. I want to have children in the future. Dati gusto ko nga parang united Colors of Benetton. One of each nationality.

18. I want to teach. Part of my goals in life iyan. Teach PT siguro or med, wherever may opportunity.

19. I am still undecided on what to do after graduating. I'm still thinking whether to take up residency here or abroad. Di ko pa din alam which specialty ang kukunin ko. Right now, Radiology lang pumapasok sa isipan ko.

20. I have several Lacoste shirts..all of them fake hahaha ang mahal naman kasi for a shirt. I remember trying out a shirt sa Hong Kong na store nila. Medyo mas mura doon, and hindi nakakaguilty gumastos kasi, ang mindset mo maliit na gastos lang siya since wala pa syang 1000 HKD. In the end hindi ko din binili. Ginastos ko na lang sa UNIQLO yung pera ko. Mas madami pa akong nabili.

21. Mas gusto ko ang Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf kaysa sa Starbucks. mas gusto ko ang Seattle's Best kaysa sa Starbucks.

22. I have this thing about stopping and staring at my crushes. Sa med, kapag nakakasalubong ko siya, napapatulala ako. Minsan binabatukan ako nila Cay kai parang obvious daw. Hehehe

23. Insomniac ako! Kaya lagi akong puyat at lagi ding late sa class.

24. I'm not good at writing..in straight english. taglish talaga ako. If may pinagsisisihan ako, ito yung hindi ko nahiligan ang magsulat in English. Kahit magsalita. Kaya obvious naman, taglish itong entry na ito.

25. Allergic ako sa alcoholic beverages pero umiinom pa din ako. Minsan kinakati na ako, hindi ko lang pinapahalata. Pinipigilan ko ang sarili ko. Buti na lang hindi namamaga ang mga mata at lips ko. O kaya ay nagkakapantal.

Favorite

2009-02-04T03:49:00.001-08:00

Paborito ako ng immediate past (dahil nagpapalit kami ng prof after every shift) prof ko sa OB 2..paboritong tawagin sa klase. Since alphabetical kaming pinauupo ng mga prof sa klase nila (for easy grading as well as for recitation purposes) lagi akong nasa unang row.

Itong si doktora ay isa sa mga heavyweights ng OB. Tipong grand momma ba. May libro kaming ginagamit sa class kung saan co-author siya. Siya din ang past department chair ng OB. Typical Filipina si doc. Petite, mahilig magkuwento (aside sa mga lectures) at paborito ang kape. Starbucks na Caramel Macchiato. Dagdagan mo pa ng Belgian Waffles. Iyan ang lagi niyang biro sa amin tuwing lectures. Kung may malalate or mahuhuli siyang natutulog sa klase, iyan ang iuutos niyang ibili sa kanya sa nearby Starbucks (siyempre biro lang).

Medyo may mood din si doktora. Lahat naman ata ng naging prof namin may certain ugali. Yung iba e laging late. Yung iba masungit. Yug iba terror. Yung iba mahilig manigaw ng estudyante. Iba naman sarcastic. Si doktora, medyo sensitive sa ingay. Isa siya sa mga prof na konting kaluskus lang, konting bulong, naririnig. Ganon kasensitive ang tenga niya. Siyempre magagalit iyon. Pero apologize ka lang, bati na kayo. Peace on earth and peace sa class.

So kaninang umaga, siya ang lecturer sa OB2. As usual, late na naman ako..ng gising. 7 am ang klase namin. Nagising ako sa 6 am alarm ko. Pinatay ko siya at natulog muli thinking na magigsing naman ako in 10 minutes. 10 minutes pa tapos babangon na ako. Nagising ako 7:10. Nagising ako sa text ng kaklase ko na nandito na nagsasabing nasa class na si doc. As usual, nainis ako sa sarili ko. nagmadali akong maligo at magbihis. Habang naliligo nakatanggap na naman ako ng ikalawang text galing sa kaklase ko. Hinahahanap daw ako ni doc. Ack. Ang hirap naman ng ganito. Bakit iyong iba, malalate, aabsent, mag-cucut ng class, di naman hinahanap. Bakit ako, minemention palagi in front of the class? In my case, in front of a combined class, estimated to have 200 students. Ack! I texted back: nakakahiya pumasok, aabsent na lang ako. See you prevemed.

Pagdating ko sa school, unang bungad ng mga kaklaseng nakasalubong ko sa hallway: uy sikat, hanap ni doctora. Sabay tawa. Natawa na lang ako. Pagdating ko sa classroom, ganoon ulit. Iba't-iba lang ng paraan ng pagsabi. Depending on their closeness to me. Yung friends lang ganito: uy hinanap ka ni doctora. Yung mas close ko: hahaha absent ka, hinanap ka ni doctora. sabi niya pumasok ka daw sa Friday, siya ulit lecturer! Sabay hagikgik. O kaya'y "late ka na naman!" sabay kurot.

Naisip ko na lang. Bakit ba ako natatandaan ni doc? Hindi naman ako ang highest sa mga exam sa OB. Hindi din naman masyadong pala recite. Ang naisip ko lang na rason kung bakit nagstick sa mind niya ang name ko e dahil sa akin niya pinauuwi lagi ang kanyang white board marker at eraser..at dahil lagi akong late, feeling ko nagstick na sa mind niya ang pangalan ko tuwing hahanapin niya ang mga iyon at the start of my class.

Pwede ding naalala niya ako dahil lagi ko siyang binabati sa hallway. Good morning. Good afternoon. Laging sagot niya: what's good in the morning/afternoon? Ang typical answer ko: I saw you doktora (ehehehe), sabay flash ng smile. Napapangiti na lang siya sabay bigkas ng: bolero!

Hay, I love doktora. She's one of the few profs in med na I really like. Concerned kasi siya sa students. Anyway, I made a mental note to myself, not to be absent/late sa Friday. Ayokong mamiss ang last lecture niya for our batch.

Iba't ibang posisyon

2009-02-02T23:55:00.000-08:00

Nalate ako sa aking 7 am class kanina dahil hindi ako nagising. Hindi kasi ako makatulog kagabi. Tinamaan na naman ako ng aking insomnia. Kaninang pagpasok ko sa klase, wala akong ginawa kundi matulog, matulog at matulog sa iba't-ibang posisyong pupwede habang nakaupo.

Medicine

Nagdidiscuss si doctora tungkol sa heart murmurs. May demo pa siya na ikinatuwa ng lahat. Using her fingers and the microphone, sinisimulate niya ang iba't-ibang heart sounds, normal at abnormal. With matching sound effects pa iyan ha. Minsan pinipigilan na naming humagikgik dahil nakakatawa talaga ang pangagaya ni doktora. Pero siyempre bilib kami kasi she's willing to make a fool of herself in order to shape us fools into becoming one of them. Anyway, nakaupo ako sa harap since ako ang presidente ng klase. In fairness hindi naman ako nakatulog agad. Medyo nung nakalahati na niya ang lecture saka ako nakaidlip. Nakanganga pa daw according sa aking seatmate. Siyempre hindi niya napansin nung simula kasi sobra siyang preoccupied sa lecture ni doctora. Feeling ko may pangarap maging cardiologist itong lokong ito e. Anyway, nung tingin ng tingin sa tabi niya si doktora saka lang niya ako napansin na tulog. Siyempre, like any good friend, ginising niya ako sa pamamagitan ng isang kurot sa braso. Kung hindi ko lang siya kaibigan e nahampas ko siya ng di oras. Nagulat kasi ako e hehe. Taht was the moment na nafeel kong mauulit pa ito sa ibang subjects.

Ophthalmology

Nakakatakot matulog sa subject na ito dahil may temper ang aming prof. Medyo sensitive siya sa mga ganyang bagay. Nung unang pagkakataon na may mga nakatulog sa klase niya, e naglitanya ito sa na sisiguraduhin niyang babagsak kaming lahat sa mga exams niya. In fairness naman kay doc, madali siya magpaquiz. Tipong give-away na ang mga tanong. Nung nagalit siya medyo nanginig ang tuhod namin. Paano ba naman may ganito pa siyang nalalaman: "I teach at UP as well, and if you know anyone studying medicine there, they'd know how hard my exams are. Now, if I see anyone sleeping in my class again, I'll make sure you will fail my subject and repeat third year!". O di ba? Winner. Sino ba ang may gustong umulit ng third year? Diyos ko po, ito ang pinaka dreaded year ko. Feeling ko noon wala ng tatalo sa pharma noong second year. Pero huwag ka, ang third year nakakadrain ng energy. Gumising ka ba naman ng 7 am araw-araw?!!

Anyway, so back to ophtha class. Nakaupo kami ng alphabetical. Since nasa first part ako ng class, ang seat ko ay yung may cushion. Pinakahate ko ang upuang ito. Kahit gaano pa siya kacomfortable, ayaw na ayaw ko ito dahil at 1 pm, katatapos lang kumain ng lunch, sure na sure na makakatulog ako. At nakatulog nga ako. In between lectures on kaposi's sarcoma and CMV retinitis, nakaidlip ako ng di ko namalayan. Ang nakakatakot pa dito, I was facing my prof and I'm seated within his viewpoint. On my part naman, I always try hard to keep myself awake during ophtha class. Ayokong maging dahilan para mapahirapan kami. I'm sure hindi lang ako nag-iisa sa ganyang mga bagay-bagay.

So ayun nga, nakatulog akong nakaharap kay doc, with one arm tucked at the back of my head. Naimagine ko ang takot sa mukha ng kaklase kong nakaupo 2 rows away from me nung napansin niyang nakatulog ako. With all her might daw sinubukan niyang ipagising ako sa katabi ko na nakikinig intently kay doc. Successful naman siya. Nagising nila ako with one tap on the shoulder. Ayos, safe!

Surgery

Ay ito nakatulog ako safely. Since 200 kaming umattend ng lecture I was safely tucked somewhere along the row of bibo students listening to a guest lecturer from the states. Alumnus ng UST. Surgeon based sa LA. Kahit stateside, nakakaantok maglec. Paano kausap lang niya the entire time ang white board. Parang eavesdropper kami sa kanyang tete-a-tete with the board hehe. Ayon, natulog na lang ako.

Urology
Eto isang matinding feat. Nakatabi ko ang pinakamahilig matulog sa amin sa class. Somewhere in the lec nakatulog ako. I bet nakatulog din siya, pero nauna ako. Ang bestfriends, ayan, pinagtawanan ako sa aking style ng pagtulog. Seriousness daw ang face. Parang intently listening sa lec pero lost na lost daw ako somewhere else. Siyempre nagising ako sa hagik-hikan. Tamang tama namang napatingin si doc sa side namin. Tinawag ang katabi kong natutulog. Di na gising. Tinawag ulit. Deadma. Nagtawanan lahat. Kinalbit ko na siya para magising. Ayon, effective. Buti naman. Good thing mabait ang prof kanina at hindi siya pinagtripan. Puro about penises and testis pa naman ang topic kanina.

Kailangan makatulog ako later on time ng hindi ako antukin bukas. mahirap na't baka hindi na ako maging ganito kaswerte makaiwas sa mga prof hehe.

Dance the cha cha

2009-02-02T09:27:00.000-08:00

Family Crossover Buffet

2009-02-02T07:09:00.000-08:00

I had fun last Sunday trying out Dusit Thani Makati's Family Sunday Brunch. For 1450, we got to try different cuisine from their 4 restaurants namely UMU, Benjarong, Basix and Tosca. Mura na siya for a hotel buffet. I was surprised pa when we got there kasi ang ganda ng interiors niya.

This is the band they give you after you pay for the buffet. This band signifies that you are part of the crossover buffet.

The not so fancy poster at the lobby

Umu; Japanese Resto

Tosca; Italian Resto

Benjarong; Thai Restaurant

Basix; Classic International Dishes

These were the signage placed within the lobby and near the 4 main restaurants to help direct guests to the participating establishments.

I had my picture taken with the performers at the lobby.

Our main resto; Whenever we go to the 3 other restos, we would go back to UMU since this is where we were billeted.

Some of the pictures I took while at UMU

These were from Benjarong

Some photos taken from Basix

Their extensive wine collection. There is even free flowing sparkling wine mixed with either apple or orange juice inclusive of the buffet.Tosca!

Reminds me of Spiral hehe

Random pictures at the lobby

When they don't like you

2009-02-01T17:39:00.000-08:00

What would you feel if you suddenly learned that your bf's sister, the one you've been friends way before you became her brother's bf, doesn't like you? I mean, ayaw niya sayo for her brother. Ito ang dilemma ng friend ko ngayon. She's known the sister long before naging sila ng kapatid nito. Hindi naman sila barkada or the best of friends, pero they would hang out once in a while, say hi when they bump into each other in the mall or even at school (the sister is a resident at UST).

She learned about it from a batchmate. Batchmate was in a party where she was introduced to the sister because they were from the same med school. Sister then went on to make small conversation with batchmate. Conversation topics ranged from med stuffs to boys and ended with sister telling a story of how she and her family hates her bro's gf. She went on to say things that were not really nice. Batchmate just kept her mouth shut and pretended to be concerned and interested. Batchmate then informed my friend about what her bf's sister said. Friend didn't know how to react. Of course she was hurt. She thought she and sister were tight. But then she didn't know if she should confront sister or just shut up and pretend she didn't know anything. She decided to inform bf of what she learned. Bf was angry with his sister and told gf that he will confront them. Gf then told bf not to, and just let her talk to sister since they are friends.

Ang problema friend doesn't really know what to do. She asked me for advice. Should she confront sister or not? I told her not to since it will just create more tension between them. Would confronting her make sister like her more? Definitely no. Sabi ko, analyze sister's issue with her and maybe she could do something to fix it. Baka kasi may valid reason naman ang inis nila sa kanya.

Friend eventually texted sister and told her she knew all about the things she said. She told her how hurt she was about what she learned because she thought they were friends. She didn't get a reply. Friend thinks that sister is probably 'nahihiya' since 'nabuking' siya. I have a different point of view. I thought na kung ako yung sister, lalo akong maiinis sa gf ng bf ko for confronting me. Ewan. Poeple have the prerogative to not like you. Hindi naman lahat ng tao mamamangha sayo and will accept you with open arms. It just turns out na yung taong may ayaw sa kanya e sister ng bf niya. It's a hard situation to be in, pero what can you do? It's either you suck up or you alienate them. I don't know which one is better.

Friend now is thinking na baka dahil ayaw nila sa kanya, eventually siya ang mag give up sa relationship. Hindi ko alam ipapayo ko.

Anyone ever been into this kind of situation? O baka may opinion kayo? Wanna share?

All the (Malignant) Breast in the World

2009-01-28T23:13:00.000-08:00

Ang sakit ng ulo ko. Didn't get much sleep last night. Studied for the cardio exam. In short antok na antok ako ngayong araw. After the exam, nafefeel ko na na magkakamigraine ako later in the day. Now I'm definitely sure I'm having one.

Nadesensitize na ako sa suso. Suso= Breast. Breast ng mga babae. Not the nice, smooth, watermelon kind but those with bulging, bleeding, ulcerating malignant lesions.

Our lesson for today sa surgery is on malignant breast cancers. Nung una tolerable pa sya. As in sa simula hanggang OMG lang ang reaction, breast lesion pix mixed with pix of pinoy celebrities in their b-day suit: the likes of ara mina, diana zubiri, aubrey miles...) nung naglaon, palala ng palala na ang mga photos, tipong ayaw mo ng tignan. Nagpapasalamat na nga lang ako at hindi ako pinanganak na gurlaloo!

I was asking nga, bakit kaya umaabot ng ganoon kalala yung mga suso ng mga ito? I mean macerated na nga ang boobs nila, may ulcer na, bleeding, di pa nila pinapacheck-up?! Di ba nila naiisip na hindi normal ang mga nangyayari sa boobies nila? Hay.

Buti na lang aliw si doc maglec. Medyo manyakis ang dating hehe. Hay, ang bigat naman ng lec na ito. Inaantok na nga ako, makakita pa ako ng mga boobs..boobs na may kung ano-ano! It was enough to trigger my migraine!

Ngek

2009-01-26T07:15:00.001-08:00

Naisip ko lang. Hindi pala ako makakapagtipid in the end ngayong linggo.

Una, I promised a friend na I'll treat him sa Chinese food sa Sabado. Hehe, pambawi sa kasalanan ko na kakacancel sa kanya. (Hi friend, I know you blog, hopefully when you read this, huwag ka magcomment hehe baka malaman nilang iniindiyan kita lagi. Peace na tayo kanina hehehe)

Pangalawa, nangako din pala ako sa isa pang friend na I'll hang-out with him sa Friday (Hmm, sandali lang. Kailangan nauna ito sa above paragraph since mauuna itong mangyari this week..anyway, tinatamad akong baguhin pa ito hehe). So in short butas ang bulsa ko this week!

Oh well, I'll just do the best that I can hehe.

Tipid at Distractions

2009-01-26T06:58:00.000-08:00

I'm starting to save by cutting on some unnecessary expenses like taking the trike on my way home and studying outside. Not taking the trike saves me P20. Not studying at Starbucks or any other coffeeshop saves me around P500 a day. Why P500? Well, coffee/tea budget is usually P200. Depending on which branch I go to, cab fare would probably range about P100-150 one way only. Di pa kasama meryenda diyan hehe.

What's with the tipid mode? Well, I just bought a clear case for my macbook as well as a vga cable. I used my credit card (extension lang nung kay nanay since palamunin pa ako! hehe) so I have to pay my mom for it. I also got a new pair of glasses last week since tumaas na ang grado ko. What else? Hmm, I'm planning to tag along with people who are watching Zsa Zsa Zaturnnah this February. Wala pa naman namemention na dates, so just in case bibili sila ng ticket, may extra money na ako from my savings.

I think, test na din ito ng saving powers ko. Medyo magastos kasi ako e. I'm matching diet with saving din. Nagbabaon na din ako para makatipid. Ang goal is not to buy food unless gutom na talaga ako. Mahal din ang caf food namin sa Med Building e. Ang problema weakness ko talaga yung sweet drinks. May moment na nagcracrave talaga ako ng soda or iced tea o kaya milk tea at di ako mapakali kahit uminom ako ng baong water. Pinipigilan ko na lang ang sarili ko. hehe. Today, I milk tea. Tom, I'm aiming for no extra drinks aside from water. In line na din iyan ng pagpapapayat ko. Well wala din kaming lunchbreak so ok na din na may baon ako. As in 7 am to 5 pm diredirecho! Yung 1 hr lunchbreak namin, kinuha na ng lecheng prev med para sa exam ng module kasi walang pasok sa UST ng Wednesday (Yey!).

Heniway, ang pinakaproblema ko now e distractions. I mean, nahihirapana akong mag-aral sa bahay dahil may net. Kapag may net, napapatwitter ako, blog, multiply, friendster at facebook! Parang ngayon hehe.

Hay buhay. Ang hirap i-discipline ang sarili ha. Kating-kati ako magkape sa labas kanina. Nag-gym na lang ako instead. Ngayon, dapat nag-aaral ako, pero heto gumagawa ako ng entry..at nagtwetweet! Ack hehe

Anyway, hopefully makaipon ako this month! Wish me luck!

Torture

2009-01-22T20:34:00.000-08:00

When my friends were having their initiations sa sor/frat nila, we started discussing about stuffs na gagawin namin kung kami ang maghahandle ng hazing. Eto yung naisip ko noon. hehehe.

Only wearing shorts (boxers or undies pwede din hahaha kung girls dapat may bra, yokong makakita ng boobs!), hands tied sa bedposts, legs spread apart (kinky no?) haha tapos kikilitiin sila sa feet and sa armpits for 2 hours. Hahaha walang pahinga. As in! Gagawin ko ito sa mga masusungit, mga badtrip at mga hindi marunong ngumiti. hahaha

just the thought of it makes me shmyle. =)

Tantrum

2009-01-22T19:04:00.000-08:00

Gusto kong magtantrum. Magawala. Sumigaw.

Gusto kong pumunta sa gitna ng med lobby, o kaya sa hospital lobby or better yet sa field, drop my bags, close my eyes, flap my arms like a child and just scream out loud. Really scream to the point of shrieking.

I want to curse, punch on something or kick someone.

I'm in that kind of mood today.

I wanted to trip someone kanina sa inis. One of my new prof is an asshole. Well, nagpost sila ng announcement sa bullboard na pwede ng kunin ang handouts for today sa office nila. When I went there, wala ang secretary nila. One of the doctors asked me kung ano sadya ko doon. I asked her for the handouts for the new module. She pointed out the handouts na hindi pa naxerox. Sabi niya, return later and check kung nagawa na ng secretary. So umalis ako. I returned during the break sarado ang office. Oh well, baka nag-cr break ang secretary. Bumalik na naman ako after another class. Sarado pa din. Pagkatapos ng 5 pm class namin, binalikan ko siya, at sarado pa din. So in short wala kaming schedule ng topics for today.

Fast forward 8 am, neuro room. nandoon na si doctora. She told me to get the handouts na. I went to the office, wala na naman ang secretary pero nandoon yung doc (let's call him X). I told him na kukunin ko ang handouts for the neonatology module. Nagalit! Wednesday pa daw nakagawa yung handouts, bakit ngayon ko lang kukunin...yada yada yada. Di ko na pinatulan. Aga-aga panira ng mood. Pero inis talaga ako sa kanya. So I went to the class to distribute the handouts. First lecturer gave a talk on common complications on the neonate brought about by pregnancy. Second lecturer, dumating si X, introduced himself (module leader pala siya, kainis), and before starting the lecture, started saying: yung handouts na iyan gawa na nung Wednesday pa. Walang kumuha so ngayon lang niyo nakuha. Then he looked straight at me. There was a millisecond na nag-isip ako, do I suck it all in or let it out. Leche. I raised my hand and said: Doc, the announcement was posted yesterday, I went there and Dra. so and so told me to comeback because it wasn't photocopied yet. When I came back, your office was closed. I learned today that your secretary took a half-day leave. Pero ang gusto ko talagang sabihin e: P.I. pagod na ako, hindi ako katulong dito. Hindi ako nagbayad ng malaking pera para gawing taga kuha ng mic taga tawag ng manong na magbubukas ng projector at most of all, taga kuha at bigay ng handouts! Hindi naman ako sinuswelduhan ng med para diyan. nagbayad ako para mag-aral at matuto. Trabaho ng secretary niyo iyan kaya wag niyo sisihin sa akin. Pakshet, pangit! Pagod na ako magpresident ng class. Bwisit. Hay. Sagot ni X in a really sarcastic tone: So ngayon kasalanan ng secretary? Aaaaaarrrggghhh right there and then gusto ko siya tisudin. Kainis!

Next stop, pedia sgd. Volunteer ako for leader ng case. Si doc parang nagmamadali masyado, In short siya na ang nagsasalita. In a regular day, ok naman siya, pero kanina mukha talaga akong tangang nakatayo sa harap. Taga tawag ng sasagot sa mga tanong niya na nakalista naman sa case mismo. Hay frustrating.

To add to that, hindi na natapos ang I told you so moment. Hello, marami na akong ganyan. I have friends who already pointed out na kasalanan ko and all. Must I get it from someone every single day? Hello, for all you know I felt bad na with what happened. I felt bad about myself. I actually felt stupid and it's not great being stupid. I obviously am affected when people point out how stupid I am in this situation. It's ok kung close kita, pero hello, kung mangaling sa hindi ko naman kaclose, like kanina, parang gusto ko siyang batukan. Leche, must I be reminded everyday of the mistake I made?!!!

I want to go in the middle of the field and really throw a bitch fit. Sinong gustong sumama?

Lessons Learned

2009-01-22T08:53:00.000-08:00

Sabi nga nila, you win some, you lose some. In the end, mga kaibigan mo pa din ang nandyan for you no matter what katangahan you do. Oo, babatukan ka, pero you know they have good intentions for doing so. Hay, next time I know na what to do.

What about Bebe?

2009-01-21T07:16:00.000-08:00

Well, I suppose everyone's jaw dropped (or was it just mine?) when they first saw Bebe Gandanghari on TV a few days ago. Never in my wildest dream did I imagine that this could happen in our country. I found it 1.) amusing 2.) weird. Amusing because it didn't cross my mind that after coming out on national tv, Rustom aka Bebe (or is it the other way around?) he would change his image and eventually change his screen name as well. Weird because, well, Bebe seems to have appeared out of nowhere, right in front of a tv camera, without a trace of his old self! Damn, 3 months of modelling in new York really paid off! Nashock lang siguro talaga ako.

What were your friends, officemates, colleagues reacion when they heard the news? Curious lang ako. Some classmates just laughed. Others, well, said na nanghinayang sila, guwapo pa naman siya. Yung iba naman felt like naawa sila kay Carmina. I asked them why. Kasi daw parang they've been intimate before, husband and wife pa nga (so I guess super duper intimate), tapos ngayon, mas maganda pa siya kay Carmina! Rumarampa pa ang lola mo!

In my mind, naisip ko, kung carry niya mag heels at dress, why not? :) Mukha naman siyang masaya e. hehe. I guess we all should be supportive of each other hehe. One less lonely people in the world and it's gonna be fine...

PS: Ang hirap maghanap ng new picture niya :)

Buffet!

2009-01-21T05:42:00.001-08:00

I've been tweeting with friends about restos in Binondo, when I suddenly remembered the Crossover Buffet at Dusit Thani Manila. I am a certified foodie. More than half of my baon ay nauubos ko sa pagkain. I love buffets too! I've tried Spirals, Circles, Heat, Nielsen's, Tong Yang and Triple V. Well, ganyan talaga kapag nasabihan ka nung bata ng "Ok lang ubusin ang pera sa pagkain... magtipid ka na sa mga bagay-bagay huwag lang sa pagkain". Hehe. Lola ko iyan, and I like to believe na siya ang may kasalanan kung bakit matakaw ako ngayon =)

Well di ko naman masisisi si lola noon. Patpatin kaya ako! Feeling ko nga pinagdadasal niya lagi na sana lumobo ako bigla para maging kasing cute ng mga tabachingching na intsik kids sa amin! Hahaha

Anyway, eto, nabalitaan ko nga ang Sunday Brunch Crossover Buffet ng Dusit. They have for resto, and for the amount of 1450 net, you could eat all you can, drink all you can na sa 4 na resto nila! They give you a band then let you choose your main resto kung saan ka magstay, then you can resto hop na! Among the 4 restos, popular yung Umu (Japanese resto; Remember the Gretchen Baretto credit card issue?). The buffet starts at 11:30 am and ends at 3 pm.

If you want to know more, just click the link below:

http://guides.clickthecity.com/metro/?p=4342

Heniway, makapagtipid na nga ng masubukan siya one of these days..Meron bang kasingtakaw ko na gusto siyang subukan? Hehehe Let's forget diet for a day!

2009-01-21T05:26:00.001-08:00

I'm addicted to Twitter! I have been adding people up like crazy. Kahit hindi ko kilala! Hahaha. It's just fun to get updates on people's lives. The innate usisero in me is at play haha. Right at this moment, my friends and I are abusing it like Twitter's the new YM. I know, I'm such a loser for discovering Twitter when it's already quite popular! Well, better late than never =)

Tweet Tweet!

Diet and Exercise

2009-01-21T04:32:00.000-08:00

Kailangan kong magdiet at exercise lalo since napilit ako ng kaklase ko sumali sa sayaw nila. Actually extra lang ako. Isa ako sa taga-buhat ng bamboo na papatungan niya sa sayaw. Concert siya ng isang org sa med so madaming manonood. Oks lang naman magbuhat ng bamboo. Kaso shirtless. Kinabahan pa ako nung una, baka kailangan nakabahag! Ayoko! Pero paano ka naman hihindi kung sinabi niyang susubukan nilang kunin yung crush ko para magpartner kaming magbuhat ng kawayan! Hahaha So, I said yes. Kasabay niyan ang thought na kailangan mabawasan pa ang taba ko sa tiyan in less than a month. Good luck talaga sa motivation! Hahaha

Blink Blink

2009-01-21T04:15:00.000-08:00

I was thinking of getting contact lenses earlier today. Wala lang, naisip ko kasi mas mura siya than getting a new pair of glasses. The problem is, hindi ko pa siya nasusubkuan ever. I've heard horror stories about contact lenses. Kahit sa ophtha class namin, profs would usually emphasize the hazards of contact wear use lalo na kapag eye diseases ang pinag-uusapan. Nevertheless, madami pa dn akong classmates na hindi bothered sa pinagsasabi nila.

I was picturing myself without glasses on, watching a movie, playing badminton, hanging out in a coffeeshop. I was liking the idea of not having anything perched on my nose while I'm doing those stuffs. Hassle free ba?

Well, I called up Cay when I was already at the optical shop. Since she has been using one since Pt days, I thought she could help me reach a decision on which type and brand to get. She was kinda apprehensive on me wearing contacts since wala daw sa personality ko. Naisip ko, binabagayan na pala ngayon ng personality ang contct lens?! I'm the type of person daw kasi na hindi mahilig sa hassle. E using contacts would require me to do a lot of preparations daw before wearing them. I have to constantly clean them, make sure they stay moist throughout the day. I have to remove them everytime I have to go to sleep. It's really not advisable daw to sleep with it (this I know from the lectures hehe) e antukin pa naman daw ako, matabi lang sa kama, tulog agad. Minsan kahit nakaupo sa klase nakakatulog ako. Mawalain pa daw ako ng gamit. sa liit ng contacts, baka mamissplace ko pa (hello, may lalagyan naman siya di ba? :) hehehe) So she asked me again, would you realy want to buy contacts?

I blinked. I ended up buying a new pair of glasses.

I Love You Phillip Morris

2009-01-20T08:26:00.000-08:00

Irritatingly Funny! I love Her!

2009-01-20T08:12:00.001-08:00

Friends

2009-01-20T07:42:00.000-08:00

I had a nice chat with Lance over coffee at Greenbelt earlier today. Nothing serious really, just catching up on each other's lives as well as dishing out on our ex's and how they've managed to take a hold of our lives in the past few months. Well I hope this time around, before the year of the ox starts, we'll be kissing goodbye to the year of the rat together with our ex's and move on. Really move on. No if's, no butts.

Anyway, here are some of our long-forgotten photos taken during the Rihanna-Chris Brown Concert. Sorry Lance, now ko lang na upload :)

It's my super kalbo days!

Marty (My PT friend), Me me me, Lance

Hazy! Humph! Labo pa rin ng kuha!

In my place

2009-01-20T07:22:00.000-08:00

I don't know if I'm ok or what. All I can here are the words " I love you, pero anong akala mo iiwan ko si BLANK for you?" reverberating in my mind. Shit. Kahit ilang apology hindi ko talaga mabura sa isipan ko yung mga words na iyan. I hate it. All I know is that I feel numb, which I think is better that feeling something.

A Certain Kind of Ache

2009-01-18T01:21:00.001-08:00

I'm feeling a certain kind of ache today. Exquisite if I may say. There's no one to blame of course except for myself. I wanted this and this is where it got me. In pain, and again, for the nth time, alone. It was great while it lasted. I hoped deep in my heart that this, whatever it is that you call..borrowed time perhaps, should never come to an end or if it does, it would end in my favor. But then, I'm left for someone, the same person, whose presence in my life, was but a mere side glance at a coffee shop a year ago. I could not complain that I haven't been warned about the consequences of my action. But I'm not one of those who could delay gratification better yet resist temptation. I needed the presence. I needed the hand I held for 10 months. I craved for the shoulder I rest my head on in the past. I needed the hugs, the affection, the conversations.

I'm too intelligent for this I know. I've had it all played out in my mind. I will, still, be the one he leaves behind when choices must be made. I just didn't want it to happen. I held on for too long, longer than expected. I could have made a graceful exit by leaving him in mid-air, but I didn't. I am not into that kind of ball game. I loved and I loved deeply, passionately and foolishly. I gave all that I had. Isn't it how it should be played?

It's not enough for me to know that I am the better person in terms of being a boyfriend because I was still the one left behind. In the end, he will always be an enigma. How he managed to win the one person I so loved, without much effort in his part. I have had a glimpse of his shortcomings. I was the one always available, always ready to fill the gap he could not fill. But still, he ends up winning.

Maybe, I was hanging on too long in a long decided battle. I was over competing, over staying when I could have fought other battles I could have won.

In the end, there's no one to blame except for myself. I wanted this. I wanted all of this.

Grr..

2009-01-17T09:49:00.000-08:00

I was kinda pissed off this morning. I was in the bathroom. I was preparing to shave, when suddenly, I couldn't find my razor! I just left it there near the sink. Grr. I looked for it everywhere, pero di ko pa rin mahanap. I asked manang if she transferred it somewhere. Hindi daw.

Another grr moment was when I found one of the bathroom thingie (kainis, arte hahaha), yung hose na pang poop-ass cleaner (I don't know what it's called hehehe), on the floor in two pieces. Parang nirip off yung head from the body. Nag-init talaga ang ulo ko. I can't think of a reason kung bakit kailangan siyang sirain. I have my hunches na kung sino gumawa: isa sa mga karpintero namin now. Kainis kainis.

Under renovation kasi yung 2nd-4th fl. so madaming karpintero dito. Sa 5th fl. kami nakatira now, walang cr doon since ginawa nila itong elevator area. So we had to go down to the 4th fl. everytime we had to go to the cr. Except for my lola siyempre; her room has a bathroom.

So ayon, I decided to keep my toiltries na sa room, bago mawala sila ng isa-isa. Grr talaga. Minsan, naiisip ko tuloy, kapag nagnakaw, logical reason, kailangan niya yung kinuha niya. Pero yung sirain ang isang bagay? Hello?!! Grr..

Still Single

2009-01-17T09:39:00.000-08:00

I'm still enjoying being single. Ewan. Last Friday, kahit na dapat uuwi na ako agad after Mega, sumama pa ako sa bahay nila K sa Lavista since nanroon ang mama niya. Papakilala daw niya ako. Magbibihis lang din siya kasi may family gathering silang pupuntahan. They'll just drop me off sa LRT on the way. I was in such pain that time (the giddy feeling wore off) that I didn't argue anymore. We were stuck sa C5 traffic, kaya I dozed off muna. When I woke up, nasa Katipunan na kami.

sa Lavista, while waiting for them to get ready, binigyan ako ng Advil. I took 2 tablets since wala ng effect sa headache ko ang 1 pain reliever lang. In no time, nawala na siya. I was ready to be interviewed.

I found his mom very elegant. Wala lang, first impression ko lang. She asked me the usual questions like where are you from, where do you live in Manila, what was your premed course. I in turn asked her about Vigan. K's siblings were also there taht time. Pinakilala din ako sa kanila. They are a charming bunch. I wish I could return the affection and warmth, pero I'm not there yet. I still love being free and unattached.

LTO, Tong Yang, Mac

2009-01-17T09:17:00.000-08:00

K asked me to accompany him sa LTO last Friday so he could renew his license. I was running a bit late since I went to the gym pa before that. By the time we met up, traffic near UST was horrendous. Add mo pa yung series of unfortunate events na nangyari, we ended up in Makati instead of Megamall. Since walang LTO doon, pumunta pa kami talaga ng Mega. We arrived there around 3 pm na. I haven't had breakfast and lunch that time (post exam then gym kaya ganoon). I was hungry. Pumila muna si K while I withdraw and have his ID photocopied. In fairness, ang haba ng pila sa atm. Parang 30 minutes ako naghintay. Buti na lang mabilis lang ang xerox.

Before I went back to the LTO, I bought a drink muna. Soya milk lang ang pinakamalapit doon so iyon na lang pinatos ko. Ok lang, paborito ko naman soy milk, di nga lang nakakabusog.

When I was at the LTO, tinamaan ako ng migraine. Ewan kung sa halung puyat, gutom and pagod iyon, basta ang sakit niya. So since naghihintay pa si K, I sat on the corner and took a nap. It wasn't helpful. People were constantly being called sa P. A. system so maya-maya nagigising ako. I think that worsened my headache. K was joking na kaya daw siya pumunta sa mall branch kasi sabi sa net 30 minutes lang daw makukuha mo na ang license, e hindi naman pala, airconditioned lang. Asa pa siya, hello? 3rd world kaya tayo, pang 3rd world din ang bilis. Pasalamat na lang tayo na nag-iimprove ang pagka-3rd world natin at medyo bumibilis na ang process. Now you could could your license the same day!

Anyway, naghintay kami ng 2 hours for his license. Afterwards, sure ako, convinced, gutom na gutom na ako. Naglakad-lakad kami looking for a place to eat. Nadaanan namin ang Tong Yang. Wala ng isip-isip. Doon na kami kumain.

I haven't been to Tong yang for liek years na. Bata pa ata kami last time na kumain kami sa Quezon City branch. Buhay pa lolo ko non. Pagspecial occassion, favorite namin iyon puntahan. Chinese kasi hahaha. So ayon, as in kumuha kami ng napakaraming pagkain. Siyempre niluto pa namin muna. Yung beef and lamb nila ang paborito namin. In the end, busog na kami, marami pa ding hindi naluluto. Egad! May sign na nakasulat: Leftovers Additional 500 pesos! Shucks! Panic mode! E busog na talaga kami. What I did was, I got some tissue paper, spread it sa table then, when no one's watching, I wrapped the food with it and stuffed it in my pants. Yeah, we were that desperate not to pay the fine. Wala na akong pakialam that time kung madaming nagugutom at hindi nakakakain, basta ayokong mamultahan ng 500 pesos!

I rushed to teh comfort room and threw the rolled-up tissue sa trash can. Success! Buti na lang the fish didn't stink (puro isda yung di namin naubos lutuin). Heniway, we paid the bill, then scampered off like kids. I don't want to do that again! Hahaha Kinonsensya ako afterwards pero it didn't last long, I was happy I didn't pay the extra hehehe.

We then headed to the Mac store before heading home. I was browsing for mac cases. I'm glad they had new ones na. I didn't bought one dati kasi feeling ko immune siya sa mga gasgas and all since bakal siya. Guess not. To prevent further gasgas, I decided to buy a blue plastic case. Sinamahan ko na din ng cable for the projector connection as well as a spliiter for the ipod.

I was giddy all over walking out of the store. Kahit na I still have that migraine, I was all smiles. i have new things hehehe. Pero that thought didn't last long din. I realized na since I spent a lot that day, I had to make tipid na for the coming weeks kung hindi sangkatutak na sermon na naman aabutin ko kay mama.

Hay, if only the headache disappeared that time, I would have been in 7th heaven that very moment :)

Friday Tamaritis

2009-01-17T08:29:00.000-08:00

I woke up quite late last Friday. Considering I have an exam at 8 am, waking up at 7:20 is sure to bring my adrenaline 2 notches higher, but then it didn't. The last day of exam for the week, and I woke up tired before I even stretched a muscle. Maybe it's the caffeine, that I've been chugging continuously for the past couple of days, seeping the bejesus out of me. I don't know. I was dead tired that morning, all I wanted to do was to lay in bed and sleep..and probably curse medicine. I knew I was going to be late at that very moment. I thought, I haven't even finish studying for the exam. Shit. Exam for that day was for Internal Medicine Pulmo-Endocrine combo. I was only able to read 2/3's of the topic for pulmo, none for endo. And I haven't even scanned the past exams yet. Most of my classmates said that the endo questionnaire is based on previous test questions. Shit shit shit. I'm starting to hate this day.

I went around my morning routine just like it was a regular day. Usually when I'm late, or almost late, I skip the waterheater part and just jump right into the freakingly cold shower. But since I'm in the mood to take my time around the house, I waited 5 more minutes just so the water could warm up a bit so I could take a bath while sleeping at the same time. Yes, I do that. I take a bath in the morning with my eyes closed. I'm addicted to it. I know where the soap and shampoo is. I know where to lather and where to scrub. I'm like sleepwalking in the shower during the mornings hahaha. Anyway, so imagine me late..not just late for a class but for an exam, and I'm dilly-dallying at home. I know, ang sarap kong batukan hahaha.

By the time I was done, it is already 30 minutes past 8. Then a thought struck my mind, what if samplex exam nga ang test and people were already finish by the time I get there, I wouldn't be allowed to take the prelims! I have to wait for the remedials to take it. Usually they give it in essay form!! Waaaahhhhh! That thought woke me up with a jolt. I was suddenly in a hurry to get to class. I was basically running through the corridors, sweeping the hallway with fury only I can understand. Shit ayoko mag-essay exam!

When I arrived in class, the professor was already signing permits. Oh shit, that means, I have only like an hour to take the test. Good thing no one got out of the rooms yet so I was able to take the exam.

The test was 100 items, 90 questions of which are in multiple choice format while the remaining 10 points were true or false statements. I scanned through the questions, answering the ones I know along the way. My first impression was that it was hard. Not the type of no-brainer exam questions. I had to analyze, analyze and analyze. My neurons are either having suicide at that very moment or scampering for shelter. They don't want to be used! I felt an impending mental block happening. Good thing, I was able to get a hold of myself and focus on the questions. Sa mga hindi ko alam, I made guesses. Hopefully logical guesses. Hay.

When people started passing their papers, I thought, "Nadalian ba sila, bakit nagsusubmit na sila?". I was pressured. I hate the feeling of being the last one left taking the exam. I hurriedly answered the last few questions and submitted my paper.

Outside I saw my friends discussing their answers. I heard them say na samplex nga ang questions. Nagpanic mode ulit ako. I had a hard time answering the damn exam. Inisip ko na lang na if I pass this one, it just means na I really learned something during those past 2 months and not just from memorizing the samplex. Sweet lemoning hehehe. Deep inside I was bothered. Why didn't I study the sample exam na lang? Why did I have to be so stubborn and still read the awfully long chapters in the book and not even finish? I didn't have the answer to that. Maybe feeling bibbo lang ako that night. Ewan.

At a lost, I decided to go home and change for the gym. I had to run, run, run to clear my mind. I had to relax and detoxify.

Made a mental note to myself: No studying at home during the final stretch of the exams and definitely, READ SAMPLEX!!!!

Dystocia, Breech and Placenta Previa

2009-01-12T23:43:00.000-08:00

Isama mo pa ang abortion sa topic. Lecher. Ang haba ng coverage ng Ob exams for tomorrow. And yes, I'm whining instead of studying. I'm here at RP Starbucks. Kanina pa ako nandito, at from the topics I listed 2 pa lang ang naaaral ko. Breech, I read last night, pero walang retention since antok na antok ako. I didn't plan to study last night since gusto ko bumawi ng tulog, pero K was making kulit on me. Di daw siya makaaral kung wala ako, so ayun, sumama ako sa kanya sa Tomas, of course kasama barkada niya. May I just make a commercial? hehe. Last night, yung crush ko from our batch, yung model-modelan, was also there studying. Kasama niya friend ko. I said hi to both of them. Siyempre mas confident yung 'hi' kay friend, tapos mas mahinang 'hi' yung kay crush. May hiya effect hahaha. Super serious siya mag-aral last night. Hay, ang cute niya talaga. Hehehe. Tama nga si Tinie, crushes are a blessing. They brighten your day just by existing hahaha. Anyway, maaga sila umuwi ni friend last night. Kala ko dedeadmahin ako. Kaso nung paalis na sila biglang lumingon siya sa akin, tapos sabi niya, " Eugene, Good luck sa exam, bye". That caught me off guard. I just muttered a feeble " Good luck din tom sa exam . . ., bye". Ano pa ba, siyempre, kinilig ako. Wahaha. Nung umalis sila, naantok ulit ako.

Anyway, C is here sa RP with co-resident niya, doing their paper. I brought him pasta that I was planning to claim na niluto ko, but decided not to, kasi baka kapag nagpaluto siya sa akin e hindi ko magaya hahaha. PS: Cute siya sa suot niya today haha. Hay, thank God for free wifi at may legitimate break ako in between my readings. Nitatamad na talaga ako. Hay vajajay. I have to love them today or else baka ibagsak ko siya tom. Vajayjay, babies and placenta. Time to study na.

Rockwell Saturday

2009-01-12T23:00:00.001-08:00

I was at Rockwell last Saturday with Joel and his friends.. and their friends hehe. I was suppose to have coffee with him since di ko pa siya nakikita since he came back from Bohol. La lang, just to hang out and make kwento (haha arte effect). When I texted him about the idea, he told me that he's going to meet up with friends Saturday for coffee and dinner, why not join them na lang. E wala naman ako other plans for that day, sabi ko game ako! The more the manyier! Hahaha

Fast forward to Saturday. I was late. Usapan was 3 pm. I arrived around 3:30 na. As usual na una si Joel doon. I was late kasi nakatulog ako..while having a massage. Dapat mag gygym ako, kaso ang sakit ng katawan ko dahil inabuso ko ang gym the previous day, ayon, instead of the gym, I decided to have a massage na lang. I arrived there around 1 pm. E since 1 hour lang naman ang massage, confident ako na hindi ako malalate this time. Ayon, nakatulog ako sa massage. Haha. Nakaalis ako sa Tomas ng mga 3 na. Good thing may MRT. If I took a cab, inabot na siguro ako ng siyan-siyam.

Anyway, ayon, I was at Rockwell around 3:30. Since hindi pa ako naglunch that time, at gusto din magmeryenda ni Joel before meeting up with his friends, we went to Kenny Rogers. First time ko kumain sa Kenny ng Rockwell. Iba ang set-up. Parang resto na talaga siya at hindi fastfood. We sat down and the waiter took our orders instead of the usual set-up wherein youy have to line up and order at the counter. Napansin ko lang na medyo pahealthy ang menu nila doon. The usual roasted chicken meal, instead of rice and choice of side dish ang kasama, naging mashed potato and steamed vegetables. Hmm.. I predicted na hindi ako mabubusog, pero iyon pa din ang inorder ko hehe.

Heniwey, after we ate, we headed to Starbucks in search of his friends. Unang pinuntahan namin, Starbucks near Cibo. Wala. Next Starbucks sa may UCC. Wala pa din, pero I saw some classmates studying in advance for the prelims. If I know, nagpapanggap lang sila hahaha. Next stop was Pancake House. Nandoon pala sila. There were 3 of them there. Si Beau (ganito pala spelling non hahaha c/o Philippe's blog) which I met previously sa party nila Joel. Finally I was also able to meet Philippe, who is my Multiply friend. I like looking at his photos kasi ang galing niya kumuha ng pictures. Mga frustration ko na naman hehe. Siyempre kasama niya ang kanyang Hani. Hang-out lang kami doon. Making kuwento. Then 2 more people came, Jard and Ryan. Chat ulit. Actually, more of sila ang nag-uusap since they know each other na. Hiya mode pa ako. And well, hmm, di ako makarelate kasi more of their field ang pinag-uusapan nila. Pero fun pa din, kasi they have this great sense of humor. Wink wink.

Later on, we decided to prowl Rockwell. Joel's looking for gifts, I was just happy to be out of the house and meeting new people. After a few minutes of walking and shopping, everyone decided to have dinner. Cibo was the scene of the crime. Since hindi ako nabusog sa kinain ko earlier, I ordered pasta, then shared pizza with Joel and Beau. Kuwento again. Then it's back to the mall for us. I was able to buy a book sa Fully Booked. Good luck na lang kung mabasa ko siya with all the reading materials I have to read this week. Haha.

After shopping, it's Starbucks time! Other friends of Philippe were there. There was Eric (whom we met earlier at Fully Booked), Nel, Joey, Lia, and Daniel. They were very, very makulit. Joey's group was there to look for a prom attire for Daniel. They later on watched The Spirit. I on the other hand, went with Joel after everyone left. Philippe was sick (kaya siguro not as animated as he's blog hehe). We met up with Jamie then later on Dats. We stayed at Starbucks outside Rockwell. Kuwento lang. I had to leave a few minutes after Dats came.

Iyan ang blow by blow account ng Saturday ko with Joel and my new found friends :) It was fun hanging out with them. Looking forward to the next one. :)

Now I'm back to reading about child birth and vajajay's.

First Day High

2009-01-12T00:02:00.000-08:00

First day of exams, and I'm sleepy as hell. Nakakatamad kasi aralin ang first exams for the week which is Med Ethics. nadamay lang ang ENT. I had a loong weekend pero sa tatlong araw na iyon parang ilang bese ko lang nabuklat ang ENT book ko. I tried, really, but the idea of hanging out with friends si sooo inviting that I just had to give in. Ayon, last night lang ako nag-aral.

So kamusta ang first day of exam? I arrived late. As in pagdating ko for med ethics, tapos na magbigay ng exam. I immediately got a questionnaire from doctora and started answering. I was finish in no time. Late dumating, una natapos. Hindi naman sa I found it easy, pero medyo may pagkasubjective siya kasi may essay about situations tapos you have to satisfy the questions being asked. I answered them briefly. Hindi ko na nilagyan ng kung ano-ano pang palabok na words para humaba. Wish ko lang after macheck ni doctora, e pasado naman ako.

Second exam was ENT. I used the 2 hours before the exam to study, read as much as I can and try to answer the sample questions. People were saying that ENT exams are based on samplex or sample exams. So medyo confident ako. Surprise surprise! Hindi siya samplex! Arrrggghh talagang I had to pick my brains just to answer the questions. Buti na lang at nakinig ako ng mga lectures ni doc. It pays talaga kung crush mo ang prof hehehe Anyway, when I checked the answer key, I found out na did ok. 15 mistakes. Pwede na. Hay. Walang pasok bukas! Sarap! Chill lang, pero the nerd in me is kicking in. I don't want to waste the momentum. I'd probably study later for the next exam.

Fight Fight Fight!

Freaking Cold

2009-01-02T04:51:00.000-08:00

I spent the afternoon at Starbucks Luisita trying to be nerdy by pouring over my ophthalmology book like crazy. Yes, like crazy! Bakit? Well, kasi wala naman kaming exams sa ophtha pero iyon ang binabasa ko. Ewan, pero I feel like I need to study/read ophtha since isa siya sa mga subjects na di ko binubuklat masyado ang libro. More of handouts. E next, next week na ang exams, and usually books galing ang question.

Anyway, some subjects that I should be focusing for the coming week ay ENT, Medicine and Prevmed. ENT case submission sa Monday and quiz sa Wednesday. Same goes with Prevmed. Medicine naman sa Tuesday. Pedia pala sa Friday meron din.

Back to Starbucks. Ayon, I was studying ophtha nga while sipping on my Venti Iced Non-fat Mocha (ahehehe non-fat nga venti naman hehehe). E ang lamig sa loob ng Starbucks. As in. Venti Iced Drink + Cold Temperature = Nginig. At wala akong dalang jacket. Aha! Naisip kong mag-5 minute break! Lalabas ako!

Paglabas ko, napamura ako (deep inside lang naman). P.I. Ang lamig!!!! Shieeeetttt. Malamig sa loob ng Starbucks + Malamig sa labas ng Starbucks = Saan pa ako pupunta? Aha, sa loob ng supermarket! Since may pinapabili na din mama ko so might as well use my break to buy it. F*#king Sh*t! mas malamig pa sa supermarket!

Solution? Wala na akong maisip. Pumunta na lang ako sa Chowking at nag-order ng Spicy Beef Wanton Mami. Effective? Medyo. Paglabas ko, same draft. Ayun, nangisay pa din ako. Ack. Iba na talaga ang weather ngayon. But then I like it more than the extreme heat tuwing summer!

2009

2009-01-01T04:18:00.000-08:00

Things to do in 2009:

1. Lose the unwanted pounds gained during the holiday season. That means watching my food intake, do regular sit-ups and push-ups and hit the gym in most days of the week.

2. In line with the first one, work on those abs. In 2008, I bought lots of magazines and books on how to achieve the elusive 6-pack.

3. Study harder. I admit that I haven't been that studious this past year. Kahit na sabihin pa ng mga friends ko na masipag ako mag-aral, I know I can do more. I did it when I was in pre-med, I can do it now. So med, here I come.

4. Live a drama free life. Really. Practice the Secret :) Begin with the love life then the family hahahaha

5. Learn the art of hanging out with my relatives especially the men. I grew up in a houselhold of mostly women so being in the company of men, especially male relatives is quite hard for me. I often had a hard time being around them since hindi ako marunong magreact/kumilos. Iba kasi kapag relatives ko, medyo malalakas ang personality so I get intimidated with them. So part of my 2009 list is to be close and comfortable with my male relatives.

Eto pa lang ang naiisip ko now. Might add some stuffs to it in the coming days :)

2008

2009-01-01T00:31:00.000-08:00

Things that mattered in 2008:

1. Japan, Hong Kong, Malaysia, Singapore. It was a great opportunity to explore these countries. It would not have been possible if not for my lolo Jake and UST PT Family (Japan), Hong Kong (Mom and Lola), Malaysia and Singapore (Tinie and Derrick). Sana maulit muli.

2. Gym. I've never been tempted to go to the gym until middle of this year. Although my primary goal that time was not to be healthy and lose those unwanted pounds, I slowly got the hang of it and sorely miss it when I don't get to visit and pump iron One of the precious discoveries I had. I'm hooked. Here's to building a healthier and more attractive me. hehehe.

3. Virgin Labfest. Thank you Cay for joining me in this crazy one-week adventure. Virgin labfest is truly a remarkable event and I'm glad I was able to witness it with you this year. Hopefully we still get to watch it during clarkship (looking forward o hehehe).

4. Cinemalaya. 100, Namets and Andoy were my favorites this year. I got to watch some of them with my fellowe classmates. Like Virgin Labfest, I'm looking forward to this year's entries. I'm sure as hell they'll be awesome.

5. Blogspot. I haven't thought I could write and still make sense until friends introduced me to this wonderful community. I still can't write like most of the Gods of blogging, but being able to share myself and my thoughts is enough for me to continue posting senseless things (this is me being conceited or just plain humble). I also made a lot of friends through this blog. Shoutouts to some of them: Mcvie, Joaqui, Ian, LFTS, Chyng, Carlo, Joey, Pao, Lance, Emon and Tristan. Madami pa pero eto yung mga naaalala ko. Peace :)

6. Medicine. It was a rollercoaster ride for my family. I'm glad I can still continue taking up Medicine. I hope I could reach graduation and later on pick a residency. Thanks so much to my Lolo Jake and Uncle Jojo for all the help. I'm eternally grateful.

7. Family. It was a tumultuous time for my family what with the thing that happened to my mom and all those crazy bsiness stuffs. I'm glad we're still together. We survived 2008! Yahoo. Honestly, there were times when I wish I was born in a different family (guilty, tsk tsk tsk), but then this year happened. It made me value each one of you more. We are dysfunctionally functioning and and I love you especially my mom for being always a fighter :)

8. Carlo. C happened. As well as T. As much as this blog's first entries were about you and how you both hurt me, I learned from it and I'm continuously learning from it. It was a difficult situation to be in but it forced me to think and rethink abut what I know and what I believe in. I wasn't as strong or composed during those times, but I guess I did my best given my capabilities. C, you will always be special to me like J, D and (another) J.

9. Friends. Thanks you for not giving up on me when I gave up on myself. It was as I've said a very tiring, traumatic and nerve wracking year for me. Thank you for helping me pick-up the pieces. I wouldn't have known what to do without you guys. Belmar, Cay and Tinie, special mention to my girlfriends who tirelessly listen to my dramas and heartaches and for making me feel special when I felt so low and ordinary. Same goes to Mcvie who listened and gave sound advise on my love and life. I wished I've known you earlier, maybe I would've been wiser in certain aspects of my growing up hehe. Classmates, section 3C. It was great belonging to a class so determined, loving and respectful. Here's to 2010. Hopefully will be doctors by then. I love you guys. Lance for being heartbroken as well. hahaha. It just proves na hindi lang ako ang nakakaramdam ng katopakan this year :) Peace, I hope you've mended yours already. I know you've decided to be a slut, but I'm sure, sabi nga ni Anne, you're the best slut in town. i heart you friend. Ian, for sharing with me you overseas life. I miss the conversations and the stories. I hope you're doing well there. Looking forward to your blog entries and photos.

10. K. For sharing with me who you are. You are wonderful. Here's to getting to know you more. Cheers.

Happy New Year

Single. Taken. Taken for Granted.

2009-01-01T00:00:00.000-08:00

Three roles. I need to choose one. I can't play all of them this 2009.

Single

I never thought being single could be fun until I'm hitched or sort of hitched. Well, I realizedI love having me-time. You know, the time when you get to be on your own, you don't have to text anyone to tell them where you are, what you're doing and who you're with. I can go to the gym everyday. I can go to the mall and just stay inside the bookstore. I can talk to people, meet up with them and just hang out without anyone's approval. I have never been single for a loooonnngg time until now. I started out craving to be in a relationship asap. I miss this, I miss that. Turns out, I enjoyed being single. I enjoyed being me. No commitment. No responsibilities. No heartaches/headaches.

Taken

I've always been taken. I've been to 5 serious relationships and some M.U.'s along the way. I think I was a good partner, if not great (nagbubuhat ng sariling banko hahaha) during those times. Of course there were the occasional shortcomings in my part, but then who doesn't? Anyway, being in a relationship is also a great thing. Companionship, the fun of doing things together. The 'couple things'. There are things in this world that were made to be done by two individuals (or more, however you want to play the field) like well making love, kissing, holding hands, and other modified 'couple things' like watching movies, having dinners. I love all of those.

I'm almost taken. Still prolonging that phase where you are called a 'couple'. What's keeping me one foot off the ground? Well, I am overthinking, over analyzing things and basically just undecided. K is a great person. You don't know how lucky you are until you meet someone like K. I guess I still needed time, like this break to weigh things over.

Taken for Granted

How do I explain this. It's still C and how we're friends with benefits. Highlight the word friends then underline with benefits. Yup, I guess that is how he calls what we have. And I'm not bothered by the 'with benefits' part. It is the 'friends' thing that I really don't understand. Or maybe I do but I just don't want to acknowledge it. It simply means that we would just be this and not that. With that I meant happily ever after with all those sunshiny thoughts and head in the clouds dreams. It is great actually to still be talking to C. C wants to fly into the horizon, while I'm already contented with settling down (or do I? hmm complicated).

I guess it's the new year. Decisions should be made. I hope I make the right one. Something that I wouldn't lose sleep on. Single and free. Happily taken. Foolishly taken for granted.

The New Year Recipes

2008-12-27T06:11:00.000-08:00

We don't celebrate Christmas. New year too. We just do our own thing at home. I usually surf the net or watch a movie on cable while munching on some pizza or chips coupled with iced cold cola. My two sisters either attend Christmas parties with my mom or sleep early. This has been the routine for as long as I can remember. Of course there will be the occasional family reunion falling on Christmas or New Year's Eve. During those times we would be celebrating the events at relative's place or somewhere fancy.

This year though, parang sinisipag ako. Inspiration? Too much tv. Yup. Since I don't have the luxury of watching tv sa Manila, tv galore ako dito sa province. Favorite show? Discovery Travel and Adventure and The Lifestyle Channel.

One afternoon, I came across Nigela's Christmas Special. She prepared roasted turkey with stuffing and some other crazy but sure as hell, deliciously sinful dishes. Habang pinapanood ko siya, parang nalalasahan ko na yung luto niya. As in takam na takam ako. In short, tulo-laway. I like her show because unlike the others, she's not that into the healthy cooking thing. I mean, she's very generous when she uses ingredients. Basta luto lang ng luto.

Anyway, so I kinda liked her recipe for the turkey (ang dali lang kasi hehe, feeling ko magmumukha pa akong pro in the eyes of my mom kapag naperfect ko ang turkey dish ahahaha) that day so I jotted it down. I told my mom na ako magluluto sa New Year. May turkey naman kaming alaga. E di katayin ng driver then ako magluluto. Siya talaga dapat kumatay non kasi ayokong kumakatay ng manok or bibe or turkey. As in. Naexperience ko na, at tama na iyon. Ayoko ng ulit-ulitin pa.

Hmm, back to my preparations for New Year's Eve. I'm thinking of doing pasta with two sauces. I mean isang regular spaghetti sauce tapos isang imbento ko using olive oil. I mean, sold out naman sa friends ko ang mga pinagiimbento naming pasta sauce ni manang nung pasukan, baka maghit naman sa mama at sis ko. Hehe. I was thinking of using crabmeat, baby shrimps, scallops and crab fat sa olive oil based sauce. Di kasi mahilig sa ganoon mama ko. I mean olive oil based sauce so naisip ko, may spaghetti sauce tapos may olive oil based sauce para happy lahat just in case. Hehehe

Now for the third dish, since we're going to Baguio tom, naisip ko great opportunity na ito to buy some vegetables there tapos magpaturo sa tito ko on a greta way to prepare steak of lamb. Since may resto siya doon, might as well take advantage of his culinary skills.

Why steak? Why not. E parang elementary pa ata ako nung last na nagcelebrate kami ng Christmas and New Year na kami ang nagluto. I mean, nung buhay pa ang dad at lolo ko, the women in our family/house (which means lahat except me, my dad and my lolo) would really prepare dishes. Parang pangdrama movie, after nila mamatay (which is magkasunod), parang nawala ang spice ng mga lola, tita at mama ko sa pagcelebrate. Ayon, deadma na sila. Parang Merry Christmas Happy New Year period. Ok lang naman, kasi di naman din ako mahilig magparty and all. Pero this year, la lang, para maiba naman. Sinisipag ako. Kaya charan..Magluluto talaga ako.

Anyway, got to prepare for tomorrow's trip na. Wish me luck on my cooking endeavor. Madami pa namang araw to back-out or madisheartan or simply tamarin hahaha.

Christmas at UST

2008-12-26T08:07:00.000-08:00

The UST Christmas Tree

Underneath the tree
Snowflakes

My Christmas Story

2008-12-26T05:32:00.000-08:00

Christmas Day. Lingayen. Family reunion at my tita's beach house. Peaceful.

Dried grass in a sea of gray sand

The pilgrimage begins

Follow the leader
The watchmen
Afraid of the watersFriendly with the sand

Some things left by those who came before us

3 kids swam then drowned
Then we were left to think
Was December 25 a good day to die?
The beginning is the end as well

Lechon

2008-12-25T06:33:00.000-08:00

Lechon Lechon Lechon.

The crispy, golden brown skin.

The tender, juicy, tasty meat.

I just love Lechon!

Lately, I've been having my serving of lechon at least once a week. Thanks to Salcedo(Saturdays) and Legaspi (Sundays) Market. What's more, every family gathering ata this Chrsitmas season e may lechon. Sobrang hirap magpigil lalo na kung masarap ang sarsa. Hehehe. Di ba kapag may ulam dapat may kanin. So for example, may lechon sa table, may masarap pa na sarsa, parang kulang kung walang kanin na kasabay. Paano kung after kumain ng lahat, may lechon pa. As in, crispy golden brown lechon skin. Siyet, napapa round 2, 3 and 4 pa ako sa pagkain. Samahan mo pa ng ice cold Coca-Cola (parang commercial na ito ha!). Waaaahhhh! I'm sure, by the end of the year, nag gain na ako ng ilang pounds! Hahaha.

Tagaytay

2008-12-23T09:48:00.000-08:00

Went to Tagaytay recently. Most memorable trip. Enjoyed it so much, especially Antonio's. Here are some pictures from the swankiest restaurant down south.

Stairway leading to the dining area

Waiting to be seated. We didn't have reservations that's why we were asked to wait for a table. In fairness 45 minutes kami naghintay! Sulit naman. Had an enjoyable lunch :)

Obvious ba? I'm making pacute :)

Old school chair; Notice the tiles on the floor, Nice :)

Geeky smile while waiting for the food

Simple table ornaments

Nice chandeliers

Appetizer: Mushrooms in Balsamic Vinegar

K's meal: Lamb Cutlets

Mine was Grilled Garoupa, Prawns and Scallops

Picture picture

Something New

2008-12-23T08:59:00.000-08:00

Arrived here sa Tarlac a few hours ago. I can't sleep pa. Maybe it's because of the coffee I took when we had our stopover sa Nlex Shell Station. Anyway, I've been quite busy the past few days, jumping form one Christmas Party to the next. I attended C1, C3 and C6's individual Christmas Party as well our class' major party held at Mic's beautiful place (Thanks Mic for hosting the event). I was also able to go to the Fabcaster's party, also had dinner with Joel, last but not the least, I was able to spend time with K. I wasn't able to attend to other events that were part of my schedule, namely: Christmas dinner with PT barkada (was at Tagaytay that time) as well as the Kythe Christmas Party by FilChimsa (overslept). Anyway, here are some pics from the C1, C3, C6, and Section C Party.

C1 Christmas Party at Buongiorno Tagaytay

C1 Group Shot! Those bottles we were holding were courtesy of Kriselle. Welch's Sparkling Grape Juice Fizz. Each person get's one!

Cay, Tetris, Euge, Noreen, Ehm

Standing (from L-R) Paula, Tetris. Seated (from L-R) Nina, Shar, Euge.

Standing (from L-R) Lawrence, Paula, Tetris. Seated (from L-R) Nina, Shar, Euge.

Standing (from L-R) Laur, Noreen, Sha, Pats, Euge, Tetris, Lady. Seated from (L-R) Justine, Paula.

Candid Shot

Entire C1 minus Dave (who went with C4) + Reina and Sha

F4 Members of C1

Section C Christmas Party

Mic's Place. Lagare itong araw na ito for me. Attended two class party, notice the purple long sleeves. Hahaha. Over exposed.

Sober Club. The yummy drinks made everyone feel yummy deep inside hahaha

From L-R: Bev, Lovely, Maan, Faye, Euge, Kai

Sandwiched by 2 James M: James M(abilangan), Euge, James M(alala)

I'm soooo red!

C6 Seaside Christmas Party

Subsection C6 at Dampa, Diosdado Macapagal Branch

Mga gutom na guys (from L-R) Jett, Rei, Jerry, Ken, Euge

Groupshot of C6 Guys + Me

Ken, Euge

C6 Gals

I don't know what I'm doing here. I was asking them ata to compress for a picture

Laging pareho ang hairstyle namin sa class. Halos pareho din ng glasses. Kaya lagi kaming napagkakamalan (me as jett, jett as me) ng mga myopic profs hehe

This is me, busog, smiling from ear to ear!

C3 Christmas Party

C3 party held at Lovely's place.

Standing (from L-R) Euge, Mau, Dim, Mimay, Lovely, Jas
Seated (from L-R) Faye, JC, Saki, Sarie, Ken

Tuwad

2008-12-15T02:52:00.001-08:00

Earlier today, I had my brush with pediatrics practicals. We had an oral exam wherein we were asked to pick 3 numbers, which corresponds to physical exam procedures, from a bowl, given 2.5 minutes to do those procedures to an unknown kid in front of a pediatrician. Nakakangarag siya!

What were the numbers I picked?

19 Do na nasal inspection

41 Position the patient for a rectal exam

21 Do a throat inspection

Mental block moment! I don't know how to position a kid for a rectal exam! What kind of inspection should I do in a nasal inspection? I proceeded to do a throat thingie first.

I gave the usual instructions to the kid, inserted the tongue depressor in her mouth and proceeded to verbalize what I was seeing. I had to say it in a hurried but clear manner para naman marinig ni doctora and she could give me the appropriate grade.

After acing the throat inspection I was torn between choosing which procedure to do next. I'm still stuck in my mental block moment. Position the patient for a rectal exam. How hard could it be? Isn't it the same for adult and kids? I asked the kid, using the vernacular to come nearer and imitate my position. Yes, I told her: Iha, halika dito, gayahin mo ako. I shamelessly placed both of my hands on top of the table and assumed the 'tuwad' position while the child, flashing her most innocent face, imitated me. Doctora was laughing and I knew I got it all wrong. She then asked me: How do you position the patient for a rectal exam if she is in a lying down position. It was suppose to be a cue, but I didn't get it. Time was running out. I answered: I really don't know. Sidelying perhaps? I should have said it in a more confident manner since it was the right answer (I found out from my friends after the exam..after they laughed at my story). She then asked me to hurriedly do the nasal exam.

I was really lost. I took a sachet of coffee and proceeded to do an olfactory exam. I asked the kid to close her eyes, covered one of her nostrils when doctora interjected: nasal inspection not an olfactory nerve exam. Shit. Oo nga. I fumbled. everything seemed to be happening in slow motion. I picked up my otoscope and inserted it into the kid's left nostril. Not hyperemic, no obstruction..Buuuuzzzzzzzz. Times up. The next examiner entered the room. I heard dra. blurt out: ok pero kulang. I know, I failed to say that there were no foreign objects, no puss..yad yada yada.

I immediately gathered my things and headed towards the exit where I was greeted with the silly grins of my classmates who finished the exam ahead of me. Yeah, we shared and laughed at each other's boo boos. At the end of the day, I emerged victorious. I had the most shameful boo boo this time. Hehe. I just laughed it off. May exam pa bukas.

The Wish List

2008-12-13T16:22:00.000-08:00

Everyone's doing a wish list so I decided to join the bandwagon and make one for myself (or for others who wish to give me a present hehehe)

1. Glasses. I broke mine again. I bought this Replay glasses a year ago. It looked really nice on display at one of those stores in Trinoma. This is the first time I bought an expensive pair of glasses. I remember being giddy that time. Well, the giddy feeling didn't last that long. After a few weeks, the paint (do we still call it paint?) started to chip off. Really, like in walls of old houses. So I started scraping everything off so that it would have a uniform appearance. The thing is, the paint on the other parts wouldn't budge, so there, mukha siyang tagpi-tagpi. After a few months, I decided to buy a new pair. Uso ang square-type glasses that time, so that's what I got. I wore it everyday until the time I suddenly had a reaction with the metallic frame. Yup, contact dermatitis. Nasty. Itchy blisters at the back of my ears. Siyempre, nung gumaling siya I tried to use it ulit. Same reaction. So I took out my old replay from it's hiding place and started using it again. The thing is, nakatulog ako while studying and nadaganan ko ata siya! Ayan, twisted na yung frame. kahit si K nabobother about it. Kinukulit ako bumili. It still works for me naman e, pero awkward nga when I wear it around people. Their attention seem to focus on my glasses. So iyon, part of my wish list is a new pair of glasses.

2. Belt. Since I lost weight, I have been having problems with my uniform and pants. Sobra na silang maluwag. Siyempre, I have a belt, pero, hindi na siya enough to hold my jeans/pants in place. So one of the things I placed on our subsection's wishlist is a new belt.
3. Hand Cream. I have dry hands. Kung gaano ka oily ang face ko, ganoon naman ka dry ang hands ko. I get cuts easily so I usually bring with me a tube of hand cream/lotion. E trigger happy ako. Ang sarap ng feeling ng well lubricated hands. Ayon, hindi tumatagal ang isang tube sa akin. I want a year's supply! hehehe The Face Shop's hand cream have nice smell that's why I like them. Same goes to Mark and Spencer's.

4. North Face Backpack. Yup, I want one of those with prints on them. Pwede din yung Jansport bags. White or with print. I like backpacks because I could stuff them full withthings na I know hindi ko naman magagamit. I mean, I'm one of those people who likes to bring a lot wherever they go, just in case they'll need them. Most of the time, like mga books, notes, di ko naman nababasa kahit dala-dala ko.
5. A copy of Ricci Chan's song The Hardest Part from the movie 100. I saw the film thrice and I always get this bittersweet feeling at the end of the movie because of the song.
6. Mini Display Port to DVI Adapter. Hindi siya free sa macbook. Since hindi siya pareho sa lumang macs, kailangan siyang bilhin. Kainis. Hindi pa naman siya mura. I still can't use my mac for presentations dahil wala pa ako nito.
7. Buffet Dinner at Spirals. Yup, kailangan Spirals. Wala lang. I want to be lost in a sea of food, food and more food. Gusto ko lang malula. Gusto ko mahirapan mamili ng kakainin. Hehehe. Iyon lang.
Wala na akong maisip. :) Ok na ito.

Thank You Fabcasters!

2008-12-13T15:54:00.001-08:00

I had a great time during the Fabcasters' Christmas Party at Linden Suites last night. Unlike the others who stayed late (I assume), I was the earliest to go home. Anyway, it was fun to finally put a name to the face(s). Hmm, wait, I have to try to remember the names of those who were present that night: Migs, CC, Dats, Joel of course (thanks again for the invite), hmm, Ace/Crab-something/Londonguy(?) (sorry, I forgot your pseudonym, I got your name right naman di ba? hehehe), hmm the closet badets, Jo (?), Jamie/the wondering polar bear, Argie Cruz of abs-cbn, hmm, arrgh, I forgot the names of the others..sorry, I'm really bad at this considering that I'm in a med student. Again my apologies to the others if you guys are reading this. I remember your faces naman :)

Anyway, I was in my usual shy mode during the party kaya I just sat beside Migs lang and listened to their banter. Well, it's like watching a podcast of the fabcasters minus Gibbs and Tony. CC was how I imagined him to be and is very good at modulating his voice hehe. Migs was bombarded again and again with questions on why he closed his account. Joel was busy entertaining the guests. Jamie was a physical therapists cum freelance interior designer. Dats really loves dancing (he was grooving on his seat during quiet moments...meaning walang nagaasaran/nagpapatawa).

The food was delicious. I had Pasta, roast beef and fish. There's also a big revel bar (tama ba ang spelling ng revel?) which Joel sliced into small squares. Very, very yummy. Parang gawa ni Bobcy.

Hmm, ano pa ba? Well, Migs asked me about K kung gaano na kami katagal. I think I fumbled. I was counting last night on my way home kung kailan kami nagstart magdate excluviely ni K. 3 weeks ago. Nasabi ko ata 1 month.

Anyway, I hope I'm still invited next year hehe. Promise I'll stay as late as the others. Hint hint iyan kay Joel hehehe :) I won't be that shy :)

It Happened Unexpectedly

2008-12-08T19:25:00.000-08:00

Everyone knew I was waiting for someone. Even my classmates. I wasn't seeing somebody for a long time because I was always talking to someone. When the time came when talking=knowing (meeting each other), my friends were happy for me. Well until the day of reckoning came, and well, let's just say, it didn't happen as we all expected it to be.

So there I was, drinking my troubles away on a Friday night. Booze can taste really yummy when you're a.) sad b.) when it's free. To cut the long story short, I had one too many drinks, ended up doing a body shot with someone from my class (Not really that wild I know, but for me it is. Ok stop laughing). My classmates even videod it, I wasn't aware.

That was the start. I was still confused that time. I was actually feeling guilty. In my mind I was seeing someone. I needed help. Good thing there's my ever-trusty friend Mcvie. Had dinner with him. Discussed my dilemma with exhibit D. Didn't even bring up the thing with K because I thought it's just one of those crazy incidents during drinking sessions. After that talk, well, I got a clearer picture of things.

The next few nights became study dates, dinners and coffee with K. K knows about exhibit D, and the others. That's what happens when you talk about your personal life with your friends/classmates. They know everything and everyone you are seeing. Ack, so in short, I came clean with all the people I went out with. I told K that we'd take it slow because I want to be sure of this. Iba when you're starting to see someone from your class. Imbes na siya yung mapressure (since he just came out after that body shot thing), mas naprepressure ako. K came out to people because of me. I told him na hindi naman kailangan gawin iyon, pero desidido daw siya. Ting ting ting! I felt pressured that time. Second, hindi naman siya nag-out sa lahat. So I don't know how to act in class. I was telling K nga na sometimes I don't know what to say when people ask questions. mas madami pa siyang nasabihan compared to me since I was really, really in a dilemma kung sino ang kailangan sabihan. Third, people are extremely supportive of us. I mean I'm friends with everyone in class, pero the thing is, barkada niya belongs to the far-end subsec of our class while ako nasa 1st subsec, which means we really don't get to hang-out except on special occassions. I'm glad naman that they are very welcoming to me. I mean I was invited to their Christmas Party. I was included in their study groups. It's nice really, na-ooverwhelm lang ako sa mga pangyayari. Looking at it, it's really a good thing that they like me for K. I guess everything kinda happened unexpectedly.. It kinda swept me off of my feet..even before I can react.

Do I like what is happening? Yeah, I do. Anyway, K just popped the question (ano tayo?) last night. I said that we are exclusively going out, we should take things slow, and not rush into 'us'. I reassured K that I'm not seeing my ex's anymore, cancelled dates with people. I went out of my way to inform him kung sino mga dinate ko dati (kahit hindi naman kailangan, para lang hindi na siya magtanong in the future) at kung sino mga friends ko. Come to think about it, parang 'us' na din e. We study together. K does the small sweet stuffs like wake me up in the morning (I have a hard time waking up for 7 am classes), brings me home after a study/movie/dinner date. Attends mass with me(mas religious pa kaysa sa akin). Everything is like how I wanted it to be it's just that I want to prolong the 'dating phase' pa. Get to know each other more. You know, the kilig phase. I've been into 5 relationships already and I know for a fact that, after you become a couple, the kilig phase just happen like once in a while. Hay, yeah, it's just me having my weirdo moment again.. I'm happy naman, that's what matters :) We're happy :)

Choice

2008-12-07T23:33:00.000-08:00

Time to choose.

Hazy=Clear

2008-11-30T21:05:00.000-08:00

Hazy things can send you some really clear messages

Tomorrow, Tomorrow

2008-11-29T09:11:00.000-08:00

I love you tomorrow, you're always a day away...

Yup, tomorrow(/later, dahil supposedly ginagawa ko itong entry ng maaga-aga, hindi sa umaga) I'm going to Legaspi Park Market with Carlo. Dapat Salcedo Market iyon. Nagtext siya na samahan ko siya. E may video shoot kami, sabi ko if he wants Legaspi Park market na lang since yun yung meron tuwing Sundays. E wala namang plano, at kaladkarin talaga ako ng kung sino-sino, ayon, go go go. Hopefully maging kasing fun siya ng Salcedo Market; madaming food at kung ano-anong abubot.

Afterwards, it is my lola's monthly free day sa psych ward. I'll bring her out of UST Hospital Psych Ward and walk with her. Basically, spend time with her lang naman. I thought of bringing her to Jollibee since favorite niya yung fried chicken doon. I hope tomorrow wala siyang tantrums and that she remembers me. Miss ko na siya. I hope maexcite siya kapag binalita ko na irerenovate na ang third and fourth floor ng bahay. Na kapag lumabas siya ng hospital, for sure, spanking new ang kuwarto niya! Sana matuwa nga siya :)

Manonood ako ng Twilight tomorrow/later!Yey! May sasama na sa akin hihi. Thanks Thanks Thanks. Unless magbago isip niya hehehe. Sana hindi. Pagdadasal ko nga hehehe. Kasi wala na akong mahanap na sasama sa akin. Lahat ng kakilala ko either napanood na or walang balak panoorin ito.

Anyway, antukin na ako. Looking forward to November 30, 2008. At least masasabi ko cum Tuesday na may nagawa din ako sa long weekend kahit hindi natuloy ang out of town ko by myself :)

Moment

2008-11-29T09:04:00.000-08:00

This is my version of playing the drums hehehe. Stress reliever/photo-op moment namin siya sa bahay nila Paula during shooting breaks. Hay, ang sarap magtatatambol lang doon. Lahat kami nag-moment sa babies ni Paula. :)

Used and Wasted

2008-11-28T22:15:00.000-08:00

November 28, 2008.

Preventive Medicine Video Shoot at Paula's place in New Manila.

Kahit inaantok pa, we headed to QC to start on the project which is due Wednesday. I'd rather work on the sidelines, pero, as usual, my girly classmates made me the star of the video. Hmph hmph hmph. Di naman ako mayunong umarte. Buti na lang comedy ang role, hindi serious.

Since Waste Management ang aming topic, we went from house to house interviewing household helps. Siyempre na ka costume ako as Indiana Don'ts/Kuya Kim. Ang hirap magpigil ng tawa lalo na kung tumatawa ang mga maids na iniinterview namin. May acting pa at habulan hehe.

At the end of the day,pagod na pagod, na pagod kami. As in used talaga ang itsura. Pero may b-day party pang kailangan attendan sa Timog. Buti I brought a spare shirt. Sumabay ako kina Tinie and Derrick to Timog. They have a dinner with their barkada at Chili's. Ako, they dropped me off at Off the Grill.

Off the Grill November 28, 2008

Birthday party nila Kai, Rei, Rhenz and Jc. Siyempre early bird pa din ako hehe. Wala pa ang ibang mga tao, nandoon na ako. 5th wheel ako sa couples. Medyo awkward pero ok lang hehe. Hay makes me want to be with someone that time. Sad. Anyway, I took out a stick and puffed my first cig after a long time. My first was when I was still seeing the lawyer. L made me puff, tumatanggi ako minsan pero, sometimes I indulge him. Pinatry pa ako ng MJ, pero not my thing. Anyway, last night was a menthol cig. I love the aftertaste. I asked for a sangria dahil I know malakas ako tamaan kapag red wine. Then nagserve pa ng mga mixed drinks. Dahil masarap siya, medyo nakarami ako. Madami na din naman dumating that time. I was seated with Ken. Inom din siya ng inom. Nagpapapulaan na ata kami niyan e. People were doing body shots. Nung dumating sa amin, Ken gave me one sa neck. It was my first time hehe. Obvious na hindi mahilig uminom. Then when it was my turn, I just imitated what he did. Sa neck din ako. After that, one last time sa chest naman daw niya hihi.

Ending? Lasssshhhiiiiing ako. Nagsuka ako ng ilang beses. Sa cr ng bar at sa bahay. Hay. Happy birthday guys. Thanks for the party. Thanks for making me sooo wasted yesterday. I needed that. Really.

Step back

2008-11-27T23:24:00.000-08:00

How many steps backward can you make in a blink of an eye? Lemme try

Mumbai

2008-11-26T22:21:00.001-08:00

Something bad suddenly happened today and it occured in Mumbai. Crazy! Read the news to find out.

Insomnia

2008-11-26T10:26:00.000-08:00

Darn. I still can't sleep. 2:30 am na. Wala pa din. Gusto mangulit ng kung sino-sino. Naiinis ako. I want to sleep, pero di makatulog. nagcicirco sa utak ko ang kung ano-anong bagay. Nagugutom ako pero ayoko ng kumain. Shhhhhhhuuuuuccckkkks. 7 am pa ako tom. I want to sleeeeeeeeppp! Nagbasa na ako ng news. Tumingin ng mga toreents na pwedeng idownload. Nagcheck ng friendster, multiply, at ngayon ay nagbloblog ulit. Nahyhyper ako. Arrggghhh. Nah. Hindi pa din ako makatulog. May gising pa ba now? Gusto ko mangulit.

Not Horny

2008-11-26T09:39:00.000-08:00

On our way home, Fil-am 1 asked me if I'm sleepy already. I said no. I'd probably surf the net when I get home. Fil-am 2 is doing something else. When we dropped-off Fil-am 2, Fil-am 1 asked me to move at the backseat. I moved.

On the way to Fil-am 1's place, he asked me again if I'm going to sleep already. I said I might just lie in bed until I fall asleep. Then he said: why don't you come over my place, let's hang out. Ting ting ting ting. I said: Maybe some other time, we have classes tomorrow. We really do. Both 7 am. And I'm not comfortable hanging out at his place at this time of the night.

We said our goodbye's. On the way home, Fil-am 1 texted: Are you sure you don't want to hang-out? I'm discreet. Hmm, caffeine overload is probably kicking-in, I was able to think of a nice answer para di siya ma-offend na hindi ako interested. I said: Don't worry my mouth is shut, maybe next time na lang. Let's hang-out without the bulky books.

Akala ko end of the conversation na pero he texted again. Sabi: All right, but you can turn around now and we can mess around. Uy mapilit. I thought of a non-offensive answer. I replied: that's soooo tempting. not tonight though, we have classes tom e. He replied again. Ayoko na itype ang haba. Basta ang ending e good night. I replied good night na lang again.

One huge whew!

Di naman siya nag ganyan dati. Must be the my shirt or what. Hahaha. Friends lang talaga tingin ko sa kanya. And I'm not horny.

Christmas Wish List

2008-11-26T08:42:00.000-08:00

I want:

1. Peace of mind and peace in my heart. No, ayoko pang lumagay sa tahimik. Gusto ko lang na walang problem na maisip.

2. Good health for my family and friends. Speedy recovery for my mom and lolo and lola. Ganoon na din sa mga may sakit.

3. Stable job for my two sisters and bf's na din haha.

4. I want to have abs! Hahaha yun talaga e. Ang hirap naman kasi maachieve. Sana pagising ko ng Christmas meron na ako biglang ganon hehe. Gusto ko yung parang kay Bryan. Kung kaya niyang magkaroon ng ganon while in med, kaya ko din!

5. Love life. Lol. Di ako materialistic! Hahaha

To like

2008-11-26T07:58:00.001-08:00

To like or not to like. That's not even the question. How do you act on it? Alam naman niya na I'm interested. Pero I don't want to push it. I mean I don't want to look super interested. Funny, I know, because I am interested naman talaga. Complications. I'm not good pa naman in reading actions/intentions. I need to ask my friends pa if they think interested din siya sa akin. They think so. Hmm, I don't know. Maybe. Maybe interested lang sya sa friendship. Pero ganon naman siya dapat di ba? Friends muna. Wait. Nagwowork pa ba iyon? Dati with past relationships, ang bilis, kami agad in a few days, then saka nagkakaproblems. Pero ang tagal namin nag last ha. Anyway, naisip ko dapat matagal na getting-to-know phase sa susunod . Nung last, ang tagal na ligawan/getting-to-know you, kala ko ok, turns out di ko naman masyadong kilala yung tao, left me for someone. Hmm, complicated di ba? Where do you draw the line? How long ba dapat? This is soo beyond the point na actually. I'm just thinking about someone right now. Just thinking tapos ano-ano na naiisip ko. Well, it's really a dilemma. Ang dami-daming "dapat ganito, dapat ganyan" sa relationships. Wala bang clear-cut way sa relationships? Grr, I should be a pro in this already after 5 relationships, but I still am not. It's like my first time, every time. What to say, what to do.. The purple guy, I'll call him grimace from now on, is a flirt. And I am now officially irritated. I'm sooo distracted. Ayaw kasi lumipat nitong mga 2nd years. Gusto ko na umuwi tuloy.
I'll think of the long weekend na nga lang. Ano kaya gagawin ko?

Space-out Entry

2008-11-26T07:31:00.000-08:00

Some things I don't like about myself:
1. I space-out. Really. Parang absence seizure minus the automatisms.
2. I am mushy. I still like MLTR. Ack.
3. I stop my world for people. Yes, I do. Sometimes it is good. Most of the time not, that is according to friends . Sabi ni Bel, I make people feel so special sometimes kaya I get a.) abused b.)taken advantaged c.) taken for granted.
4. I think too much.
5. I don't think at all. Am I even making sense?
6. I am still bothered by the guy in purple. Grr.
7. I love hugs and holding hands. I hate it. I have to start pretending that I don't want one. Grr.
8. Second years were asking me if I go out. Bars and all. I wish I could say yes, but I can't. I really am not into it. Though I wish I am. I'd rather eat and hang-out. Everyone's into it. I wish I am too. Ok, I'm overthinking again. Must be the caffeine kicking in.